You got me, I really just wanted to use the phrase “pure poppycock” and have a pic from Dodgeball.
But really, Pace of Play is a load of shit. In no way will shaving a few minutes off the game help you attract more fans. There are a number of problems with this theory but the biggest is that the NFL’s pace of play is worse and it gets monster ratings. The Wall Street Journal did some research on the amount of action and the length of games. If you’re too cheap to subscribe, like me, the summary can be found here. The research found that MLB games were just under 3 hours and had about 18 minutes of actual action. Football on the other hand, has game lengths of about 3 hrs and 10 minutes and anywhere between 11-17 minutes of action. So why is this not a problem for football and what can baseball do?
One of the great innovations of the NFL in recent years has been the RedZone channel. Yes, there is under 20 minutes of action in an NFL game, but if you add that up across 8 games at once, there is almost non-stop action. So without a rule change, you have introduced a way to have more action in your telecast. Contractually, this may be tough for baseball to pull off, but imagine if they could? In addition to having more action in a single night of baseball, you’d get all the hometown calls, which are another great part of baseball. Now MLB Network already does this a bit, and admittedly it is not as popular as RedZone and the next item might be why.
Fantasy Baseball is simply not as enjoyable as Fantasy Football. It’s not that the sport is somehow inferior, it’s that it does not work for the casual fan. Having to make daily updates and deal with more positions, more categories, and less players good across a number of them makes it more difficult to do. This cuts out your casual fans and lessens the viewership for games that don’t include their favorite team. You’ll see a lot of this as the Sox become terrible this year. So what can be done? Gambling. Rob Manfred has already softened MLB’s stance on this and it’s a smart move. The best way to bring in casual fans is to allow them to bet on games. Now to shift gears completely.
As kids play less and less Little League, baseball is going to have trouble teaching the rules of baseball to kids. People who say “baseball is so boring” tend to not understand the rules or the strategy of the game. Football, has this same issue, which gives baseball an opportunity to jump in and attract young viewers. One great way to do it, is to have interactive apps for baseball. Increasing spending in this arena could attract kids to watch more games and to have something interesting to do between pitches, assuming you don’t speed up the pace of play.
Good morning fam, although chief editor aka creative czar aka HNIC MySoxSummer warned us about writing about Avi Garcia again, FUCK HIM! I guess we’ll have to distract him with rare bobbleheads while we post this, because this has to happen……
I am not sure what is worse, that our RF weighed in at the END of a season at 268 lbs, or that losing 5% of that substantial weight is considered some sort of an accomplishment.
Here are a list of ways that fat people the horizontally challenged, can lose 5% of their body weight.
- Brushing Your Teeth
- Skipping the Chinese Buffet for lunch tomorrow
- Not using the motorized carts at WalMart
- A Bowel Movement
- Walking into White Castle instead of using the drive thru
- Meditating for 20 mins (theoretically you shouldn’t be stuffing your face)
- Stop using a Snickers bar to stir your coffee
- Using the steps to get on the bus instead of the lift
- Don’t use Strawberry Quik in your cereal
I’m starting to think that the White Sox propoganda machine is forcing this silliness into the ether, because it seems so stupid. Literally anything could be better to read than a guy who doesn’t wear shoulder pads to make his athletic living has SLIMMED DOWN to 254. Yikes.
I’m officially rooting for Rymer Liriano to take Avi Garcia’s spot, this is too much, I mean how much are we supposed to take from this underachieving, overeating former prospect.
Intentional Walk is now a dugout signal
Congratulations MLB! You’ve saved about 10 seconds per game. Sit back and watch the millennials flood in.
Intentional Walk is now a dugout signal
We’re never gonna see someone swing at an IBB pitch again. I don’t know about you, but that makes me sad.
Intentional Walk is now a dugout signal
A lot can happen in those 4 pitches: wild pitches, stolen bases, pickoff moves, and the oh so rare catcher balk. That’s all gone now, just more camera time for the handsome managers of the league.
Intentional Walk is now a dugout signal
The only possible outcome is more intentional walks, meaning less at bats for your stars and more for the guy who bats behind them. Way to bring in the fans!
Intentional Walk is now a dugout signal
Good day all, it’s your buddy BeefLoaf, why don’t you pour yourself a drink and get comfortable. I was enjoying an article at BP Southside by Mark Primiano about one of our favorite homegrown players, Nate Jones. The crux of the article is how great Nate Jones has been the last few years and how the value of high end relievers has been going up, up, up over the last several years. This value has reached a new creshendo this offseason with the contract that Aroldis Chapman signed with the New York Yankees. In the piece, Primiano points out how team friendly Jones’ contract is and how good he has been, leading to the conclusion that we as Sox fans should enjoy Jones while we can because he’s likely the best trade asset on the roster other than Jose Quintana. I have been thinking about this situation quite a bit and have a few caveats about this whole situation.
Given the recent arbitration decision on Dellin Betances and the fact that Andrew Miller is the only non-closer who has been given a big contract, in order to maximize Nate Jones outstanding trade value, he needs to earn his 9th inning participation trophy’s, commonly known in the modern era as “Saves”. The folks with the spreadsheets realize how damn valuable the Nate Joneses of the world are worth, but given that value and compensation don’t always match up this is a blind spot in the code, or, conquering the 9th inning (as arbitrary as some believe it to be) has this excess value that allows you to unlock a top 20 prospect. Regardless, the reason for this isn’t important to you and I as a White Sox fan looking for the best case scenario to gettting young controllable prospects in a rebuild. The best case for us is to figure out a way to pack David Robertson‘s bags and send him somewhere so that Nate Jones can take over the closer role (this, like my recent column about Quintana, show examples of why holding out for the most value on Q and DRob aren’t necessarily the best angles).
Jones will earn $900,000 in 2016, $1.9 million in ’17 and $3.95 million in ’18. The White Sox hold club options for ’19 ($4.65 million) and ’20 ($5.15 million), with a mutual option for ’21 ($6 million). If either club option is declined, Jones would receive a $1.25 million buyout.
This is an excellent contract, and definitely adds to his trade value, even if he can’t log enough saves before the deadline or the offseason or the 2018 deadline, etc. This is also a friendly enough deal that Jones could still be a White Sox on the next contender. Assuming 2017 is a disaster and 2018 is still pretty lousy, with the advanced age of some of the current prospect haul, you can expect a good chunk of the prospects/young players to finally be showing their wears in Bridgeport in 2019 and some of them should actually be good (set aside the fact that the free agent market after 2018 will be one of the best all-time, so if the White Sox are heading where we think they should be, they’ll be spending in it). That 2019 season, when the fog should start to lift and the White Sox should be an above average team, Jones makes $4.65 million, a mere pittance, if he’s your shutdown closer or realistically, even if he’s just as good as he is RIGHT. DAMN. NOW.
So, given all of this, you are probably sitting around wondering….”BeefLoaf, What say you?”……….I’ll be honest, I am not completely sure. On one hand, you’d think you would like to trade your bullpen pieces while the value of those pieces appears to be en vogue by the rest of the marketplace. These things ebb and flow, right now, right handed sluggers that can’t run or play defense are damn near worthless and bullpen arms are super valuable. A decade ago, those values were flipped, so you never know what will happen. On the other hand, assuming the perceived timeline of these White Sox is accurate, Nate Jones is your lead dog through the 2019-2021 seasons, which are the front end of the contending years. Theoretically, he’s leading a potentially excellent bullpen (with Zach Burdi and Carson Fulmer as two guys that project to be ++ back of the bullpen options). Think the 2015 Royals back end of the bullpen (that’s the best case scenario, and these guys are mostly still in the minors so don’t @ me).
I think my (substantial) gut is telling me that trading him makes the most sense. This system already contains a lot of arms that are going to be airing out high velocity fastballs and sliders and its exceedingly low on other stuff (namely middle of the order hitters). If I were a gambling man (AND I AM), I would be making my bets on Nate Jones (and David Robertson, ldo) being on other teams and the Zach Burdi’s and Carson Fulmer’s of the world being the back end of the bullpen when the 2020 White Sox are battling the Twins and Indians for the AL Central. What do you think? Should Nate stay or should he go? Let me know on twitter, facebook or in the comments below.
Growing up, my mother had direct access to golden box seats along the 3rd baseline at Comiskey Park. It enabled Chorizy-E, Beefloaf, and myself to attend many Sox games. We even got to see Jordan take BP with the Sox back in the day. Eventually Comiskey was demolished, and “New Comiskey” was built, but those Golden Box seats remained, just without the sweet yellow rails. 4th row behind the Sox dugout was still there for us.
Where I am going with this, is one of my fondest baseball memories. It was Spring of 91, our 7th grade year, and our impressionable middle school minds were about to be blown. Coming home that day from school, I knew I had one thing for homework, study for a Social Studies test. But upon arrival at home, I was given new plans, Sox vs Orioles on a Wednesday in April. I called Chorizy and Beefloaf, and we were set for the night. I’m not sure I need to state the obvious, but no studying was going to take place.
We showed up just before game time and just in time to see journeyman Charlie Hough trot in from the bullpen. It’s true that time waxes nostalgic, because I remember Hough being only 71 when he pitched for the Sox, but I digress. Going back to look at the box score, there are some O’s that I completely forgot about. Joe Orsulak was in left, and Dwight Evans and his sweet stance were in right. Brady Anderson had yet to start “swinging early” like Joey Bats, so his power wasn’t there. The Sox would lose 5-1, but that’s not the part we all remember fondly.
There were four college kids sitting directly behind us. They were definitely drunk, and definitely 108 material. I’d like to walk you through the greatness that was April 24, 1991.
The Sox take the field, which prompts one member of the group to exclaim, Fuck Tim Raines, he’s making $100 million dollars for nothing. That didn’t seem right, but we believed them. SN, he made about $14.5M. At that moment, Raines was the most overpaid athlete in all of sports.
Same inning, Anderson is on first, and the spry Hough shows us 3 different pickoff moves. Each move slower than the previous. I remember saying how could anyone get picked off by this old fuck? Well, throw #4 catches Anderson leaning, and we see a P-1B-2B CS. That may have been Hough’s only pickoff ever.
3rd Inning, and the college guys are more lubricated, and the 3rd one in is upset that the Orioles had just taken a 2-0 lead on a Joe Orsulak double. He exclaims that he needs outfielders with balls. In fact, he wants to buy himself a Ball State sweatshirt just so everyone knows that he has balls. Because of this, I owned a Ball State hoodie in college. I did not attend Ball State.
4th inning, and the O’s tack on 2 more. Hough is replaced by something called a Wayne Edwards. The college guys comment that Hough possibly died and that was why he was replaced. It seemed like a legitimate call, and we all believed them until we saw Hough pitch for the Marlin. Sure he pitched for the Sox again that year and next, but we just assumed it was a hologram like Tupac.
7th inning, the three of us were introduced to the gold standard, the four guys behind us made a beer run and came back with 4 apiece for the last 1/3rd of the game. (Thanks to mom for remembering this.) One member of the group behind us proceeds to tell the Pirate joke that has always stayed with us. Here it is in its entirety:
A new crewman comes aboard a pirate ship, and the captain shows up with a peg leg, a hook on his right hand, and a patch over one eye. The captain warns the new crewman of the dangers of being a pirate. The newbie asks the captain how he lost his leg. The captain replies ” argh, I was fighting a shark, and it bit my leg off before I could kill it.” The crewman then asks how he lost his hand, the captain replied “yargh, fishing line wrapped around my wrist and cut off my hand.” Jesus the crewman thought, well how did you lose your eye? The captain responded with “a bird shit in it.” The crewman said, bird shit wouldn’t take out your eye. The captain replies ” yarrrrrgh, it be the first day I had me hook.”
On the surface, an OK joke, but for all of us, it was comedic gold. So much so, that over 25 years later, I remember it all.
The Sox eventually scored a run in the ninth and the group behind us celebrated like it was the Pods walk off, but that was all the scoring that would happen. I looked back at the box score to see that it was none other than our fearless leader Robin Ventura who had the RBI. It also came to my attention that Donn Pall pitched the 9th. I’m sure he celebrated his scoreless 9th with some blow somewhere in the Bridgeport area.
The next day, we went back to our day job of school so we could take that SS test. Fun fact, both Beefloaf and I failed the test. Our teacher asked me if I had even studied, I replied with “No, but do you want to hear a great pirate joke?”
– Polish with Extra Onions
Good day fam, it’s your buddy BeefLoaf. I got rebuild on the brain (well that and booze….and Anna Nicole Smith…..the intoxicated, overfed version, ldo). The White Sox are doing the most obvious things in this rebuild (except trading Jose Quintana, which is giving me irritable bowel syndrome), but they haven’t gotten to the point where they do some things that really utilize their organizational strengths to create additional arbitrage opportunities for this rebuild. Then it hit me, TRADE THE SODFATHER!!
I know, it sounds crazy, because every Sox game you have ever attended, in which we get a little (or a lot) of rain. You know, those games where we are forced back into the concourse or up the ramps to take shelter (SN – Shout out to those hustling beer vendors that follow us up the ramps to take shelter and to sell us more beer, those are real life heroes). There is always one overserved Sox fan that offers the same refrain “Don’t Worry, the Sodfather will take care of this”. Roger Bossard is pretty much the biggest celebrity left on the “roster”. The man was high end landscaping royalty and basically born into the trade. He takes more interviews than most teams GMs. He’s an organizational advantage going back to the days when Ozzie and RV were manning the left side of the infield with excellent defense. Now, someone on his staff has to be able to pick up the pieces from here, making him tradeable. I have not run a model or anything to see how valuable a man of the Sodfather’s expertise would be worth (let’s be honest, I have no idea how to run such a model, otherwise I wouldn’t be writing columns at a 3rd grade reading level for some blog nobody reads). Regardless, let’s take our best guess and figure out what teams and what return makes the most sense for the man with the big hose.
Los Angeles Dodgers for Austin Barnes C
Andrew Friedman is a man that is known for taking advantage of any market inefficiency. It is very possible that he already has a high end grounds keeper that nobody even knows about, but when you can get the best, you get the best. With an oversized young SS and an aging 3B, it makes a lot of sense to have the Sodfather in tow to get the most out of their infield defense. I predict sort of a high grass arrangement (hey, California just legalized, so it is what is). Austin Barnes is an easy ask, because they have Grandal for the forseeable future and the free agent catcher market is pretty cheap, so it makes sense for all parties.
Oakland Athletics for Dakota Chalmers RHP
Another franchise that likes to win on the margins, and lately, they haven’t been winning anything, so maybe this is exactly what they need. A lot of people don’t remember, but the A’s let MC Hammer be their batboy after he went broke. This team knows how to squeeze out any bit of value they can from a situation. They also employ Marcus Semien at SS, so the Sodfather is going to have his work cut out for him. He might even mix some taffy into the infield dirt to help Semien pick up the ball, possibly some quicksand at the front edge to slow it down and maybe even a handful of bullfrogs in the grass on the left side just for aesthetics. Chalmers sounds like he could be some ex-porn stars son, but alas, he’s nothing more exciting than a guy who projects to be in someones bullpen some day. If that doesn’t get your motor running, nothing will.
Tampa Bay Rays for Casey Gillaspie 1B
I know the Rays have artificial turf, don’t sass me boy! The Sodfather can work around this, he’s the Wiz and nobody beats him! Anyway, I just imagine he could fashion amusing creations on the infield dirt that would keep the hundreds of Rays season ticket holders enthralled. It is possible there is a way to comb the artificial surface in a productive way, I bet it will keep Evan Longoria‘s defense in the plus side of the ledger well into his 30’s. Gillaspie is brothers with Conor Gillaspie, former White Sox 3B and current jovial gent. He’s supposed to be able to hit, a little bit, but most scouts think he doesn’t have a lot of power and he has to play 1B. Hey, they can’t all be winners!
I’m not sure if Jerry would allow any of this action, because as you all know, he’s very loyal and Bossard has been here for the long haul, but the more I think about it, the more I think the heads groundskeeper is basically a glorified janitor, so squeezing some value out of him has to happen!
Good day fam, it’s your buddy BeefLoaf and we have a fun offer from the 108. A good chunk of the 108ers are willing to gamble on just about anything, I kid you not, myself, Chorizy-E and Biguns will literally gamble on ANYTHING! Stop by the 108 with a proposition and we’ll figure out a price to gamble on it. You are probably asking, so what? Who gives a fk? What does this have to do with me?? Well, the 108 is putting together a pseudo gambling opportunity for you. We are running a Fantasy Baseball League that you can be involved in…..with prizes and more importantly consequences
The winners (if those people are non-108ers) will receive some of the following prizes………….
– An entire game in 2018 in which you and a friend will have their entire drink tab picked up by the 108 (vendor drinks only, we’re not sneaking in a case of Zima for you)
– sundry items created by the 108 (think t-shirts, as we have already created a couple of designs with more fun stuff to come this summer).
I know, this sounds great, it sounds like taking candy from a baby, but guess what, the 108ers will be actively battling you and here are your consequences for NOT being one of the winners
– Put up the 108 logo as your twitter picture for an entire month
– Do a 30 second facebook live video about how much you love the 108ers
In addition, we will talk monster shit about your awful team on social media from beginning to end of the season (even if you win this could happen)
Now if someone from the 108 finishes last, they will have to sport a mustache for a full week.
If someone from the 108 wins, the other 108ers have to buy $100 worth of churros for the section.
We’ll have room for approx 5 people to come play in this league and battle against myself, Chorizy-E, MySoxSummer and also 108 special guest SlimMick.
We also added a known non-108er and that is fellow WhiteSox blogger DJT.
In order to get an invite for the league, please DM us on twitter and give us a reason why we should choose you over others that might be interested.
The league is AL-Only, Head to Head, with playoffs……………..we’ll also have side bets and special things during the year to enhance the experience. Only one rule, everyone in the league must have at least 1 White Sox on their roster at all times. So get those fingers DMing us on twitter (sounds dirty) and let us know why you want to be in the league.
Good day fam, it’s your pal BeefLoaf. This is the time of year in which White Sox baseball is usually quiet on all fronts. With Sox Fest behind us and minutes from Pitchers and Catchers, I figured I would bring you an unconventional 5. A few days ago, I was interacting with some of White Sox Twitter and a few folks were aghast that “The Naked Gun” was being shown on MLB Network. They asked “Is this really a baseball movie?”. I answered, emphatically “YES” but I guess my definition varies from that of others, so I bring you, the 5 Baseball Movies that aren’t really Baseball Movies.
5. The Fan – I can’t blame you if you haven’t seen this movie, it’s pretty awful. But if you are interested in seeing Robert DeNiro play a really crazy guy, like much crazier than Travis Bickle, then you should check him out as Gil Renard. When he reunites with his former little league catcher it is a real HOME RUN. Also, “Bobby,…Do you care now Bobby?”
4. The Naked Gun – This is the movie that sparked the topic and features humor in the same vain as “Airplane”. “The Naked Gun” also features O.J. Simpson back when he was a nice, respectable white guy. Leslie Nielsen is the star, with Priscilla Presley as his love interest (fellas, she still has her fastball in this film) and mucho cameos throughout. It is a mystery to me why Reggie Jackson isn’t still in jail for trying to kill the Queen.
3. The Untouchables – The most famous movie on the list has only one basebally scene. It’s when Al Capone has all of his lieutenants around and gives a famous speech about his love for baseball and team play. Then he proceeds to bash in the head of one of his people. On balance the movie is fantastic. Kevin Costner (who is in most baseball movies) has top billing, but for me, Sean Connery and Andy Garcia steal the show.
2. My Blue Heaven – It stars Steve Martin, so obviously it’s great! Anyway, this movie has baseball in and around and through it, from Barney Coopersmith (Rick Moranis) being cuckold by Wally Bunting, a fictional (and failing) San Diego Padres relief pitcher to Vincent Antonelli aka Todd Wilkinson (Steve Martin) hiding his extortion ring by using the funds to build a new little league baseball field for the children of Fryburg. In the scene with Coopersmith and Bunting (whom Coopersmith’s wife is supposedly seeing professionally as a mental health care professional), Coopersmith tells him “Relief pitching, it’s a high risk occupation, anyone could give up a 7 run lead.” to which Bunting replies “8”. Sounds to me like he might have been part of the White Sox bullpen that pitched at Kaufman on May 28th 2016. This movie answers the question, “How many hotdogs do you want?” once and for all.
1. Life – If you haven’t already seen this star studded Eddie Murphy and Martin Lawrence comedy, do yourself a favor and catch it, but catch it with the cursing, without the cursing some of the jokes don’t get there. The quest for getting “Can’t Get Right”, yes, you read that correctly, that is a persons name, a contract with the Pittsburgh Crawfords of the Negro League to secure pardons from their life sentences is a major theme in the movie.
Hey, I see ya. I know you are trying to stay relevant, trying to capitalize on recent internet headlines. And you know what? You do you. Wanna know why? Cause us Sox fans, we are never satisfied. If there is a fanbase that can be accused of moving the goal posts more than the Sox fanbase, I’d like to see it. Confused?
Last week, I woke up to this little article from the Tribune, you can read it here.
White Sox ‘cash me ousside’ tweet falls flat with some fans.
I saw the reactions, a solid mix of good and bad, but to the ones saying this was done in bad taste, you are taking this shit too seriously. If a tweet makes you unfollow your baseball team, you gotta take a step back, have a real conversation with someone and reevaluate your social media life. This is entertainment, in a world where tweets go out every second, making an impact is a huge deal. And this did it’s job, it provoked responses.
Anytime a big company tries to capitalize on some flavor of the moment, it’s gonna get looked at as cheesy. Lame. Whatevs. But if the Sox Twitter was stale? People gonna bitch about that too. So it’s a no win. Trolls ain’t buying tickets, and most die-hard fans don’t know how to use Twitter anyways.
A question of marketing always seems to come up, mostly that the Sox don’t do it well. I disagree, I think they do an excellent job trying to appeal to many different bases. Problem is, especially this year, they don’t really have much star power to use right now. Abreu and Q. Frazier. But some of these young kids got it going on. Tim Anderson can be the next big thing, believe you me. He’s poised to make it happen. Just hope he doesn’t go the way of the Beckham. So they should be blasting him out this season if he does anything of value.
This new crop of youngsters has some pretty unique people in it. Carson “Filthy” Fulmer, dude is crazy nice. Zach Burdi, another guy who is just so frickin’ nice it makes you sick. Plus he’s from Downers Grove, so you gotta pull for the local guy right? I am high on Giolito and Moncada too, but the ace in the hole (as far as social media star power) is Michael Kopech.
Kopech dates Brielle Biermann, which I had to ask my wife if she knew who that was. Apparently she is the daughter of a reality star and is making a push to be one herself. Or she is one already, I don’t really know. All I know is that they made a big splash at SoxFest with the ladies. Kopech tosses in the 100’s and he dates a reality TV star. That’s huge. If we can’t capitalize on that to get some younger fans, I don’t know what to say. She (and he for that matter) don’t look bad.
So keep taking these risks, and market these new guys to us fans! You keep doing you, eff the haters. Hell, if we get a little reaction on a tweet we pop bottles. Honestly, we’d pop bottles anyways, but a few retweets is a great excuse for our wives.
Remember our contest with Tyler Saladino #southsidestachemen. Tweet those pics using that hashtag!