The one thing that will fix Codi Heuer

The White Sox pulled out a close contest today against the lowly Pittsburgh Pirates. Thank goodness too, as White Sox twitter is about at their wits end watching lousy, dead-ass performances from this team. The wait for players back from the infirmary or better yet additions in the trade market has almost magnified the effects. The idea that we have a damn good team, but it is just not good for the time being, is brutal.

One part of the team that is surprisingly not up to snuff is the bullpen and one guy in particular is BeefLoaf Fave, Codi Heuer. Below is his line today.

That’s not great. Heuer was a YUGE part of the 2020 White Sox bullpen, summarily coming out of nowhere to really impact that back end of the pen a year ago. My infatuation with Heuer was pretty instant, but I gotta say that it really got sticky (there is a lot of talk of sticky stuff these days, so why not?) when I was discussing him on the FromThe108 podcast last year and I misspoke and instead of pronouncing the soon to be 25 year old righties name properly, I uttered the word “WHORE”, but more like Ralph Cifaretto from the seminal television series the Sopranos might annunciate it.

This is Ralph Cifaretto and a picture that I often tweet when Codi enters the game

Normally, this kinda thing blows over and becomes nothing, because god knows people misspeak on podcasts constantly and it never ends up being anything. But, because my partners are really great at landing a bit and making a bit sticky, and because the 108 audience loves to body me at every turn. It became a thing.

This shit got enough traction that Codi really started to become one of my faves, and with each 2020 performance where he mowed down hitters and started looking more and more like a future closer, the more real it felt. Coming into the 2021 season, the White Sox bullpen was considered a real strength with Codi one of the pillars. Then….

Maybe I was #108ing too much

Yea, I definitely was, but it was FromThe108 podcast night and after we were done recording, I am usually much too #108ed and wound up to go to sleep. Usually I stay up awhile, listening to music, indulging in second dinner and occasionally peppering the twitterverse with some of my more refined theories. That night, I decided to try this one on for size.

Nothing will ever come of this.

FUCK YES!!! We are now part of team Heuer (pronounced WHO-ARE). We are going to make him a big twitter following just outta sheer will (and the 108’s very friendly and cool fanbase).

Well, that ended quickly.

I get it, I assume most people who do follow me either mute me or quickly regret it, given the partial nudes, the poor grammar and often times tweets with missing words. Totally understandable.

You’ll never believe what happened next

Now I’m not being a poor sport. I still love watching Codi and wish him well, but you can see below the stats from pre-unfollowing me and post-unfollowing me. (I noticed the unfollow on or around March 4, 2021).

BIG DIFFERENCE! Now, I’m not a pitch whisperer like Rick Giolito claims Ethan Katz is, nor am I going to make up some bullshit on twitter and claim it’s a good fix like dear friend of the 108, White Sox Dave.

My solution is simple. Codi, if you are out there reading this, just come back! Follow me back!! We’ll be a team again and you’ll be great just like we all you want you to be. The 2021 White Sox needs the real Codi Heuer back. Take one for the team and re-join TEAM BEEFLOAF.

-BeefLoaf

Leave a Reply