The 5 – Chorizy-E’s initial thoughts on Tony LaRussa

The White Sox have hired Tony LaRussa to manage the team in 2021. While we’ll expound on this further in the coming weeks and months, I wanted to do a brain dump of my initial thoughts. What better format than to give you the first 5 things I thought of:

The Lineup Card

In 1998 Tony LaRussa started batting his pitcher 8th, which hadn’t been done in like 20 years. Articles were written, children cried, people fainted. But in the end, it had minimal effect if any. However, this is the kind of outside the box thinking the 108 crew loves. But more importantly WhiteSoxTwitter’s Lineup Task Force will absolutely hate shit like this. So I assume I’ll be entertained all year.

PED SZN

I don’t know if there is a person more entwined in the steroid era than LaRussa. Both at the beginning of the story with the Bash Brothers and then a reunion, during its peak, with the kid who mumbled sorry about doing steroids in Long Gone Summer. As you know, I’m not a big McGwire fan, so I’m not proposing him as a hitting coach. But please, please, please hire Jose Canseco in some capacity. If you ever wanted to post that Randy Marsh pic at both me and KenWO, this would be the time. Every player on the Sox puts on 20 lbs by opening day and they hit 150 more HR than the Twins.

You’re Ageist

The only reason you don’t like LaRussa is because he’s old af. Dusty Baker is 137 and he took the Astros one game from the super spreader event that was the World Series. Not to mention Tony’s racked up 3 WS Championships and 4 Manager of the Year awards. Should be the resume you want. Wait there is another reason you don’t like him? Oh yeah, this ain’t a good look:

To be serious for a moment, this does seem like a problem, especially when one of your best players is black and I think a bunch of us are hoping one of our starting pitchers will be as well. They should get in front of this immediately. Instead, I assume we’ll get a Nightengale article about how LaRussa is Bauer’s father’s brother’s nephew’s cousin’s former roommate.

He hasn’t managed since 2011

To me, this is a problem. Now, he has still been involved in baseball operations, so it’s not like he’s been on a beach not paying attention. He’s likely had access to plenty of analytics and information that we simply have not. But did he absorb that? Will he still be able to execute at the level he did 10 years prior? I don’t know. What I do know is that I don’t want to hear this complaint from any of you that have been pining for Ozzie to come back since he last managed in 2012.

The 108 Effect

A few years ago, what team would have thought to hire an old drunk? No team. It would have been unheard of! But now, the team with the most access and analytics on Section 108 have looked to the end of the bar and found a guy drinking Pinot Noir out of a pint glass.

At the end of the day, I think LaRussa is a safe choice. He probably won’t fuck up gloriously, but he also won’t revolutionize anything at this point in his career. Maybe that’s exactly what they’re looking for. Maybe players want to come to play for a manager that was a big deal when their parents were growing up watching the game. Maybe he’ll continue his ability to win in the playoffs. Maybe he’ll drink in the dugout. I simply don’t know. But I ain’t worried and I ain’t excited. The game is won by the players, so go fill the roster with some good free agents and let T-Bone ride them to glory.

-Chorizy-E