Josh Nelson Will Beat Me in the Steak Dinner Bet and These White Sox Owe Me Part of the Bill

Whatta smug fucking grin! Full disclosure, I have an unfinished blog that I might never post that goes into great detail how I calculated the Steak Dinner Bet OVER / UNDER – White Sox Runs Allowed in 2024 at 818.5. It would’ve been a fun blog, but then work, then crappy White Sox, then more work and more crappy White Sox deterred me from finishing it and here we are, staring down the barrel of the final two months of the worst season in team history…possibly league history. Oh and I am likely going to owe my good buddy Josh Nelson a steak dinner.

Currently the the White Sox have given up 570 runs across 111 games, which pencils out to 5.14 runs per game, and is on pace for 832 runs allowed over 162 games played. This would have me beaten solidly as it scoots past 818.5 with little worry of a late season game cancellation to push the games played number down. So with two months left, I am a prohibitive under dog. And with that, there are some muthafuckas that contributed to this shit more than others and they owe me the ‘Loaf a few sheckels towards this bill.

Let’s Figure Out How the STEAK DINNER Will Shake Out

Since it’s winner’s choice and my mans been talking about Bavette’s for the entirety of this year’s wager, I’ll guess there first. Btw, if any of yous have “a guy” (or gal) at Bavette’s and can get us a reservation that doesn’t require us to eat with the blue hairs or the club goers, please hook a brother up!!!

Now above is the appetizers and salads. If Imma ballpark this bill, we gotta through the whole process and project the meal. For Appetizers, we generally got a couple two tree on the table to get going. I’m a Shrimp Cocktail guy, that’s definitely in, I could see Nelson adding the Baked Goat Cheese and the Baked Crab Cake to round out our appetizers. Neither of us are likely to add a salad to this, so I think we got an idea where this portion of the meal prices out.

Now for the meat and sides….

I’ll take a guess that Nelson goes Bone-In NY Strip. That’s a sophisticated order. I’m 100% going Classic Ribeye Chicago Cut for my meat. That’s a fake tough guy order. The Sides can be unpredictable, but I’ll say we end up with Mushrooms. There will be at least one starch, probably Mashed Potatoes. If I know Josh, he’ll throw a wild card in there like Elote Style Corn or something. So now we pretty much got the main meal locked down.

Last but not least, let’s look at the goddamn bar bill. Lucky for me, my date isn’t into wine. That could make the bill go sky high. He’s not likely to rake me over the coals for the Joseph Phelps Insignia or something like that. However, cocktails have gotten pretty goddamn expensive in their own right these days, so maybe it’s not going to be as light an expenditure as I anticipate.

I’m apt to go mostly Martini. Probably a Cosmo to start, and then a couple Dirty’s with Blue Cheese Olives for the meal. Nelson probably goes at least one old fashion and then possibly a couple of the classic cocktails. Not sure exactly where he’ll go, maybe Sazerac and Lion’s Tail. Let’s assume those for now.

That puts us at $390, before tip….BUT WAIT….fucking Dessert!

I hope Josh goes with the Hot Fudge Sundae Royale, just for the potential for him to go all Costanza on that bad boy. I’m not much for dessert usually, but I’ll likely get an Espresso Martini.

That pushes the bill to $428, now your boy the ‘Loaf is generally a decent tipper. Let’s say I trow a 25% tip on that bad boy. We are at $535 for STEAK DINNER BOOM!

Now let’s figure out which White Sox need to kick in on this fucking bill….

The Following White Sox Owe Me For the Steak Dinner Bill

When I starting piecing this blog together, it was based on one man and one man only that I felt owed me. That man is Michael Kopech. You know all about the weird balks, the 8 losses in relief and the blown saves. Just thinking about the times he gave up the tying run, so that the White Sox opponent could add on a couple tree runs in extras to really bury me in this bet. Michael is also dead last in WPA+ (Win Probability Added), which not only tanks your record, but in the process makes me the financial supporter of significant Steak Purchases. Eye-ballin’ it, Mike owes me a C-Note and a half, that’s right $150. Hit my CashApp at GILFDADDY6969.

Next up, and sorry to stay on the Mike’s but it’s big daddy Michael Soroka. He was my sleeper pick coming into the season, but as you well know, that didn’t happen. If there was a stat called “NON-QUALITY STARTERS” I think he would’ve been the leader early in the season. If someone in the rotation was gonna get blowed up, it was him. Since he recovered a little bit as a reliever, he only owes $50. And don’t try to pay me in Canadian money motherfucker!

I know I just tried to give the skipper some sympathy via tweet and blog, but he’s on the hook here too. I don’t think he’s the worst I have ever seen managing a bullpen, but I wouldn’t necessarily call him good at it either. His choices to play Gavin Sheets and his horrendous glove in RF so much definitely hurt the cause. I’ll charge Pedro Grifol $50. That’s probably light, but I’m in a good mood today as I start my vacation.

Last but not least is Chris Getz. This is the guy that touted how improved the White Sox would be on Defense in 2024. Now I know better than to believe a White Sox GM when they tell me basically anything, but when Mike Petriello had an article before the season predicting they would have a TOP 10 DEFENSE. I bought it. That definitely effected the pricing here. In the end, the White Sox are last on defense once again. Getzy has got to pick up all the drinks imo. That’s $115.

In the end, I have recouped $315 of the $535 I expect to spend, maybe I’ll tip 30% if all of these dudes get me paid by the time of the dinner, which if they keep going like this, might be around the time they notch loss 120. The fun never ends….

-BeefLoaf