Who Cursed The White Sox?
Being a White Sox fan in the lord’s year of 2024 is walking through a desert you aren’t familiar with. The suffering has no near term end in sight and you may perish on this journey. Not to mention, with minor twitter skirmishes setting the table for the upcoming WST WARS, you aren’t even safe amongst your own people.
It wasn’t always like this. In fact on October 10, 2021 many of us were screaming, waving black towels and generally going ballistic at Sox Park celebrating the White Sox game 3 victory over the Houston Astros to make it a 2-1 series in the ALDS (Astros advantage).
LEURY. LEGEND. Whatta game. Whatta night. Folks, it’s been a treacherous sled ride down since that night. The White Sox would be summarily dismissed in Game 4 (two days later, after a rain out) and never sniff the playoffs again. 2022 would be an odd season. Rick Hahn never really added to the roster and it indeed reverted to 81-81 that year falling out of the playoff race in mid-September with losses at home to Cleveland (the eventual AL Central Champ).
2023 was supposed to be a NEW DAY with Tony La Russa having to move on due to health reasons and Rick Hahn, finally getting to pick his manager in Kansas City bench coach Pedro Grifol. Of course, that’s when the shit really hit the fan and nearly everything went wrong for our boys as they skidded to a 61-101 record and a negative 200 run differential.
Now with Hahn and Ken Williams 86’d from the joint and Chris Getz running things, it ain’t any better. A 3-22 start which has flowed into fans now rooting that the White Sox have the worst season in modern history. WHAT. THE. FUCK. HAPPENED???
The White Sox Gotta Be Cursed!!
I know the White Sox org (especially on the baseball operations side) has been less than optimal, but to think they were in the playoffs in back to back seasons as recently as 2020 & 2021 and to fall this got-damned far, it can’t just be inadequacy. There is something else at play. These muthafuckas….us muthafuckas, is cursed. But who the fuck would curse the White Sox? Below are my PRIME SUSPECTS.
Cane Guy
Look, Cane Guy dazzled in Game 3 of the ALDS (to some). Forcing his will onto the Astros and helping the White Sox win…..ALLEGEDLY. This folktale resonated so fucking much that not only did it become LEGEND in these parts, but the White Sox made a goddamn bobble head of this guy.
ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? Personally, I didn’t believe the Cane Guy magic at all. Old guys like that always have a magic ring or a magic cane or some bullshit that just allows them to fart in public and get away with it. If the thing was actually magic, you think they’d be hanging out with your dull ass? C’mon son! Anyways, I highly doubt it was this guy, despite the fact that some people do.
Btw, I have absolutely no idea how MSS got a Cane Guy bobble. None.
The Goose
A substantial portion of White Sox fandom think that the removal of the Goose Island Goose is a curse on the team. Before the start of the 2022 season, the White Sox ended their partnership with Goose Island (which also kinda ended the 108ers partnership with Goose Island) in favor of returning to Miller Coors. Fans had loved the many Goose Island beer offerings at the ballpark and especially in the Kraft Cave. As well as loving “The Goose Island” which was a bar area in the right field corner near 108 that allowed fans to gather and hang out up top with a great viewpoint of the action. This included the section below having specially priced seating with wait staff and creature comforts such as televisions and phone chargers.
Unfortunately, those good times ended before the 2022 season. Summarily with the White Sox team’s good times. Was it the Goose? Maybe. This one has some legs to it imo. Let’s see what else we got.
Aussie Sox Fan
The story of Aussie Sox Fan is a piece of White Sox twitter LORE. To get the full gravity of it, you need to have been there at that time and place. Or you need to ask one of the elders, however it culminated with the cliff notes HERE. Would this guy, who was the biggest fucking fan of Liam Hendriks and one of the biggest White Sox fans I can remember (driving in from across state lines to watch the team), really curse the White Sox? Self-destructive. Maybe. Vindictive? Huh.
I do know he was spotted at the ballpark a couple of times in 2022. Did he come back for revenge? Did Liam’s illness and subsequent injury send him over the edge? Hmmm…
Andy Masur
Way, way back in the pandemic season of 2020, after the untimely death of White Sox radio legend Ed Farmer, this man got the job to replace him sitting next to Darrin Jackson. Andy Masur is a local guy, long-time radio personality, finally getting his fucking shot to move up from pre and post game host up to the play by play spot. And goddamnit if the man wasn’t pretty good. I know for me personally, he was the artist painting the picture of many White Sox wins that year when my only salvation was to retreat to my back yard with a beverage and sit in the sun. Fucking Pandemic.
Regardless, if anyone has big motives, it would be Andy. After the 2020 season, Len Kasper shockingly left the Cubs and came straight for Andy’s got-damned job as the radio play-by-play guy and Andy was gone. Brutal turn of events for a guy who did a good job under less than optimal circumstance. I wonder if he has a Len Kasper voodoo doll at home. Thieving Len’s red hair would be a real caper imo. DID YOU DO THIS ANDY? TELL ME!
The 108 Intern Program
I feel like, we, the 108ers have done a lot of cool things over the years. We created a highly rated and critically acclaimed Hot Tub Sports Show called the Sunday Soak. We invented #108ing. The #108Tourney has become a fan favorite…I’m sure there are others, but I can’t remember right now.
Anywho, one thing we haven’t been great at is hiring some help to compliment our current work. The 108 Intern Program was born, then died, then sorta reborn and once again dead. We just can’t make it work. I’d like to think we are easy guys to work with, but maybe not. We do have a certain way about us and building community is tough unless you do it the way we do it, so maybe we ain’t such good bosses. Maybe people just want clout and don’t really want to build community. I dunno.
But this would be like one of those mistake curses. Like, we let our goofy intern genie out of the bottle and we don’t know how to get it back in. It’s possible MySoxSummer must host a reality show style search for our next intern to end this fucking curse. I know the program is CURSED. Hopefully it hasn’t latched on to the team.
So there you have it, some possibilities as to how the White Sox might be cursed. Got your own theories? Holler at me in the comments or on twitter. We need to figure this out asap as possible and get the White Sox back on the right track. We know for sure Jerry can’t do it alone.
-BeefLoaf
About The Author
beefloaf108
Low information White Sox Fan. Big Feet Energy ORIGINAL 108er Like Whore 2019 Opening Day #SoxMath WINNAR Mediocrity Personified