Week 13 College Football Bets

The blog ran into some terrible luck last weekend and we had our first winless weekend of the season.  It happens, we will not back down without a fight and are ready to flip the table for this week.  We welcome our good friend with questionable character, Aloha Mr. Hand this week as our guest picker, which seems like the perfect guest picker to help right the shit.  Check out his podcast The Tainted Glove as well as his latest contributions to the Tainted Glove network The Collectors Corner where you can see some amazing sports memorabilia.   

Brew Hand Bet One: “The Game” 1st Half Under 27.5

The biggest rivalry in college football kicks off at “high noon on Saturday” to quote the legendary Brent Musberger (man I miss the Brent Musberger drinking game!).  JJ McCarthy will have to carry the weight of the offense in the stupid horseshoe stadium this weekend as it sounds like Heisman candidate Blake Corum may not be able to play.  Additionally, both Michigan and Ohio State have been afraid of the end zone during the first half of games this season.  Give me the under in a low scoring affair between two teams that come out to play wearing cinder blocks for cleats.  

Brew Hand Bet Two: LSU vs Texas A&M (LSU Team Total over 29.5)

I’ve gotta get something off of my chest here for a second. Why in the world is a 2 loss LSU ranked ahead of a 1 loss USC??!! What. The. H!!?? Alright, that’s the end of my rant on #CFPAnon. LSU being ranked 5th is absurd. The only thing that can convince me that they’re worthy of sniffing the College Football Playoff as a two-loss team is to run up the score against their opponent. Texas A&M is in a tailspin and they’re stuck with Jimbo Fisher for eternity because of how much his buyout costs. This is the perfect opponent and a golden opportunity to rack up style points to try to convince people that maybe they can be the first two loss team to be considered for the College Football Playoff.

King Nom #108ing Bet: Moneyline Parlay (Ohio State, TCU, Georgia +102)

After an abysmal season performance, I handed the lock of the week over to my daughter, Princess Nom.  She started off with a big win and got a raise in her allowance because of it.  She followed that up with a loss last week and as a result she has been kicked to the curb.  Since I would never let Queen Nom anywhere near my gambling picks, that means you guys get me back just in time to get hot for the upcoming bowl season!  This week we are going with a chalk 3 team parlay.  TCU needs to keep winning to stay in the playoff hunt, Ohio State is going to handle Michigan (editor’s note, FU Nom Go Blue!), and Georgia will continue its dominant ways.  This one sure seems like easy money.  Jump back on and win some cash with me!  Do NOT #FadeKingNom or you can GFY!

Guest Picker- Aloha Mr. Hand:  Auburn vs Alabama (Auburn +22)

Aloha!  It’s your favorite friend with questionable character, Mr. Hand.  They are calling for rain in Tuscaloosa so I think it will lead to a closer game.  This isn’t a typical ‘Bama team.  Further, this year the Iron Bowl will be Auburn’s Super Bowl and nothing would make a bad season sting less than beating the Tide.  Auburn +22.  

-Brew Hand Luke