Odd Job – Professional Suite Filler

Hello Everybody! It’s your pal MySoxSummer and I wanna be a Professional Suite Filler.  Do you know what that is?  I am guessing no.  Does it even exist?  I fucking hope so!  I am gonna write a whole blog about my qualifications and my thoughts on why I would make the best rent-a-friend eva.  So let’s break it down.

 

How I Got The Idea

If you pay attention to our twitter (@fromthe108), you might have noticed that I was in a killer suite when the AZ DBacks were playing our sisters to the north.  Nope, I haven’t jumped ship, my wife’s cousin is a professional funny guy – T.J. McFarland – who happens to throw baseballs really good for the Arizona Diamondbacks.

USP MLB: SAN DIEGO PADRES AT ARIZONA DIAMONDBACKS S BBN ARI SD USA AZ

Quick History Lesson – I was living in AZ when the DBacks beat the Yanks to win the 2001 World Series.  I worked for Alice Cooper’sTown which is a badass BBQ / Comfort Food joint right up the street from Chase Field, and across the street from United Airlines Arena.  I met a bunch of athletes during my days there, drank a ton of free beer, ate really good free food and even watched “Mr. Belding” a.k.a. Dennis Haskins do body shots off a young lady during a fundraiser for Alice’s charity. I have more stories that I would love to share, maybe someday I will write that blog.  Maybe off season.  We’ll see.

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So anyways, I am in a the best suite in Wrigley.  No shit.  Directly behind home.  Our suite neighbor to the left was none other than the architect of the rebuild, Theo Epstein.  It was pretty boss.  Our host was a great guy, who remembered everyone’s name and what they were drinking.  He ordered multiple things to eat, drink and when that desert cart came around, goddamn.  Bailey shots in chocolate cups.  Wonderful.

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If you don’t remember the game on Thursday, there were several rain delays and I can’t even tell you how sweet it was to not have to move out of the rain, or even give a fuck if the game was gonna start again cause you are eating your face off and drinking tons of free Heiniken.  The starting pitchers were Q vs Grenkie, so i was expecting an epic pitch off, but those rain delays really killed the momentum.  So I just enjoyed my wife’s extended family and had a great time.

Now, as you might or might now know, I have a young daughter, Little Miss Shortstop.  My wife’s birthday was the following day, so I let her stay for the game and I left about 6.  Big thanks to my SIL Shannon for watching my daughter for about 8 hours.  She rules.  So as I walked home, drunk and full of life, I decided that my dream job would be a professional suite filler.

During the course of our conversations, the suite host told me how hard it was in previous years to get the suite filled.  Amazing. I thought Cubs fans were the best?  I can only imagine how hard some of these guys on the southside must be working to fill theirs.  So that is where I come in.  I can be that filler.  Why me?  Glad you asked.

My Qualifications

Reason # 1 – I drink beer.  Alot of beer.  At first look you are thinking, uh, that doesn’t sound like a good thing.  On Thursday, I knew the crowd was a bigger fan of domestics and hard booze. I scanned that fridge upon entry, we were a little late, and there was more Heiniken than any other beer.  So that was the beer I drank.  And no one drank that beer.  If I was on the southside, and no one wanted the Budweiser, I would drink that.  Yes, I would take one for the team.  I also have a decent amount of knowledge on craft beer. I can explain most beers.  It’s a skill.

Reason #2 – I don’t eat much.  While I am a huge fat guy, most of my extra lbs come from massive amounts of beer consumption. I eat minimal food, unless there is a plentiful amount.  I do not wanna be the fat guy that everyone looks at and says that is why we have no food left.  Not gonna happen.

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Reason #3 – I kinda know a little about baseball.  I can at the very least nod my head in agreement when I have 0 fucking idea who you are talking about.  Ask the fellas, hell they might not even know that I am pulling a Swingers style move when they talk about draft picks or our recent pick ups.

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Reason #4 – I have tons of stories that fall into the PG-13 and R category.  Yep, just gonna say that.  Some involve famous folks, some are from college, some are from my 10 years out west.  Wanna know more? Invite me to your suite.

Reason #5 – I don’t look like I CAN’T fight.  If we get in a pinch and we need some muscle, I at least look the part.  Get to talking to me, I am not that guy, but my looks and size scare away potential troublemakers.

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So there you have it! I feel like I could really excel in this line of work.  So do you know any guys that have a suite?  Send them my way – @mysoxsummer is my Twitter.  Or hell even email me at mysoxsummer@gmail.com.  If last night was any indication of the year to come, you are gonna need me to fill your suite!

-MSS

This week is the week folks!  Wanna meet and party with us?  Then show up Friday or Saturday for 2 108 special events! (Truth be told, there is a pretty good chance you can get drunk with us on Monday or Tuesday, just won’t be an official event)

Badergate At The Park – Elvis Night! 

Date: August 25th

Location : TBD (But usually Lot E)

Time: 4pm

What: Free Baderbrau beer.  Free Baderbrau food.  Free swag from the 108 boys. Do you need any other reasons to come get drunk on Friday night?  Be there or be square.

Fill The 108 Night! MSS Turns 40! Star Wars Night 

Date: August 26th

Location : Section 108 / $20 Tickets

Time: 6pm

What: My Sox Summer is turning 40 on Aug 20th, but we won’t celebrate till the 26th.  We have 30 plus tickets bought already for our friends and family, let’s buy even more.  MSS would suggest you get them at the box office to save on fees and get there early to get the bobblehead.  If you don’t want that bobblehead give it to MSS.  Ha.  We promise to be drunk AF and we will go live a few times.  Have fun in a full 108! We might have to get an extra Modelo vendor that night to handle all the requests.

Bring back ______ and other nonsense.

Happy 2017! The year the White Sox, as my Cub buddy put it, “Finally looked to the Cubs to see how to do it right.”  Of course the Sox have rebuilt before, but ya know nothing counts till the Cubs do it.  So thanks to the Cubs for legitimizing what teams have been doing for years.  I might have to write a blog about our conversation on NYE, I might not, we’ll see.  Let’s just say this, it included making fun of the new field name (deserved, but who cares if they win), what to do with the homeless population on 35th and Shields in the off season and some great “that damn Jew” talk.  It was ludicrous. OH NOOOOOOOOOO! The fight’s out / I’ma ’bout to punch yo…lights out.

So all the fucking time I see “Bring back Ozzie!”and “We should get AJ to play/manage us!” It can get me frustrated, I can get a little upset, but usually I write it off.  But in 2017, I take issue with it.  Let’s look at these claims.

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Ozzie is my homeboy.  Yep, he is.  I love Ozzie.  I thought Ozzie was perfection for a White Sox manager, as far as off the field.  Calling Jay Marriotti a “f@g”, making fun of Wrigley (and even buying a shirt that made fun of him) and overall just being the greatest type of person to represent the southside.  It was a great time…….when there was success.  2010 it ran a little thin and in 2011 it broke. Ozzie went down south, got PAID, and stunk up the joint.  You could argue that they really didn’t try down there, but Ozzie’s comments on Castro kinda showed he DGAF and was ready for some time off.  I can’t see the Blizzard Of Oz in the front office, and taking up his old position seems really lame.  Plus Kenny is a lifer, sadly.

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I’d blame Kenny Williams for the years of losing, but he is Jerry’s boy so ya know, that ain’t changing.  If you look at moves after Ozzie, thay have K Will written all over it.  The hiring of Rick Hahn and Robin Ventura (and now Ricky) just show that he was looking for guys who would take some direction.  But you might be saying “But MSS it is Rick Hahn who is making this rebuild happen” to which I would say correct, but only cause K Will has been failing since 2009.  I imagine a nice conversation over Cuban cigars and fine liquor.  Jerry having to talk down Kenny to make him listen to Rick.  Jerry saying “Now Kenny, you’ve done your plan and it doesn’t work, so let’s let Rick try”.  And the Cubs winning might have sealed the deal.  Who knows?  My line with Kenny doesn’t seem to be working at the moment, but next time I see him, I will ask him.

Ozzie had some experience before he came to Chicago to manage.  We tried to one up that and hire a guy with 0 experience and while it almost worked for a year, we had 4 more years of crappy baseball.  Ricky should be an upgrade, but only time will tell.  You know who also has 0 experience?  The #2 request for our new manager A.J..

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Listen, I get it.  2 of the most vocal players for the White Sox, hell any team they played on, are looking to continue their work in this fine game.  Yes, we gave Ozzie a chance and it worked out, no we shouldn’t bring him back.  Do we want to offer a job that we gave to RV with 0 experience to A.J. with no experience?  I don’t think so, I’d rather see him go up the ranks in the minors and see if he really wants to do it.  You don’t give dream positions to guys who haven’t paid their dues.  Not in Trump’s America. Just like our president elect did it, he created it all himself.  I feel giving him the reigns would be catastrophic at this point.  There are gonna be some lean years ahead of us, no need to burn out A.J. with that bullshit.  Ricky can handle it.  I have faith in Ricky.  I think so anyways.

I think A.J. would be a great defensive manager one day.  I’d point to the Sox defense in 2013, they sucked.  2012, best in the MLB.  Difference?  A.J. left and no one was there to yell at Alexi.  Or Gordon.  Or anyone in the infield.  From what I have heard he held guys responsible for their play on the field.  Something that has been missing for years and years.  I like to think that Ricky will change that, we’ll see.

We have some time before we really have to tweek the manager, if we even have to tweek it.  Ricky has something to prove after being shoved aside on the northside, let’s hope he makes his mark early and often.  So settle in, enjoy the cheap tickets while they last, and learn to enjoy baseball again.  It isn’t what the southsiders have been trying to quickie fix for the past 4 years, it’s watching kids grow, become the stars.  Like Tim Anderson last year, let’s hope we find a few more this summer.

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Happy New Year Fam!  Big things are coming for the 108 in 2017.  We have some t-shirts getting printed as I type this.  Look for us at SoxFest and maybe you’ll get a “108 Exclusive” shirt.  Follow us on FB here! We go live from time to time, mostly while drunk. We also have our Twitter that you can follow here!

 -MSS

@MYSOXSUMMER

Why I’m wearing my Sox jersey tonight and you should too.

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Beer. It’s what’s for dinner. And breakfast. And lunch. And snacks.

The time has come my friends, tonight we all lose.  Either the Indians (a hated division rival) break a multiple decade streak, or those damn northsiders will finally have something to celebrate other than their perfect attendance.  Sorry Sox fans, unlike the 1985 Bears championship, our total dominance in 2005 will soon be forgotten (and one can make a case that it already has) by the lazy media and half the city of Chicago.  Don’t fret though, 11-1 is always gonna be in the record books, baseball fans will never forget and us Sox fans will carry that torch till we win it again.  So tonight wear your Sox jersey proud as it might be the last time we can celebrate that magical season without hearing a northsider him and haw about how they have 3 rings now too!  And how they did it in dramatic fashion.

Which, as a side note if it does happen that way, is nothing to be proud of.  Facing the brink of elimination to make your guys give you the best they have isn’t the sign of a great team.  Wining the World Series in any amount of games is a great accomplishment, don’t get me wrong, but if it happens tonight Cubs fans, doing it in 7 after being down 3-1 doesn’t make it any more magical.

Tonight should be a wake up call to the Sox organization. Since 2005, 5 AL Central teams have been in the World Series.  Hell, if you just look at recent history, 2012 till 2016 4 out of the 5 AL teams have been from the AL Central. That alone should make us want to compete, which it looks form the casual observer that we are, but we all know the deal.  Seems like when we do spend money, it’s on guys who we shouldn’t have.  And the guys who we should spend money on, we don’t.  Its just odd that we will take a risk on James Shields (Dunn, LaRoche), but won’t put out the scratch to get a big name free agent.

This team has no identity, between our two big stars, one has hissy fits and acts like a child, the other can’t speak english. Nothing wrong with that mind you, but there is no leader.  We haven’t had a leader since AJ left, and if you don’t believe that, look at our defense in 2013.  Best in all of baseball in 2012, 2013 we just sucked. So we need to get someone to sack up and lead this team.  Will it happen?  Not sure there is anyone here that can do that.  I had hopes for Eaton, or Frazier, but they came into a situation with Sale and Abreu being the guys that should be the leaders and I am sure that is awkward.  Plus, seeing how many people that have been blocked by Frazier on Twitter, not sure how that guy could lead anyways.  I would tweet him about it, but yup you guessed it, offering to buy him a drink when he first signed with the team got me blocked.  No biggie.

Our organization doesn’t have the stones to do a complete rebuild, and from listening to some of the fans, I am not sure that the reason is valid.  I’ve heard from several people that the Sox couldn’t afford to do it as the remaining fans would just check out. Which, 1- I don’t know how it could get worse and 2 – Us true fans would rather being watching L’s with  youngsters trying to get better other than the older guys.  It feel like the Sox have been half in and half out on everything and that just doesn’t work.  Cubs looked like shit for years, but it paid off.  Would it go that way for us too?  Don’t know.  I doubt it, but we can try?  What we are doing now isn’t working either, so let’s develop some talent and get some of these guys that are good to some better teams so they have a shot to win one.

Alot of our moves for new guys seem rather stale, shit we’ve seen before.  Is it time to shake up the front office? Develop some new ideas? Have a new plan of attack?  HELL YES, HELL YES, HELL YES. I like loyalty, I live my life by it, I trust people based on it, but you have to have results, which we just don’t get.  So why are we loyal to people that aren’t getting the job done?  That’s fucking wrong.

I hope tonight while we watch a team that is a division rival or a created rival due to proximity (and jackwagon fans), win a title that we should have contended for, someone on 35th and Shields decides that enough is enough.  That .500 isn’t good enough.  That we’ll catch up with the rest of the AL Central. That we’ll make the moves to win another one.  That our loyal fanbase deserves better.  That just showing up doesn’t cut it any longer.  That they won’t accept losing anymore.

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So while the world is watching another curse or streak get broken, take some time and don your Sox jersey and remember that moment in 2005 when we were on top.  That night we SWEPT the World Series. It really doesn’t seem that long ago, but watching other teams just pass us by without a fight from our organization is hard, really hard.  We’ll get there again Sox fans, believe me.  Have a Lite and a smile.

-MSS

@mysoxsummer

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Also, here is some original art for you to post all over FB.  Or Twitter.  Or Snapchat, whatever the fuck that is.  IG too!

follow_us_fromthe108

Save the World Series Cubs fans! (Or make it a reality Indians fans!)

Buy this.  Cubs will win for sure!

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Wanna save the World Series Cubs fans? Let me tell you how it can happen. I bought this jersey because I am a big fan of the movie, Major League. I had yet to wear it until Game 1 of the 2016 World Series. And, yup, you guessed it, the Indians won. I know what you are saying, lucky night, but wait there’s more! For Game 2, I was out on business and I didn’t wear the jersey and guess what? The Cubs won! I was even skeptical myself, so for Game 3, I wore the jersey. Indians won! Last night, I went to a friends house to watch the game, donned the jersey and the Indians won big. Sold yet?

If you “Buy It Now” I will ship today, after it is paid for of course! I will not wear it ever again so the Cubs will win the rest of the games giving them their first World Series trophy since 1908. You can destroy this jersey, burn it, blow it up, whatever you wish! Remember this jersey can break curses that were set many years ago by a guy with a goat!

I cannot control who will buy this jersey, so you better act fast Cubs fans. If you are an Indians fan and you want your team to win tonight, contact me and I will instead wear it tonight to secure the victory. After they win I will ship it to you ASAP. You can add this magical jersey to the parade and display it next to the WS trophy as the MVP. I was skeptical that the powers were real, but after the ass whoppin’ the Tribe put on the Cubs last night, you and I can both agree it’s unquestionable now.

I feel the price of the jersey is fair when you consider it’s a World Series championship!

The jersey will ship Priority mail from the good ol’ USPS with tracking provided. It was made in China.

Send this to your Cubs fan buddy!  Have them take up a collection to save this World Series!  Follow us on Facebook!

The Playoffs. Yep, it’s gonna suck.

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Yeah.  I know.  But I posted this to make a point.  This started floating around last year and it angered me a little, almost wrote a blog about it then, but I got drunk and said fuck it.  But this year, oh it’s on.

Why do I hate this?  Mostly because it states that if you are from Illinois you should be a Cubs fan.  May I be the first to say FUCK THAT.  2 teams in this city, 2 sets of die hard fans. Also calling a fan an asshole because they refuse to flip flop is just a dumb move.  You ride and die with your team folks, if some dumb meme will make you change sides, you suck balls. I think flip flopping or being all wishy washy – “I just like Chicago baseball!” – should be saved for just the out-of-towners living in this majestic place we call home.  I’d call you an asshole for being a turncoat. I’d call you an asshole for all sorts of shit to be honest, but in this case if you aren’t true to your team, you are the asshole, asshole.

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7 years old and already sick of this guys mouth.

In 2005 I didn’t want any Cubs fans cheering for my Sox, I couldn’t have given two fucks less if you were from Chicago and not cheering for them. I would respect you less if you were a Cubs fan and were riding the Sox bandwagon. Does this reek of insecurity?  Of course it does, at least for the guy making the meme.  I don’t think all Cubs fans believe this, just some of the jackwagons that I am friends with on FB.  Ha.  You got a great team, you have a huge fan base, enjoy!  You don’t need all the fans.  I know it will piss people off when I say that I am not pulling for the Cubbies, but yeah, ew.

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I wasn’t rooting for them in ’03 or ’15, but I wasn’t rooting against them.  I got friends and family that deserve to see their team win the WS.  But I am not buying any gear to cheer them on or posting sweet memes on FB cheering those guys on.  You can do that with the Bears and the Bulls, and clearly you can do that with the Blackhawks (they maybe had 7 fans before Kane and Toews got signed). But you cannot do that with the Cubs and Sox. It forces you to make a decision and stick with it.  Some would say that I was cursed being born to a proud Sox fan, but I saw my team win.  I saw my team win in magnificent fashion.  I’ll take it.  I’ve never followed the herd and there isn’t a herd on the southside according to our attendance.

Here are some things I know you will see in the next few weeks-

You’ll see a lot of “true fans” which is always fun.  Hell, they might be.  They might be there for the party.  But who are we to judge?  My good friends that are Cubs fans deserve this as much a I did in 2005.  They also understand that they need to win the games. It’s not a given they just win.  I never thought for a minute that the Sox would have had the success they did in 2005, especially in the Playoffs.  And I guess that is what gets under my skin a little. It is a long road still, it’s not a given they will get out of the first round yet alone win the series.

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Holy fuck.  King of the Assholes everyone!

There is gonna be a shit ton of people talking baseball that have no idea how baseball works.  If you already are a Cubs fan, you should be used to this. Oddly this is not limited to just girls.  I plan on staying as far away from the northside as possible. Hell, I have a concert at the Metro with the boys on Dec 16th (Helmet and Local H) and that might be cutting it too close if the boys in blue make it happen.  Ugh, I don’t even wanna think about that.

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Lotta shit talking on the White Sox.  Hell, that has already started.  Some is deserved, but goddamn, most of us Sox fans have to agree that the product that has been passed off as baseball on the southside since 2013 is god awful.  News flash, unlike some Cubs fans who have a direct line to Theo, just because I am a Sox fans doesn’t mean I agree with the path this team has decided to go. I like the departure of Robin. I would love a total rebuild, even firing a few top level guys (KENNY), but as I will tell anyone that will listen I have 0 faith in our front office to get what our big guys are worth on the open market. But I am part of the problem, I continue to throw money at this organization to watch shitty baseball. So in short, Cubs fans, zip it. You have shit to be happy about, you don’t need to talk down the southsiders to make yourselves feel any better.  Well, maybe if you lose you can do that. Sox fans zip it too.  This Cubs team is pretty good.  If they had on black instead of blue I’d take it.  Great players that bought into the team.  We can respect that.  But fuck asshole Cub fans. No respect given.

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Every media outlet will forget about 2005.  Much like Rudy Giuliani forgot that 9/11 happened BEFORE Obama took office, most media outlets will forget the complete dominance that was on display for the entire county during the 2005 MLB Playoffs.  And also like Rudy Giuliani, most media outlets will be sucking the Cubs balls like Rudy does for Trump.  We as Sox fans are used to that, but it will be even worse now that the Sox have played themselves into oblivion.

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Ditka. So gross. So gross.

Joe Maddon will be the next Mike Ditka. I like Joe, I think he is a great person to have running your team.  Especially if you have a great team.  He seems to develop young talent like a mofo.  The Cubs have had some great personalities running their squads, Dusty Baker and Lou Piniella come to mind, but Joe will be the one they remember if they win this thing.  I just hope that he doesn’t go all conservative and and ask waitresses “Can I eat your pussy?” later in life, cause that’s not a good look coach.

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Impressed that shirt has held up since 1908.

Everyone you fucking know will be the biggest fucking Cubs fan all playoffs. Yep, they will. “Oh I can’t do that, it’s 6 hours before the game.” There will be Cubs gear everywhere.  Every-fucking-thing will be Cubs branded. If any of your Cubs friends get’s a dog, no doubt it will be named Wrigley, or Rizzo or Bryant. But not Schwarber, that’s fucking weird.

So Sox fans, I suggest stocking up on High Life, Lite, Anti-Hero or your booze of choice for the playoffs.  You know the boys in the 108 will be drinking, so you won’t be drinking alone, ever. Take comfort that no matter what happens, your good friends Beefloaf, Chorizy-E, BigUns, Slumpbuster and My Sox Summer will be back in the 108 next April talking about random stuff and plowing through $8.75 beers like they cost a dollar. Hopefully watching a young team on a mission to rebuild, not some quick fix bullshit.  You hear that Kenny and Rick?  Help us out brahs. As always, Go Sox.

-MSS

Bandwagon Cubs Fans, Repent!

Folks, its your old buddy BeefLoaf…………this is a special post, a playoff baseball post.  This is a post that should help you and more importantly, your Cubs fan friends, enjoy baseball this time of year.  A recent series of discussions between the 108ers helped us identify that most of OUR friends that claim their fandom to the Northside team, are very, very casual fans and few, if any, actually attended, or even so much as watched or listened to games during their extended hiatus from playoff baseball.  Now, this isn’t a sin in the biblical sense, but it is a sin of fandom if you intend to sport your Cubbie blue all over the goddamn place and choose to be obnoxious to your fellow Southsider that has been living and dying with an awful team for 8 years.  So upon further review (no worries, Mike Carey isn’t advising us), I decided to create a list of things that the bandwagon Cubs fans can do to repent and feel full enjoyment for this current playoff run.  White Sox fans, please pass this list on to your Cubs fan friends and together we can live in harmony, like ebony and ivory.
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Re-embrace Sammy Sosa………..I’m tired of it, as Cubs fans, you love Sammy Sosa, so I want you to bring him back in to your life….I think hanging an 8×11 photo of him in your den should do the trick.  Extra credit for hanging a picture of “White” Sammy Sosa
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Buy an old school shirsey………….I’d suggest EITHER something from your childhood, whatever era that might be (I’m in my late 30’s so a Manny Trillo shirsey might be fun)………..OR a guy that none of the other bandwagon fans know who the fuck they are…….like 2012 All Star Bryan LaHair
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Drink nothing but Old Style for an entire playoff game.  It used to be the main beer at the park on Sheffield and Addison, so go nostalgic and knock back some Old Style
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Rewatch Glenallen Hill’s May 11, 2000 monster fucking home run.  It’s seriously the longest fucking home run I have ever seen (I don’t care what the record books say).  And it’s so easy to find in the YouTube era, so go check it out.  If it is your first time viewing it, please watch it in private, because it’s NSFW
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7wDrw76ieTs
Adopt some vintage Cubs styles to your personal ensemble……I’ll leave this to your imagination, but a couple of things that would really endear you to the hard core Cubs fans and your White Sox brethren as well would be getting a perm like 80’s closer Lee Smith, or possibly an I ❤️ Sandy Sandberg tattoo, you know, something really classy
Say it out loud, so all can hear…”FUCK RYAN DEMPSTER AND HIS STUPID FUCKING IMPRESSION OF WILL FARRELL DOING HARRY CARAY!!!!” We all know this sucks, and I’m still not sure why this is allowed to be on TV.  You’ll be considered part of the die-hards if you say this blows

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Make sure others know that you blame Alex Gonzalez and Dusty Baker’s over usage of Mark Prior in game 2, for the 2003 team’s NLCS collapse, and NOT Steve Bartman.
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Create a macaroni statue of your favorite current player or coach, I’d suggest Chris Bosio as it would take the most possible macaroni of any person in the dugout.   Don’t let him near your statue though, I doubt he could resist, as it appears his self control around the table is in question.
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Get into a bar fight with Kyle Farnsworth.  To be honest, most of you  have probably already done this, or if you are woman, you have been sloppily hit on by him, so this is probably the least necessary one on the list, but I’ll leave it on here for those that were incarcerated or underage during those years.

Godspeed.

 – BeefLoaf

Sox/Cubs Games at US Cellular Field SUCK!

All right, someone had to say it: Sox/Cubs games at US Cellular Field Suck!  The reason youdon’t realize this is that Sox and Cubs fans are “supposed” to have a stupid rivalry (we don’t) and Pud Selig sold everyone on why inter-league play is so great (it’s fine, but all the other leagues do it and don’t make a big deal about it)………..but these games blow…..

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I’ll admit, I enjoyed those backyard fighting videos of Kimbo Slice back in the day as much as the next guy, but what I don’t really enjoy is a fight breaking out every half inning between two knuckleheads that can’t handle their booze/got cuckold’d last weekend/were recently fired from their job……….whatever.  I’m here to enjoy a ball game, not watching a slap and tickle fight between idiots.  Fights not only cause a disturbance to those around the activity, but they also increase scrutiny from security and discourage people from being willing to bring their families…..

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Security don’t play.

OVER SERVED FANS

We in the 108 have been known to take down a beverage or two, but the Sox/Cubs games bring out the worst in people consuming………a few years back we had some rough looking fellows sitting a row back of us in the 108.  One of their party had a little too much fun and in the 2nd inning, had, what they call in the eating competitions, a “reversal of fortune”……….that was no fun………….in fact, the 108’ers had their own day in which they consumed too much Limoncello before the game…..BeefLoaf decided to remove himself from the ballpark in the 5th inning, not to be heard from until the next day.  It gets ugly.

Really, it’s amateur hour.  It’s the only thing that rivals St Patrick’s Day, because it has all the same elements as a St Patty’s Day bar at 10pm: there’s a fight, there’s a guy puking, there’s a girl crying, and for some unknown reason, people are in John Barleycorn’s.

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“Puke and rally beeeeeeeeotch!”

CROSSTOWN CUP

Shut the fuck up with this.

It is a fake rivarly……….we all know it…………..as much as the media has always tried to pin Sox fans vs Cubs fans, we really don’t hate each other, and we really couldn’t give a fuck about each others’ teams other than some good natured ball busting.  Most years, at least one of the teams is horrible, so the stakes are meh.  I remember watching Darin Erstad try to make a diving catch in CF and his career being over…….nobody wants to see that.  It is only exacerbated by the stupid BP Cup (which was extra fun after the oil spill)…….it’s Chicago baseball’s participation trophy.

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Ozzie showed up at Dugans with this. No one cared.

THE SOX WILL SWEEP

The Sox have shown their true colors and it is time for a tear down.  But you and I both know, they’ll sweep this series or at least win it and give people a false sense of hope.  And of course, this is right before the deadline.

– BeefLoaf and Chorizy-E

The 5 – Reasons TO Buy The Hype

Have you bought in yet? Find yourself wanting to head to 35th and Shields to catch some of this awesomeness? It feels good Sox fans.  For us who have suffered through the past few seasons, we deserve this.  The players deserve this.  Ventura deserves this.  Here’s my 5 reasons to buy in now!

Offseason moves.

Unlike 2015, the Sox actually filled holes.  Frazier, Jackson, Avila. In the short term, it seems to be working. Allowing Garcia to only DH, makes sense.  Maybe will keep him healthy.  Who knows? The talent is there, let’s stay healthy guys!

AMAZINGLY Good start.

I ran into Jim Rose (@jimroseabc7) at Walgreens down on State St. I asked him his thoughts before the season started and he hesitated to give me the solid thumbs up.  he was very concerned with the clubhouse mood after the whole LaRoche  incident.  But he did say we’ll know how well this team will do a few weeks into the season.  I agree 1000%.  In 2012, they started strong and held that lead till September.  Sad decline, but was a fun year to watch Sox baseball.  I think that year also set us back, thinking that we did have the right components for a winning team, which we clearly did not after three abysmal  seasons in a row. We chatted about some other stuff, which I will share with anyone in a private conversation, then went about our way.  Mine was to look for clearance Easter candy that didn’t suck, his was for gift cards.

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Timely hitting.

It’s been kinda sparse, but last year when we had two on with no outs, you hit that slump in the order that produced little to no runs.  Had to deal with the Beckham and Flowers vortex that just sucked any momentum we had going.  This year, so far, we have seemed to come up and got a few hits that got us the runs we needed to win that game.  I hope it will continue to happen as the bats warm with the weather, but honestly, who knows. If we are down 2 runs in the 7th, this year we know it isn’t over.  Been very fun to watch.

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Matt “El Niño” Albers and the pitching staff.

I like his passion.  I like his pitch selection.  I like his overall size.  His consecutive out record that he was carrying since last August is just a nice thing to see.  Good to see the bullpen coming in and kicking some ass.  Will he keep this type of production up the rest of the year?  Maybe.  Most likely not, but let’s hope so.  Will he help you finish a helmet sundae?  You know he will.  Cause he’s a team player.

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Chris Sale is 6-0.  Mat “Cat” Latos is 4-0. Jose “Q” Quintana is 3-1.  Once again, it’s early, but these are some great numbers. I bow to you Donnie Cooper. The offense is helping it happen too. We have a stinker, Mr. Danks, but honestly that guy is trying as hard as he can.  He’s had his chance, it ain’t working, let’s bring him in for long relief situations.  I like John, but it’s time to move on.  Bring in the new guys, feed off their energy.  Feed off this hella good start.  Let’s cash in bitches!

No pressure.

Besides us crazy ass fans, no one is expecting the White Sox to do anything.  I want them to have a chance to make the playoffs.  They don’t have to make the playoffs, but I would like to see some meaningful baseball in September.  They boys up north have all the pressure on them.

We are playing the perfect hand.  The city is Cubs crazy.  The fact that the Sox have stayed with ’em as far as wins is really amazing. Fans are starting to show up on the southside, causing some longer wait times, which is pretty cool too.  The best baseball is being played in Chicago right now.  Amen. Good time to be in the city.

UPDATE – I wrote this weeks ago, still holds up, but within that time the Sox have swept two series.  They are playing crazy good right now.  I am almost fully on board.  However, I know once I buy in at 100%, shit will go badly.  So for all of you, I will not be 100% till we make the playoffs.  It’s awful fun to watch them win though.

-MSS

 

The 5 – Reasons NOT To Buy The Hype

It’s Early.

It’s way f’ing early.  Shit, the way the media is talking in Chicago, Cubs have the World Series berth locked up and maybe the Sox will compete with them in October.  Y’all are f’ing nuts.

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Crack pipe.  Yep.

John Danks. 

Yeah.  2 games, 2 losses.  Not even close.  I met John at SoxFest ’16, hell of a great guy.  Always looks really excited, possibly high, maybe it’s time to pack it up, take care of that smoking hot wife of yours and call it day.  Hell, go hang out with Dunn.  Maybe join LaRoche on one of his “missions”.  He’s not cutting it, maybe he’ll get hot later, but let’s bring him in if a young guy starts getting pounded.  He shouldn’t be starting.

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So high.

The teams we have played.

“We would have lost to the Twins last year”  – Friend in passing.

He’s right by the way.  Were the Twins better last year?  I HAVE NO F’ING IDEA.  I am a White Sox fan, I can barely keep up with them, I rely on the head nod and squinty eyes when I am asked in depth baseball questions.  Chorizy , Polish or ‘Loaf can handle your technical questions better, I rely on the ol’ eye test.  The Twins f’ing failed the eye test.  Badly.   When I see Oakland starting Phegley and Semien, I think to myself, “I know how good those guys are so you guys must really suck.”  I am sure they will come on later in the year to prove me wrong (Phegley Fever!) and I hope they do. Tribe sucks too, cause, well Cleveland.  Look what that city did to that find upstanding COLLEGE GRADUATE from Texas A&M, Johnny “Football” Manziel.  Cue Beastie Boys – Johnny Ryall.

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Jimmy Rollins.

Dude is old.  Like way old.  I am 1 year older than him. I am f’old too.  I don’t need to be on the softball field anymore, much less a MLB field.  I hope JRoll keeps not hurting himself.  I hope he continues to help us in the field and smack a hit here and there. What I am guessing will happen is one day his leg will just fall off.  You better be practicing Tyler, you let a 37 yr old guy beat you for your spot.  I met Tyler at SoxFest too, I asked him what the plans were, his handler said he was the starting SS for us.  Tyler responded with a “We’ll see”.  Yeah, cause goddamn, we’re gonna need ya son.

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Dude looks high too. I swear I bought weed from this guy several times in college.

 

Hitting.

Not long ago, Jose Abreu had to swing at anything close cause the dude wasn’t being protected by ANYONE. Now we have reigning home run champ Todd Frazier batting behind him and he still swings at junk.  Will he get more disciplined?  Maybe.  Hitting coach Todd Steverson is a hell of a nice guy too, I know he has worked hard with Jose, so I am hopeful.  But will Frazier start hitting?  Kinda a big component in the whole deal.  I hope as the weather warms up so will the bats.  Still not hitting good enough to get behind them yet.

MLB: Arizona Diamondbacks at Chicago White Sox
Hit that ball buddy.

 

So alot of things that need to be fixed before I can even list these guys an contenders.  I thought this past weekend would be a good test, lost 2 of 3.  Hoping that they can split with the Angels and take the series vs the Rangers.  I will be at a few games this week, hope to see you guys there!

-MSS

Opening Day GRIPE Predictions. By My Sox Summer

Sox fans like to complain.  Every year on a certain message board you’d see a thread the day after opening day about all the complaints. “They changed the music!”  “Beer price is higher than last year!” “Why did the guy from Journey throw the opening pitch?” “LINES” “WORKERS” “BATHROOMS” “BUN WAS STALE”. You get where I am going.  So I am gonna predict things that we all will be bitching about the Monday after opening weekend.

Locks-

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1- WEATHER – Sox can’t control that, not yet anyways. We’re all in this together. Drink more and deal with it.  (That said weather might keep people away so maybe we won’t bitch about the next thing)

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2- LINES AS FAR AS THE EYE CAN SEE – We all will bitch about the lines because we expect 40k people to stick to lines and to be ready when they get to the metal detectors.  So take you goddamn keys outta your pockets you drunk asses so we can watch the whole intro this year.  Guess what?  People are gonna want food and drinks too.  Guess what? They will all want them when the Sox are in the field.  Waiting till the 3rd, yeah, we all do that.  Drinking the amounts that we drink, we also piss.  A lot.  So expect lines.  Don’t go to the bathroom at the last minute, give yourself time.  And Sox, every year it seems like you forget that the game usually sells out for Opening Day.  Act like it.  SoxFest this year (opening ceremony on Friday) was a mess.  You can’t blame people for not following rules that you don’t enforce. You can’t blame the fans for lines (other than the jackwagons I mentioned above who ALWAYS forget their goddamn keys!).  I am hoping things go smooth, but expecting the worst.

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3- PRICES – Yep, it’s expensive to go to a game.  Nope, we don’t wanna hear about it.  I went to a movie, got some snacks, got a drink, I dropped $75 for the two of us.  Plus we paid $14 to park.  Tell me more about how it is unfair they charge $20 to park when you can get a ticket for under $10.  Especially if you come with a group.  $5 a person to park, $7 a ticket, $12 just to get in.  Seems like a swell deal to me. Plus the game might be better than the Steve Jobs Biopic that I am still pissed I spent actual money on.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jttj2N55UGU

4- THE INTRO SUCKS – More than likely it will.  Guess what?  If you are reading this you are more than likely a fan, which is short for fanatic.  We are the die hards.  We will go to the game even when they suck.  WE ARE NOT THE TARGET AUDIENCE. Once we cross from “casual” fan to “reading (or writing) blogs about the team on a daily basis” fan they won.  They got us.  They switch shit up to attract a new fan base.  One that has other clothing besides Sox related items.  Hell, BeefLoaf has a shirt that no one outside of 35th and Shields would even understand.  I am a fan and I didn’t get it.  Dude is hardcore about his shirts.  We both live in the hood too, so like it or not we’ll be there till we die or move to the ‘burbs. So if a dumbass intro attracts a new base that will bring in more revenue and excitement, by all means play Fall Out Boy.

I see the Sox hired Chance The Rapper as a “consultant”, ABOUT F’N TIME. Dude is from here and rocks the Sox hat ALL THE F’N TIME. Plus he makes music that MILLIONS like.  Dude was on SNL, what TV show were you on?

Think of Opening Day like a first date for the Sox.  They pull out all the bells and whistles for that new girl. It’s only 3 months later that you realize that you got involved with a crazy person!  That is when you see the Sox true colors.  Hell, one Monday last year I was WAITING in a line with less than 10k at the game.  That is just pathetic.  But ya know what?  I like cheap tickets and I like cost effective food and drinks.  I will put up with a little hassle to keep that game going.  ONE TIP – If I see you yelling at staff for an issue that is beyond their control I will say something.  These people do a shit job, for shit pay and don’t need to take your shit too.  Take a boxing class to get out your aggression, don’t yell at a person making minimum wage, working far too hard for it,  especially when they aren’t given the tools to achieve perfection.  You do this to my favorite italian beef ladies (Evelyn and crew) I will smack ya.  Those ladies are lovely.

Here are the odd balls.

5- JOHN DANKS PITCHING – If he would have pitched in Oakland, and we got Sale on Friday, some would be happy.  Others would say that we should have used the actual rotation that we are gonna use for the whole year and F those guys who only show up on Opening Day expecting to see the best pitcher we have.  Look at it like this, John Danks will be gone someday.  Let the guy have his moment this year.  It’s just 1 of 162 games.  Come back Saturday to see Sale and get that sweet hat they are giving away.

6 – SCOREBOARD IS TOO BIG / TOO LOUD – For years we have bitched and bitched about the scoreboard screen being small.  Guess what?  THE WHOLE EFF’N THING IS A SCREEN NOW.  Guess what?  People are gonna miss the old school look.  It’s gonna happen.  We’ll complain because deep down we know we don’t deserve this marvel of electronics.  But we do friends, we do.  I am hoping for lasers.

7 – INTRO SONGS IN SPANISH – Guess what?  Most of the guys on the field DON’T SPEAK ENGLISH. Take it easy Trump, they PAY THEIR TAXES, but they don’t know the language. I for one don’t give a shizz if they do or don’t, as long as they can hit the ball a country mile. The world extends beyond the suburbs, trust me.  Many people in the world don’t speak English, but they are really good blokes.  So enjoy the popular music of Cuba or the DR, and sip a Corona from a can.  It might warm ya up.  Who knows?

8 – SO AND SO DIDN’T SIGN MY BLAH, BLAH, BLAH – When the crowd is smaller on Sunday, you will have the autograph hounds out there.  You know, when I am trying to get focused at work, I love to sign multiple items for grown ass men and women who maybe in turn will sell it on Ebay.  That is how I get focused.  So give these guys a break, buy an autograph if you want one.

9- PEOPLE WILL JUST BITCH ABOUT HOW IT USED TO BE AND HOW IT WAS BETTER  – That’s it. Can’t argue with this people.

Nine is my favorite number so I am gonna end here. I could go for days, but I won’t bore you with my rants today, I will save them for a video some day.  See you Friday, Saturday AND Sunday.  Unless my wife goes into labor, then you will only see me Friday and Saturday. Can’t miss Sale’s first start.

– MSS #99