Bandwagon Cubs Fans, Repent!

Folks, its your old buddy BeefLoaf…………this is a special post, a playoff baseball post.  This is a post that should help you and more importantly, your Cubs fan friends, enjoy baseball this time of year.  A recent series of discussions between the 108ers helped us identify that most of OUR friends that claim their fandom to the Northside team, are very, very casual fans and few, if any, actually attended, or even so much as watched or listened to games during their extended hiatus from playoff baseball.  Now, this isn’t a sin in the biblical sense, but it is a sin of fandom if you intend to sport your Cubbie blue all over the goddamn place and choose to be obnoxious to your fellow Southsider that has been living and dying with an awful team for 8 years.  So upon further review (no worries, Mike Carey isn’t advising us), I decided to create a list of things that the bandwagon Cubs fans can do to repent and feel full enjoyment for this current playoff run.  White Sox fans, please pass this list on to your Cubs fan friends and together we can live in harmony, like ebony and ivory.
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Re-embrace Sammy Sosa………..I’m tired of it, as Cubs fans, you love Sammy Sosa, so I want you to bring him back in to your life….I think hanging an 8×11 photo of him in your den should do the trick.  Extra credit for hanging a picture of “White” Sammy Sosa
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Buy an old school shirsey………….I’d suggest EITHER something from your childhood, whatever era that might be (I’m in my late 30’s so a Manny Trillo shirsey might be fun)………..OR a guy that none of the other bandwagon fans know who the fuck they are…….like 2012 All Star Bryan LaHair
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Drink nothing but Old Style for an entire playoff game.  It used to be the main beer at the park on Sheffield and Addison, so go nostalgic and knock back some Old Style
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Rewatch Glenallen Hill’s May 11, 2000 monster fucking home run.  It’s seriously the longest fucking home run I have ever seen (I don’t care what the record books say).  And it’s so easy to find in the YouTube era, so go check it out.  If it is your first time viewing it, please watch it in private, because it’s NSFW
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7wDrw76ieTs
Adopt some vintage Cubs styles to your personal ensemble……I’ll leave this to your imagination, but a couple of things that would really endear you to the hard core Cubs fans and your White Sox brethren as well would be getting a perm like 80’s closer Lee Smith, or possibly an I ❤️ Sandy Sandberg tattoo, you know, something really classy
Say it out loud, so all can hear…”FUCK RYAN DEMPSTER AND HIS STUPID FUCKING IMPRESSION OF WILL FARRELL DOING HARRY CARAY!!!!” We all know this sucks, and I’m still not sure why this is allowed to be on TV.  You’ll be considered part of the die-hards if you say this blows

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Make sure others know that you blame Alex Gonzalez and Dusty Baker’s over usage of Mark Prior in game 2, for the 2003 team’s NLCS collapse, and NOT Steve Bartman.
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Create a macaroni statue of your favorite current player or coach, I’d suggest Chris Bosio as it would take the most possible macaroni of any person in the dugout.   Don’t let him near your statue though, I doubt he could resist, as it appears his self control around the table is in question.
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Get into a bar fight with Kyle Farnsworth.  To be honest, most of you  have probably already done this, or if you are woman, you have been sloppily hit on by him, so this is probably the least necessary one on the list, but I’ll leave it on here for those that were incarcerated or underage during those years.

Godspeed.

 – BeefLoaf

The 5 – Keep it local – By MySoxSummer

Welcome to a little slice of Sox-cusssion we like to call The 5. When we think of 5 reasons to write about something, we will. If you think of something you’d like us to write about tweet it to us @fromthe108 using the hashtag #thesox5.  Don’t have Twitter, leave us a message below in the comments. Or hell, we are on the Facebook here, send us a message there too!

Keep it local.  We hear that a lot.  We think that means fresh, exciting, local.  We think we are supporting people that live in our communities and in most cases we are.  There are a few areas in the ballpark where a local product is being used and it is a far superior than what was there before.

Pizza – In 2012 they had DiGiorno. I heard that before that they had Connie’s, which makes perfect sense being in Chicago. I think the Cubs carried Gino’s for awhile.  But it always broke my heart that in Chicago, in our ballparks, we were serving frozen pizza.  WTF. Never ,under any circumstance, was I going to eat a damn slice of frozen pizza. Nothing against the pizza, it is plenty fine when I am drunk or really hungry and lazy, but when I am a short walk from Fabulous Freddie’s, I will stick to the classics. But then, the Sox announced in 2014 the switch to a Chicago favorite, Beggars.  That stuff is great, and it is very easy to carry 4 or 5 slices back to your buds on a Friday game.  BeefLoaf is convinced that if there was a guy walking around selling pizza, it would do awesome.  But he’ll talk about that later.

Beer – The Sox have always had a great selection of beers available at the park.  I admire that. I still drink (at the games) mostly Miller Lite, but having the option to have a Summer Shandy or Blue Moon is great.  But last season they did the unthinkable, they added in Chicago’s Revolution Brewery Anti-Hero IPA and Lagunitas IPA, ON DRAFT.I think they cost $10.75 for a 24oz beer, which I am sure has you like nah, but what if I told you it is the best deal (per ounce and in alcohol content) in the park.  It is actually cheaper than Miller Lite, and has more alcohol.  Miller Lite is $8 for 16oz, so 50¢ an ounce.  But with the Lagunitas and Anti-Hero you pay just 45¢ per ounce. It makes cents.  I talked to the food and beverage guy at SoxFest ’16 and he wasn’t sure that deal or the beer would be back.  Not sure we’d have the drafts from the local guys, which in all honesty, bums me the F out.

So there are two great examples of local being better.  Here is one more area that we think the Sox could make the game day experience even more localized.

Intro Music. 

Years and years the sounds of Australia’s own AC/DC welcomed our boys on the field.  Last year, the sounds of Fall Out Boy THEN AC/DC did the job.  Fall Out Boy has some local ties, but damn, not my bag. The song makes sense too, “Light It Up”, yeah we all get it, but nothing about FOB speaks to Sox fans.  AC/DC did and does ring true to the Southside. So who local can we play to get that same vibe?  Here our our top 5 selections.

1. “High-Fiving MF” – Local H.

If you haven’t heard this song, do yourself a favor and listen to it now.  Turn it up too. Local H is from Zion, IL and my god do they rock.  This song just get’s ya amped up.  For reals.  Even play the instrumental version (lots of swears) at the game, so much better than FOB.

2. “Good Ass Intro” – Chance The Rapper.

Chance. Dude is the real deal.  Local product. Local flavor. Loves the Sox. Reps the Sox. Can’t think of a better rapper to watch our boys run onto the field to.

3. “Seether” – Veruca Salt.

Chicks that rock. Still rock. Their album American Thighs still hits as hard as it did back in the day.

4. “N.W.O.” – Ministry.

Just because this kicks off a little harder than “Jesus Built My Hotrod” I choose “N.W.O.” I used to rock out to this as a high schooler back in the day too, blaring this CD (or a tape copy that was made from this CD) in my ’81 Chevette with the Realistic tape deck and Realistic speakers. Rocked then and it rocks now. Does it get ya ready to play some baseball? Hell yes.  It’s mean. It’s raw. It’s local.

5. “Cherub Rock” – Smashing Pumpkins.

A great intro song on one of the best albums of the 90’s.  I saw the Smashing Pumpkins so many times in my youth, it was really awesome. This song would be great at high volume at the park, while we watch the highlights of yesteryear. Remembering when the Pumpkins (and the Sox) were great.

So there you have it, 5 songs that are a far better intro song than Fall Out Boy. Don’t like it?  Hate tweet me at @fromthe108.  Do it. Think I missed something?  Send me a tweet. Just do it. Love it?  Share it with your Sox friends.  We love attention, so share the f outta this.  Share away!

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-MySoxSummer