Opening Day GRIPE Predictions. By My Sox Summer

Sox fans like to complain.  Every year on a certain message board you’d see a thread the day after opening day about all the complaints. “They changed the music!”  “Beer price is higher than last year!” “Why did the guy from Journey throw the opening pitch?” “LINES” “WORKERS” “BATHROOMS” “BUN WAS STALE”. You get where I am going.  So I am gonna predict things that we all will be bitching about the Monday after opening weekend.

Locks-

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1- WEATHER – Sox can’t control that, not yet anyways. We’re all in this together. Drink more and deal with it.  (That said weather might keep people away so maybe we won’t bitch about the next thing)

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2- LINES AS FAR AS THE EYE CAN SEE – We all will bitch about the lines because we expect 40k people to stick to lines and to be ready when they get to the metal detectors.  So take you goddamn keys outta your pockets you drunk asses so we can watch the whole intro this year.  Guess what?  People are gonna want food and drinks too.  Guess what? They will all want them when the Sox are in the field.  Waiting till the 3rd, yeah, we all do that.  Drinking the amounts that we drink, we also piss.  A lot.  So expect lines.  Don’t go to the bathroom at the last minute, give yourself time.  And Sox, every year it seems like you forget that the game usually sells out for Opening Day.  Act like it.  SoxFest this year (opening ceremony on Friday) was a mess.  You can’t blame people for not following rules that you don’t enforce. You can’t blame the fans for lines (other than the jackwagons I mentioned above who ALWAYS forget their goddamn keys!).  I am hoping things go smooth, but expecting the worst.

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3- PRICES – Yep, it’s expensive to go to a game.  Nope, we don’t wanna hear about it.  I went to a movie, got some snacks, got a drink, I dropped $75 for the two of us.  Plus we paid $14 to park.  Tell me more about how it is unfair they charge $20 to park when you can get a ticket for under $10.  Especially if you come with a group.  $5 a person to park, $7 a ticket, $12 just to get in.  Seems like a swell deal to me. Plus the game might be better than the Steve Jobs Biopic that I am still pissed I spent actual money on.

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4- THE INTRO SUCKS – More than likely it will.  Guess what?  If you are reading this you are more than likely a fan, which is short for fanatic.  We are the die hards.  We will go to the game even when they suck.  WE ARE NOT THE TARGET AUDIENCE. Once we cross from “casual” fan to “reading (or writing) blogs about the team on a daily basis” fan they won.  They got us.  They switch shit up to attract a new fan base.  One that has other clothing besides Sox related items.  Hell, BeefLoaf has a shirt that no one outside of 35th and Shields would even understand.  I am a fan and I didn’t get it.  Dude is hardcore about his shirts.  We both live in the hood too, so like it or not we’ll be there till we die or move to the ‘burbs. So if a dumbass intro attracts a new base that will bring in more revenue and excitement, by all means play Fall Out Boy.

I see the Sox hired Chance The Rapper as a “consultant”, ABOUT F’N TIME. Dude is from here and rocks the Sox hat ALL THE F’N TIME. Plus he makes music that MILLIONS like.  Dude was on SNL, what TV show were you on?

Think of Opening Day like a first date for the Sox.  They pull out all the bells and whistles for that new girl. It’s only 3 months later that you realize that you got involved with a crazy person!  That is when you see the Sox true colors.  Hell, one Monday last year I was WAITING in a line with less than 10k at the game.  That is just pathetic.  But ya know what?  I like cheap tickets and I like cost effective food and drinks.  I will put up with a little hassle to keep that game going.  ONE TIP – If I see you yelling at staff for an issue that is beyond their control I will say something.  These people do a shit job, for shit pay and don’t need to take your shit too.  Take a boxing class to get out your aggression, don’t yell at a person making minimum wage, working far too hard for it,  especially when they aren’t given the tools to achieve perfection.  You do this to my favorite italian beef ladies (Evelyn and crew) I will smack ya.  Those ladies are lovely.

Here are the odd balls.

5- JOHN DANKS PITCHING – If he would have pitched in Oakland, and we got Sale on Friday, some would be happy.  Others would say that we should have used the actual rotation that we are gonna use for the whole year and F those guys who only show up on Opening Day expecting to see the best pitcher we have.  Look at it like this, John Danks will be gone someday.  Let the guy have his moment this year.  It’s just 1 of 162 games.  Come back Saturday to see Sale and get that sweet hat they are giving away.

6 – SCOREBOARD IS TOO BIG / TOO LOUD – For years we have bitched and bitched about the scoreboard screen being small.  Guess what?  THE WHOLE EFF’N THING IS A SCREEN NOW.  Guess what?  People are gonna miss the old school look.  It’s gonna happen.  We’ll complain because deep down we know we don’t deserve this marvel of electronics.  But we do friends, we do.  I am hoping for lasers.

7 – INTRO SONGS IN SPANISH – Guess what?  Most of the guys on the field DON’T SPEAK ENGLISH. Take it easy Trump, they PAY THEIR TAXES, but they don’t know the language. I for one don’t give a shizz if they do or don’t, as long as they can hit the ball a country mile. The world extends beyond the suburbs, trust me.  Many people in the world don’t speak English, but they are really good blokes.  So enjoy the popular music of Cuba or the DR, and sip a Corona from a can.  It might warm ya up.  Who knows?

8 – SO AND SO DIDN’T SIGN MY BLAH, BLAH, BLAH – When the crowd is smaller on Sunday, you will have the autograph hounds out there.  You know, when I am trying to get focused at work, I love to sign multiple items for grown ass men and women who maybe in turn will sell it on Ebay.  That is how I get focused.  So give these guys a break, buy an autograph if you want one.

9- PEOPLE WILL JUST BITCH ABOUT HOW IT USED TO BE AND HOW IT WAS BETTER  – That’s it. Can’t argue with this people.

Nine is my favorite number so I am gonna end here. I could go for days, but I won’t bore you with my rants today, I will save them for a video some day.  See you Friday, Saturday AND Sunday.  Unless my wife goes into labor, then you will only see me Friday and Saturday. Can’t miss Sale’s first start.

– MSS #99

The 5. Haterade. By Polish with Extra Onions

 

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This isn’t about you.

OK, I could sit here and talk about the 5 worst seasons ever by a White Sox player. I could reference Adam Dunn, I could go in on Scottie Fletcher’s 1990 season which was an absolute shit sandwich, but none of those actually draw out my hatred. The list you are about to read is a list of 5 players who I hate. You may not hate these 5 players, but there is absolutely no way that you actually liked these 5 players. Without further ado, here is the list of 5:

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Too easy.

5) Billy Koch: If by his 3rd week as our closer you did not pronounce the “ch” as a “ck”, I’m not sure you were watching White Sox baseball. He was a lockdown closer in Oakland, and had a triple digit fastball. What could possibly go wrong? Coming over to the Sox in a trade where we dumped Keith Foulke, I had this joyous feeling. Basically, it was a “My closer is a badass who throws 100 f’ing miles per hour” feeling, but a feeling nonetheless. What did that feeling get us? A 5.66 ERA, a 5.34 FIP, and a -.9 WAR. Oh, let us not forget the $10,000,000 salary that he was earning. The salary part doesn’t bother me that much. Teams pay what they think a player is worth, but this was just a cherry on the top for me. I was young, in college, and could not comprehend how this shit storm was out here every save opportunity. Did I mention that Keith Foulke went on to be much better, with a 2.06 ERA, and a 4.09 FIP. Did I mention that he didn’t suck?

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“Oh man. Why Polish with Extra Onions? Why you gotta be so cruel? “

Polish with Extra Onions

4) This one for me is actually a little bit painful. I was born in 1978, and had access to golden box seats growing up. My favorite player was Harold Baines. I was a righty hitter, but went to extreme lengths to try and mimic Harold’s batting stance and swing. As a tee baller, I thought that if I could just hit lefty like Harold, I could dominate the Donovan Park circuit. This is why it pains me to put him here. Now, this is not 1980-1989, nor 96,97 Harold Baines that I am talking about. I am talking about 2000-2001 Harold. I can vividly remember a game where he got a double, and thinking he should retire and ask for the ball, because it isn’t going to get any better that that. Harold had a -.3 and a -1.2 WAR during this span. What is most astounding is that he had a negative defensive WAR. I don’t even think he had a glove anymore when he came back to the Southside, but that may have been the problem. This was the hardest thing for me to write, but I feel that this has cleansed my soul. I will preach on!!!!!

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That ball isn’t going where you’s expect.

3) Mike Caruso: These kids can play!!!!! No they f’ing can’t. Mike gave us a glimmer of hope during his first season with the Pale Hose. He gave us a +2.7 WAR, a .721 OPS and received ROY votes. Overall, it was an impressive one year resume. On the other hand, we should have seen the signs coming. He tailed off defensively at the end of year one, and his September BABIP was only .248. But we had hope. Mike was going to solidify our SS position for years to come. Then year two came along. Mr. Caruso had a -1.6 WAR and a 47 OPS +. I am pretty sure that the Babe could do that right now. Yes, I know that he is dead, but prove me wrong. His second year was like a terrible car crash. You didn’t want to watch it anymore, but you also couldn’t turn of the television. There were errors, there were terrible at bats, but there was also hope that he could regain form. That was a whole bunch of hate piled into 2 years. In my defense though, those 2 years really seemed like 7.

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Douche? Yup.

2) Dye with the catch, Swish with the worm!!!! Mercy!!!!! Hawk, you get a pass for this, but let’s be honest, Nick Swisher’s tenure with the Sox was so awful. Before I break into my hatred, let me give him a little credit. Swish was playing out of position from day one. When you trade for a corner OF from Oakland, and think you can put him in CF at the Cell, you are not exactly setting someone up for success, but I digress. At first, his Captain Morgan celebration was cute, and catchy, but when you hit an abysmal .219 with an OBP of .332 you are not really allowed to celebrate or complain. I think the fact that it was always someone else’s fault when he struggled is what really amped up my hatred. A -.2 WAR is no one’s fault but your own. But there was Bromontana Swisher blaming Ozzie, blaming the media, blaming the clubhouse. Then of course, he leaves the South Side, and gives the Yankees an 11.5 WAR. He still had the douchey attitude, but it is easier to swallow when he is performing. And just to throw a little icing on the cake, we sent Gio Gonzalez to Oakland to get Nick Swisher. Yeah, that is bad.

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“I fucking won!”

This man is the crème de la crème. He was a utility player that was supposed to be a reserve, but was thrust into the starting lineup because Brian Anderson was supposed to be the next big thing. Brian was one of the best defenders that I can recall, but he could not hit a fastball. You know, the ball that goes straight. That isn’t good for a Major League player. Number 1 with a bullet is Rob Mackowiak. Now, before I get into the thick of it, I want to point out that I have played against Rob in several men’s softball leagues, and he is a fucking stud. He is the fastest player out there, he hits a bomb every time he comes up, and holy shit he is a lefty shortstop that dominates. If only the AL Central was a slow pitch 12” league. Rob basically held his own at the plate with a .360 OBP, and a 98 OPS+, but when you take in the defense, it was so so bad, a -.9 WAR isn’t doing it for me. What if he could cover more than a 6 foot radius? What if he could make the right read on a fly ball? Would we be celebrating back to back WS titles? Damn you Rob Mackowiak!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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“Out there dad, that is where the ball is supposed to go”

Honorable Mention: Drake LaRoche. Have you ever had a take your child to work day? It was cute, your child got to see where mommy/daddy worked. You had lunch together, and everyone went home happy. You know what you did the next day? No? Well, let me tell you. You woke up, went to work, did the shit you did every day with the exception of yesterday, and guess what, there was no fucking kid there. Everyone wants to tip toe around this, but Adam LaRoche is a weirdo. Who wants to spend every moment with their child? I have 2 of them, and I gotta be honest, if they were with me every moment, it would not only make my production go down, it would make me underappreciate the time that I do get to spend with them. Now, you could say “Polish, your hatred is really towards Adam.” But what sane 14 yr old wants to spend every moment with his dad? When I was 14, I was trying to get past 2nd base, and not on a baseball diamond. Instead, this weirdo is indirectly the reason that the Sox are in the mainstream media.

I would like to thank Baseball Reference for having the stats to confirm just how bad these 5 were.

– Polish with Extra Onions

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The 5 – Keep it local – By MySoxSummer

Welcome to a little slice of Sox-cusssion we like to call The 5. When we think of 5 reasons to write about something, we will. If you think of something you’d like us to write about tweet it to us @fromthe108 using the hashtag #thesox5.  Don’t have Twitter, leave us a message below in the comments. Or hell, we are on the Facebook here, send us a message there too!

Keep it local.  We hear that a lot.  We think that means fresh, exciting, local.  We think we are supporting people that live in our communities and in most cases we are.  There are a few areas in the ballpark where a local product is being used and it is a far superior than what was there before.

Pizza – In 2012 they had DiGiorno. I heard that before that they had Connie’s, which makes perfect sense being in Chicago. I think the Cubs carried Gino’s for awhile.  But it always broke my heart that in Chicago, in our ballparks, we were serving frozen pizza.  WTF. Never ,under any circumstance, was I going to eat a damn slice of frozen pizza. Nothing against the pizza, it is plenty fine when I am drunk or really hungry and lazy, but when I am a short walk from Fabulous Freddie’s, I will stick to the classics. But then, the Sox announced in 2014 the switch to a Chicago favorite, Beggars.  That stuff is great, and it is very easy to carry 4 or 5 slices back to your buds on a Friday game.  BeefLoaf is convinced that if there was a guy walking around selling pizza, it would do awesome.  But he’ll talk about that later.

Beer – The Sox have always had a great selection of beers available at the park.  I admire that. I still drink (at the games) mostly Miller Lite, but having the option to have a Summer Shandy or Blue Moon is great.  But last season they did the unthinkable, they added in Chicago’s Revolution Brewery Anti-Hero IPA and Lagunitas IPA, ON DRAFT.I think they cost $10.75 for a 24oz beer, which I am sure has you like nah, but what if I told you it is the best deal (per ounce and in alcohol content) in the park.  It is actually cheaper than Miller Lite, and has more alcohol.  Miller Lite is $8 for 16oz, so 50¢ an ounce.  But with the Lagunitas and Anti-Hero you pay just 45¢ per ounce. It makes cents.  I talked to the food and beverage guy at SoxFest ’16 and he wasn’t sure that deal or the beer would be back.  Not sure we’d have the drafts from the local guys, which in all honesty, bums me the F out.

So there are two great examples of local being better.  Here is one more area that we think the Sox could make the game day experience even more localized.

Intro Music. 

Years and years the sounds of Australia’s own AC/DC welcomed our boys on the field.  Last year, the sounds of Fall Out Boy THEN AC/DC did the job.  Fall Out Boy has some local ties, but damn, not my bag. The song makes sense too, “Light It Up”, yeah we all get it, but nothing about FOB speaks to Sox fans.  AC/DC did and does ring true to the Southside. So who local can we play to get that same vibe?  Here our our top 5 selections.

1. “High-Fiving MF” – Local H.

If you haven’t heard this song, do yourself a favor and listen to it now.  Turn it up too. Local H is from Zion, IL and my god do they rock.  This song just get’s ya amped up.  For reals.  Even play the instrumental version (lots of swears) at the game, so much better than FOB.

2. “Good Ass Intro” – Chance The Rapper.

Chance. Dude is the real deal.  Local product. Local flavor. Loves the Sox. Reps the Sox. Can’t think of a better rapper to watch our boys run onto the field to.

3. “Seether” – Veruca Salt.

Chicks that rock. Still rock. Their album American Thighs still hits as hard as it did back in the day.

4. “N.W.O.” – Ministry.

Just because this kicks off a little harder than “Jesus Built My Hotrod” I choose “N.W.O.” I used to rock out to this as a high schooler back in the day too, blaring this CD (or a tape copy that was made from this CD) in my ’81 Chevette with the Realistic tape deck and Realistic speakers. Rocked then and it rocks now. Does it get ya ready to play some baseball? Hell yes.  It’s mean. It’s raw. It’s local.

5. “Cherub Rock” – Smashing Pumpkins.

A great intro song on one of the best albums of the 90’s.  I saw the Smashing Pumpkins so many times in my youth, it was really awesome. This song would be great at high volume at the park, while we watch the highlights of yesteryear. Remembering when the Pumpkins (and the Sox) were great.

So there you have it, 5 songs that are a far better intro song than Fall Out Boy. Don’t like it?  Hate tweet me at @fromthe108.  Do it. Think I missed something?  Send me a tweet. Just do it. Love it?  Share it with your Sox friends.  We love attention, so share the f outta this.  Share away!

Follow us on Twitter – @fromthe108.  Add us on the Facebook – click here!

-MySoxSummer

 

Upcoming Season Preview by BeefLoaf

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This article is sponsored by Wu-Tang Financial

Everyone and their mama (and mama’s mama’s….mama’s mama’s) is doing a season preview for MLB or for their particular team, spending 10,000 words explaining why their 1 yr $3MM free agent (no interest in talking Matt Latos, but Cat Latos should be a thing) is just the lottery ticket this team needs to win the division.  Your friends from #Section108 have no interest in this sort of preview…I mean, we do love to talk and read about baseball, particularly the White Sox, and any time you venture into the 108, you can bet your sweet tokis that we’ll be talking about something at least tangentially baseball related, but this preview is about the fan experience, particularly the #Section108 experience.

Beer Vendors

#Section108 has had a tough ride the last several years with our beer vendors, which tends to be an excellent gauge of how fun of an experience you will have at a major league

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R.I.P. Kenny.

ballpark.  Beer, Peanuts, Encased Meats are the bane of existence through which hardcore fans enjoy the game.  The 2014 season saw us getting less and less exposure to beer vendor Richard (we believe that was managements decision) and beer vendor Perla (her career and family were taking off at once)………also, beer vendor Don sustained an injury which had him out most of the season.  Lastly, and most importantly, between the 2014 and 2015 season, beer vendor Kenny passed away, leaving us very short handed.  As we head into 2016, beer vendor Don is slated for retirement, so we are left with newcomer beer vendor Brian and the excellent effort of beer vendor/margarita vendor James (we’ll have our beer vendor rankings for RF out in the early part of the 2016 season).  From this standpoint, we appear to be solid, but probably need reinforcements.  Luckily, in the 108, you have craft beers and the XFinity bar at the top of the stairs at the concourse level, so even when we cry and moan, we still have it better than the rest of the park.

Food

The White Sox always use their new food offerings as some sort of a marketing ploy, as if someone goes to a ballgame just to consume an $11 sandwich.  Other than “Bacon on a Stick”, I can’t think of another gourmet food item that I was even remotely excited to

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The elusive double dog. 

consume…….that being said, the usual food suspects are done well and a Hot Dog with grilled onions and yellow mustard is about as good as it gets when attending a ball game.  Beggar’s pizza is quality………but the best deal in the park is the box of popcorn, cheap, salty, delicious.  Food is always very low on the totem pole for the 108 crew, since there are many games in which we choose to have liquid dinner, but occasionally, we’ll grab a bite and possibly even eat a soft pretzel that might have grazed the ground after purchase.  The good thing about the folks in 108 is that they won’t judge you if you have a dab or two of nacho cheese or yellow mustard on your attire.

Ballpark Staff

Most ballpark staff is helpful and attentive……………BUT, entering the ballpark, last year, with metal detectors and body cavity searches was a flipping disaster……….the staff got better as the season went on, but expect long delays if this team actually gets their act together and starts drawing.  Opening day 2 years ago was embarrassing, it was 45 mins to get into the park.  I don’t even want to think about the possibility of this team starting the year winning, it will further encourage the 108 crew to enter the ballpark in the 2nd inning as is par for the course.  Also, while I am wang whipping the club, I might as well mention the red shirts who incessantly check tickets for no apparent reason.  The 108 is at full capacity about 4 times per year………..the other 77 home dates bounce between 50% of seats sold and 1% of seats sold, so checking my ticket when I am in the same fucking seat every game doesn’t seem a good use of time.  As a general rule, at any ballpark, if a fan is in another fans seat, they can usually solve the problem in a matter of 8 seconds with no issue…….red shirts, please do your job, by doing nothing.  Thanks, #Section108

The Team

Alright, for fucksake, I guess I have to talk about the team.  Let’s skip over the acquisitions of Frazier and Lawrie.  When you sit in the 108, your main concerns are A) The Right Fielder and B) Weird occurrences.  Let’s start with A), its been a bad run of RF’s for

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Play ball!

us………..you have to go back to Jermaine Dye to find someone endearing and worth rooting for…………..Alex Rios was an okay player, but other than his walk up song (“Beggin”) there wasn’t much there…………..Avi Garcia is especially underwhelming, lots of tools, but no real production, unless you count the jumping over the wall HR saving catches (mind you, Avi is 6′ 4″, the fence is about 8′ high, he should be able to reach over the fence flatfooted to catch the ball, but I digress)……………there doesn’t seem to be any help on the way for us, unless, somehow the Sox make a signing that allows Adam Eaton to play RF,………………….. insert, Austin Jackson!!!  This is the type of signing that gives the 108 something to cheer about.  Adam Eaton, regularly in RF (most likely).  We probably won’t streak onto the field, but I can’t count it out, lets just say with Eaton playing RF for a big chunks of the year, the crew of Section 108 will shine.  On to B), we won’t have anything as fun or annoying this year as Geo Soto.  Between falling into the dirt after toss back to the mound, or fixing that by grabbing his procreator incessantly after each pitch, there will be nothing as l0ltastic as that to see during a game.  I suspect we’ll get some excessive celebratory antics at some point from Brett Lawrie (provided he actually does something worth celebrating)…………..and I guess we will always have Melky Cabrera’s craziness (which is great!!!), I am holding out hope that someone steps up into the weirdness and provides some additional entertainment to those of us that occupy ballpark seats on the regular.

Beefloaf

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Stop it with the MGD – By Chorizy-E

The Quandry

There are many things in today’s game that make me scratch my head:

How did Ken Griffey Jr not get 100% of the Hall of Fame vote?

Why do we do everything to protect pitchers, but then force them to bat in the NL?

Why is Pete Rose not in the Hall of Fame?

Did the Cubs really think we’d believe Darwin Barney was going to be their 2B of the future?

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Looking good!

But more perplexing than all of these questions is that the Chicago White Sox organization believes that anyone in their stadium wants to drink Miller Genuine Draft.  I drink my fair share of beers throughout the baseball season and every game, the same thing happens: A vendor tells me “Sorry, all I have left is MGD.”  This isn’t that surprising as it would be the same if they made the hot dog vendors carry around 50 hot dogs and 5 blocks of tofu (I have no idea how tofu is served).

 

White Sox, why are you doing this to your vendors?  Why are you doing this to your fans?

 

The Facts

Please explain to me, who are these MGD drinkers?  Have you ever seen an actual human pulling a case of MGD off the shelf at the store? No.  Have you ever gone to anyone’s home and been offered an MGD?  No.  If someone offered you an MGD, you’d assume they had never had a beer in their life and just got whatever because they knew your drunk ass was coming over. It’s actually difficult to find a picture of someone drinking a MGD, except this guy, and you don’t want to be this guy.

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It made me wonder if I was somehow closed off from the MGD revolution and was just unaware of how insanely popular this beer is.  So I turned to the one thing I could trust, Al Gore’s internet.  According to a study I found on beerinsights.com, my assumption was correct, it is simply not consumed.

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It’s not in the top 20 beers sold in this country.  More people buy Bud Ice and Natural Ice than MGD.  More people drink Yuengling and you can only get that in like 5 states.  So I ask again, why do the White Sox think we want to drink this?

The Solution

Fear not, I didn’t come here to just bitch and moan.  I am a man of solutions and there is a simple one.  Replace MGD with High Life.  As you can see from the numbers above, people Eu81T.St.117consume High Life like few other beers in the country.  Now I know what you’re gonna say “Chorizy-E, MGD and High Life are made with the same recipe, you idiot.”  To this I say, mix up 2 batches of cake ingredients, bake one and freeze one.  I’ll take the baked cake, you can have the frozen thing you ignorant MGD drinker.  I mean, High Life is just delicious.  If it were socially acceptable, I would drink it for breakfast.  Hey, maybe I already do, but that is not the point here.  The point here is allowing beer vendors to regain pride in every beer they sell, to allow fans to enjoy every beer that comes to their seat, and for me to get higher alcohol content beer than Lite for the same price without risk of it having a boisenberry aftertaste that is just lovely.  Plus, we should honor this guy’s memory because he was truly awesome.

The Sad Truth

I leave you with a story.  I was sitting two rows away from a father who had brought his teenage daughter out to a White Sox game on a beautiful summer afternoon.  Around the 5th inning a beer vendor came by and uttered those fateful words: “Sorry, all I have left is MGD.”  The father retorted “That’s fine, I’ll have one.”  His daughter looked at him in disgust and said “I can’t believe you ordered that.”  All respect she ever had for the man who lovingly raised her flew out the window.  Chicago White Sox, you ruined that man’s family.  Please replace MGD with High Life.

-Chorizy-E

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