Cleveland. Kinda. Harder than Detroit to hate but they have more to offer than just empty buildings.
Kansas City? BBQ FOOL. I can’t hate KC for 2 other reasons too. Bo Jackson & a cool logo.
But even better than KC is Minneapolis. Have you been? Place is amaze balls. People are nice. Beer is good. And they like to get down. Any city that produced Prince, Charles Shulz and The Coen Brothers is ok by me. Here’s my top 5 reasons why I can’t hate on the Twin Cities, but not the Twins. I only need one reason to hate the Twins. Joe Mauer. #suckitmauer
“TC” Logo
Man. I wish, I so wish, I could wear this hat. But it’s the fucking Twins, fuck the Twins. It is a classic. Simple, yet so strong. As a designer, I love it. Shows pride. Unlike Chicago with our violent North vs South battle, the folks in MN decided 2 is better than 1. Which brings us to……
Minnesota Nice.
It’s a mantra. Having experienced it first hand a few times, people are just nicer. Maybe it’s because they are housebound for months on end, maybe they are just better people. I don’t know. But I do know that I got a serious friendly vibe in MN.
Atmosphere, Brother Ali & Rhymesayers Entertainment!
Back in the day I was convinced that I would enjoy California because most of the bands I liked were based in California. I lived there for 7 years, fucking spot on, besides the traffic. In 2003 I was introduced to Atmosphere. If you haven’t heard of them, wow, just wow. Go pick up When Life Gives You Lemons You Paint That Shit Gold, which is one of my favorite albums of all time. I have seen them live multiple times. Just a great show. My first show was in Long Beach, CA amazing. The second show was in Pomona, CA at the legendary Glasshouse with Brother Ali. Brother Ali is an albino Muslim who was raised in a black neighborhood. I had my doubts that first show, but goddamn, he kills it. I have seen them both perform in MN too, at their huge Hip hop show Soundset. Went two years in a row, pretty amazing.
Surly Brewery
In 2010, I met up with some friends at Brits. We drank on the roof and had a great time. I downed several pints of Guinness. The following year I found myself at Brits again and watched as person after person ordered some unknown beer. I made a comment to my brother-in-law about how this beer must be amazing and seconds after I said that a taster appeared in front of me. 6 pints later not only was I loving life but also drunk as hell. It was Surly Furious. Now you can get this all over the midwest, but back then you couldn’t. Shits amazing. A solid APA/ESB that I credit with really getting me into craft beer. Fresh is even better. Check these guys out if you get the chance, you can get 2 of their offerings at the Cell, Furious and Hell.
Prince
Do I have to explain? The guy wrote amazing lyrics and songs. He also plays better guitar than all other people combined. What more do you need? Plus his old club downtown First Avenue is just an amazing joint. Drug use and religion aside, the guy changed the game. He also had hometown pride. He NEVER left. He build his city up. Respect.
Folks, if you have been watching the White Sox recently, you know that the most exciting reason to watch (save for Chris Sale starts) is the 22 year old JuCo product from Tuscaloosa, AL. It has been absolutely thrilling to watch a homegrown White Sox hitter actually come to the majors and look like he knows what he is doing…………but of course, being a White Sox fan and viewing twitter, the inevitable occurred…..
DJ T. @cwsdjt Jun 10
This list goes on………..but White Sox Twitter is clearly terrified that their favorite new player is doomed to the failures of another former favorite new player…………I AM NOT!
WHY??
Emotionally
Gordon Beckham has caused me enough strife, and I won’t allow him back into my emotional White Sox experience……….not only did he fail spectacularly, but he hung around 35th and Shields way too long, got to play way too much and was much too beloved for a majority of that………I’ve got a good head of hair too, but that doesn’t mean people should love me even when I suck…….oh and then after I thought he was finally gone, they pulled him back in!
Analytically
They are two different players, Beckham was a completely finished product when he was drafted, in fact he hit 28 HR and played SS for a top college program as a Junior in 2008 and somehow wasn’t picked #1 overall. On the other hand, Anderson was a JuCo kid, who had mostly played basketball until a couple of years before shooting up the draft board and being drafted #17 overall in 2013. The developmental paths are very, very different, and although Anderson has downside, he has a lot of upside as well.
Mentally
I remember an early Gordon Beckham slump when he was on local radio being interviewed and his answers to questions about the slump and approach etc were concerning. On the other hand, according to hitting coach Todd Steverson, Tim Anderson has some things to work on at the plate, but his fear level is 0. For those of you that have read “Moneyball”, GB is Billy Beane and TA is Lenny Dykstra (without all of the financial fraud). That makes me feel good.
Visually
As noted previously, Gordon Beckham has great hair, and I think his handsome southern gentleman self may have distracted me (I know it distracted female fans as some still love GB, even after 5 pretty terrible season here). According to Hawk, “He has that good face” and you would hear, “he looks like a ballplayer”………….on the other hand………what we were missing was that he had a long ass swing. Anderson, to me, seems to have a very quick swing, seems to be able to react on the fly during a game and he doesn’t have a particularly obvious baseball look. He looks like a good athlete, who looks like he can play well, but still doesn’t quite know how to play. That’s reassuring, because it seems like he has upside and he’s malleable enough to change when necessary.
In closing, I hope this article is as cathartic for you as it was for me and allows you to lay Gordon Beckham’s terrible White Sox career to rest for good and to move onto what should be a lovely Tim Anderson era.
Quernzy is the lovely partner/wife/drinking buddy to our very own Chorizy-E. She likes a good time, even though she married a guy who looks like her grandpa (if her grandpa was mexican and had grey hair). She also is majorly famous having appeared in many movies and TV shows. Check her out on IMDB. Huge sports fan, it runs in her blood, as her mom’s favorite movie of all time is Rocky (and she was a season ticket holder for the O’s and Ravens).
If you’re still watching the White Sox, you’re probably drinking way more alcohol. And sometimes a beer may not be strong enough when the other team is about to score their 10th run. So I did you a favor and tested out all the non-beer options on the concourse level of US Cellular Field.
Frozen Zone
Many of you will probably start off a game by heading to the “Frozen Zone” near the bleachers and pick up a Frozen Mango Daiquiri in an obnoxious souvenir cup that you’ll never use again. But after a few sips, you will regret that decision. They are way too sweet and you will have a headache to prove it. Not to mention, a ridiculous cup that looks like you just left a horrible bachelorette party.
Vendors
Opt instead for a Frozen Margarita from the vendors in the aisles. Delicious! And just the right amount to finish before it melts. Some have Frozen Vodka Lemonade, equally good. Unfortunately, there are not a lot of these vendors, so keep an eye out for them.
Cocktails
One of my favorite non-frozen cocktails at the park is a Vodka Lemonade near Section 106 at the “K”orner Beer Stand. While you are over there, check out the Xfinity Bar near Section 108. They have a specialty cocktail menu and The ChiSox Mule is worth the long lines at the bar. If the park is packed, be prepared to wait for half an inning (aka an entire James Shields start).
And for something a little different – try the coffee with a shot of Baileys and get a souvenir mug at the “Winning Ugly is Sweet” Stand at Section 143. Now that it’s summer, this might not be the best choice, but don’t worry, the stadium will be cold and empty in just a few short months.
Overall, there are plenty of non-beer options on the first level and given the Sox recent play, you’re gonna need them.
If you are a White Sox fan, and you are on Facebook, you should already know about Chicago White Sox Pride & Passion. If you don’t, check it out. But don’t check it out if you can’t take weekly mood swings by our fan base. If we win, it’s all good, but the recent struggles that the Sox have faced are putting alot of fans on the edge just daring them to jump. With close to 14k members, it is by far the biggest White Sox group on Facebook. It was started by a mortal man named James Duda. James is a big fan. Crazy big. He shoots from the hip and unlike a certain message board admins, he allows everyone to speak their mind. To my knowledge the only things he doesn’t let you run your mouth about is the Cubs, which everyone as Sox fans shouldn’t talk about anyways, and he only wants one game thread. He is a true blue American and Sox fan.
I have been involved on several White Sox message boards for many years. I don’t wanna advertise them, but many computer loving Sox fans will know the two I was on. One was very tight, very censored and you’d get banned at the drop of a hat. One was pretty free form, allowed about anything. I posted on both these boards during my 50 for under 500 days, got alot of reads, made a bunch of friends. I am not sure how I was added into the Pride and Passion, but I know I was there within the first few thousand. James added me as a friend and I just watched it grow. Pretty sure my first post was about bobbleheads and it was met with a mixed response.
When we started this blog, I knew I wanted to do some interviews and I am honored to have my first be James Duda. He’s just like us all. Irrational, loves his Sox and is tired of the apathy that we see from our organization. So enjoy! Interview was done on 5/3 before the Sox epic collapse.
Favorites
Favorite Game You’ve Saw Live – Game 2 of the 2005 World Series. Paulie slam,Pods walk off.
Favorite All-Time Player Without a Statue on the Concourse – Ozzie Guillen
Favorite Drink and Dinner at Ballpark – I don’t drink, so water. I usually bring it in. I’ll occasionally have a brat..never buy anything inside the stadium.
Brat with kraut only. .pretty much all I’ll buy there.
Favorite Place to Sit- Back of the premium lower boxes 135 and 128 in the shade and 526 and 527 first 6 rows in the upper deck. Also love the same in the Club Level and Home Plate Club, but can’t afford it.
Favorite Uniform – I don’t have one and don’t care what they wear. Just win.
Favorite Giveaway – Anything I can sell for a lot of money (I never keep the giveaways, always sell and put the money towards the following years tickets). I did keep a White Sox luggage tag which I always use, LOL. I like the magnet schedules too.
Favorite Theme Night – Mullet Night, cause I like 80’s music.
Not Favorites
What Irks Me Most About Sox Fans- Their never ending excuses about not attending games.
What is the Worst Part of Being a Sox Fan – Knowing that the owner reinsdorf couldn’t give two shits about the fans that loyally give his business money.
In park food and drink (dislikes) – Don’t really eat there much, but once got a corned beef sandwich that i told them no mustard and they scraped it off (was ready made and i never got one again). That was the worst I’ve probably ever had from the park.
Worst Part of Game Day Experience (and how it can be changed)– The opening montage which they completely have botched since last year. They can change it back to The Pirates of the Caribbean theme. …but honestly I don’t pay attention to any GameDay shit. I’m on my phone or talking in between innings and setting up my check in and Facebook status before the game.
What Really Grinds Your Gears – Cheapness from the organization, when I spend tons of time and money to be there. Example- implementing ticket-less entry cause they wanted to eliminate having to send out tickets. CHEAP.
Most Memorable Experience as a Sox Fan– Being at games 1 and 2 of the World Series with my father and being at the blackout game with Amber.
Things the White Sox Front Office Does Well- They are loyal to their employees but too businesslike and corporate to ever relate to fans. This goes straight to the top.
Ballpark Experience How Could it be Better- just get people in and out smoothly ,open more gates for entry, hire more people with these new metal detectors so ifmt can go smoother
Deep Thoughts With James
Intro – I don’t like the new one at all and now I ignore it altogether. It’s irrelevant to me.
What Brings Me Back for Every Game- I just love watching live White Sox baseball. And now with all the friends I’ve made, it makes each game an event in itself.
Feelings On The Wave– Ridiculous, hate it! I hold Ambers arms down just so she doesn’t participate in it.
Feelings On MGD– Don’t drink beer, don’t care what they sell.
Feelings on not being able to get pizza slices delivered to your seat– I don’t really care about that. I’m a do-it-yourself type of guy, I don’t want the service. I’ll go up and get it myself.
Why did I start the group– So I’d have a place to sound off about the team and my pet peaves daily. I needed full control as I have been kicked out of many groups and others just were too lame for me . I knew I could do much better, and I have.
How did the group grow so large so fast– I added 150 friends to start and they started adding their friends so it was multiplying. Then I went in all of the other groups I was in and advertised the group (this grew it by hundreds if not thousands instantly). Then I went back when we are at around 4,000 and asked everyone to add their friends which they continue to do to this day and we’re still growing. Some people added their entire friends lists!
Feelings on some of the regular posters – I’m friends with most of these people and some I get annoyed with. Most I participate in and some I ignore. The group is all about freedom of speech (within reason) so I’m fine with whatever generally.
WSI (White Sox Interactive) or SoxTalk – WSI…used to love the website but its old and stale now (Facebook groups are much easier to participate in). As to the WSI group, I never really liked it, just too controlled for me you can’t really speak your mind. I was booted from there by the only admin George Bova for no apparent reason . He completely ruined the WSI name with his handling of the group, kicking people out at random etc. It’s basically fanboy central. If your a happy fan you can stay, if you criticize management in any way your gone eventually. That’s how he runs it. Bova is a carpet bagger anyway (he lives in Connecticut). I’m not gonna have a guy in Red Sox country tell me what’s what. SoxTalk….never really went there much but from what I have seen, similar to WSI with maybe a few more stat geeks involved. The owner Michael Gresham is another self important fanboy just like George Bova. Gresham kicked me out for advertising my group.
What famous people are in the group? – I prefer not to give away peoples identities, but let’s just say we have a bunch of ex players/coaches. Also a few front office people. Jack McDowell regularly participates in the group (I’ll name him cause people know already).
Who has contacted me through the group– Pretty much everyone. I got a few messages from Scott Merkin (Sox beat writer) who seems to be a nice guy.
The Donny Cooper Story – Ok, I added him about a month into creating the group, don’t remember if someone added him or if he came in his own. He never participated in the group but was randomly private messaging members trying to set them straight. I got messages telling me to be a fan of another team (and he still accepted my friend request lol). My wife got one calling her a jagoff and many other friends got similar messages from him. My guess was he was getting wasted at home and was online and just started spouting off. Anyway, after I broadcast his remarks towards my wife and me he left the group. It’s still a joke we tell today. What a tool. He blocked me before I could respond to him. I had the private messages in my spam box, Amber was able to respond and had a conversation with him which he was mostly backtracking and apologizing trying to make peace.
What’s my greatest fear about this team – Chris Sale gets hurt with his violent arm action.
What excites me most about the team- The pitching. We are loaded from top to bottom.
Upside of 2016 White Sox – Again, pitching. Frazier hitting behind Abreu as well.
Thoughts on Front Office – Want them all gone. Hahn could stay cause he’s been working off a shoestring budget (Jerry’s famous budget). Ken Williams has got to go. Ventura is not MLB manager material and never was.
Personal
Do You Ever Eat at Home- Yes,a lot during the off-season mostly.
Are You Wealthy – No, I’m a doorman that works full time 7am-3pm Monday-Friday by the lake front. Not wealthy at all. Earn everything I have.
How Much Do You Spend Per Game – Only pay for tickets. Never anything else.
Is Your Wife a Saint – Yes,she is. No other woman would put up with this lifestyle. Luckily for me she loves Sox baseball just as much as I do.
Kids- No. Never.
Lucky Hat – I wear a white ’83 hat for day games and a black Sox hat for night games. Both have season ticket pins on them.
What’s in Your Bag That I Take To Games- Usually a hoody just in case, 4 bottles of water and a phone charger.
Are You Gonna Run for President – No, I hate politics and don’t want fame or fortune.
What is my Favorite Baseball Word – Don’t have one.
What Gets Me Excited about White Sox baseball- The potential of another playoff run and potential World Series. Once you’ve been to the top of the mountain, it’s a high you will always chase as a fan.
What sound at the ballpark do you love- The crack of the bat with a good homer.
What is your favorite Hawkism – HE GONE.
What position would you attempt for the White Sox – Probably the marketing guy (Brooks Boyers job).
What position wouldn’t you want – GM….no way.
If heaven exists, what would you like to hear Minnie Minoso say when you arrive at the pearly gates? – I’m not religious and don’t believe in after life so question is irrelevant.
Thank you very much James Duda. You sir are an inspiration to all of us that wish we could just go to every Sox game and eat out 2 times a day. You are the Lord of the Beef Sandwich, killer of bottled water. Keep doing you.
The White Sox from time to time come up with promotions to try to fill seats. Some of them are very successful like Halfway to St Pat’s or Elvis Night. But some, some are not so good. I present you with Guys Night.
So what is the insanely cool thing that makes this “Guys Night”?
Ticket prices are discounted, which is nice, but there is also a giveaway. It’s a hat, and from the image looks kind of cool, but two problems here:
Hats are about the most unisex giveaway possible
Hat vouchers are limited to the first 500 tickets purchased
The first 500? This is about 9500 short of a normal giveaway.
I’m not quite sure what makes this “Guys Night” or even what would entice you to go to this. Maybe they can go with the fact that it will be the last time you’ll get to see Bryce Harper at the Cell for a long while? I mean, unless the Sox and Nats play in the World Series.
So I guess it’s a promotion to get 500 more people in the seats to see the reigning National League MVP .
Why do we need this?
I’m sure you’ve visited the park and thought to yourself “I wish there were more guys here.” I think in general, the Sox want more people in the seats, but I think that ratio is typically a majority guys and you’ve probably topped out in that portion of the market.
I guess they may see this as a way to sell more beer at the park on a Thursday night and maybe they’re right. And when has that ever worked out poorly for the Sox?
So why do we need this? We don’t.
Like most things in life, Dave Chappelle has already shown why this is a terrible idea.
From left – Matt “Cat” Albers, his SMOKING HOT WIFE. Gives all fat/rich guys hope.
If you haven’t watched the wonderful 13th inning of the Sox/Mets game from last Wednesday, where 108’s fave Matt “El Nino” Albers starred, please do yourself a fuggin’ service and go back and watch it! In light of this virtuoso performance from El Nino, it has inspired me to write about 5 of my favorite overweight heroes
Don’t ever change.
5. Bartolo Colon – It’s cliche, but watching Colon do just about anything is like poetry in motion, he’s everything you want in a #fatthlete he looks weird and awkward doing athletic things, but he also has a sort of grace in doing them……..he makes you think that you could get off your couch and hit your first home run at Petco Park at age 43.
4. Aretha Franklin – An all-time great voice in music history, but she didn’t get the nickname “the Queen of SoulFood” for no reason. She made it okay for Ann Wilson to become as robust as she did and she laid the ground work for the future Kelly Clarkson’s and Adele’s of the world.
3. Buddha aka “Siddhartha Gautama” – If half of the world is following your teachings, your way of life, you are a major hero……………Buddha was a big boy, especially in his day…..now, he’d probably be your average Milwaukee Walmart shopper, but still brilliant and insightful……..and some great big ears as well.
In the end, maybe he needed it more than Walter.
2. William “the Refridgerator” Perry – Needs no introduction, he was the first high profile 300 pounder in the NFL………now, 20% of the league is pushing 300 pounds…….he had his own cheerleaders, he was in every commercial, he scored a touchdown in the SuperBowl………..facts are though, he was a fantastic athlete, I once saw him do a 2 hand dunk at a charity basketball game……Fridge was a freak, but belongs well up on this list.
Our very own MSS (looking well fed) with the Hedgehog.
1. Ron Jeremy – I am not sure how many of you have actually viewed an adult film, but those of you who have, Ron Jeremy is the first seriously fat male superstar in the trade. He’s also shown up in dozens of regular films, including prominently being featured in the Chase with Charlie Sheen (hard to believe they are friends)……
Feelings On MGD– Don’t drink beer, don’t care what they sell.
