How goes it y’all? Yeah. Same. We’re trying for ya, keep bringing in new talent to the newest good idea from ‘Loaf: #3Things. It’s a really fun series, you should take one for a test drive. If you like it, tell your friends. If you don’t like it, listen to another one or just GFY. We hope you all are staying safe and sane out there.
So we have a vast array of folks that make up #WhiteSox Twitter, it’s crazy! I thought it would be fun to catch up with a few of them and see what they are doing to pass the time at home. I, for one, was really shocked by what some of the guys (and girls) have shifted their time to.
KenWo – Knitting
With no professional sports or amateur sports with STB, Ken is feeling kinda low. But fear not, he has found a hobby to fill his heart and time. That’s right, the favorite heel of #WhiteSox Twitter has taken up knitting! Shocking! He tells us – “I was gonna do some sewing but my old Singer is on the fritz.” Damn. Knit on bro.
Mrs. BeefLoaf – Fostering All The Cats
Always been an animal lover (she married that beast ya know) Mrs. Loaf has taken on saving the entire homeless cat population. “It’s been a wild ride to have all of the cats in the world staying at our place!” That’s fucking amazing. No word on where BeefLoaf or Bonita have been staying, Mrs. ‘Loaf has repurposed their rooms and beds into huge cat enclosures.
Juan Uribe’s Cup – Teaching Jesus To Kids
After a few late nights watching YouTube videos about JC, Mr. Cup decided to go against all the orders to stay at home and start up his own Catholic school. He’s been baptizing kids in the name of the Lord 24-7. “I once was lost, but now I am found. It’s great to be a leader in the gym of the Lord.”
Side Note – A guy I knew in high school went from being a huge party guy to a huge born again, after an acid trip. I always contended that God was hiding in his shoe. #Unconfirmed
White Sox Dave – Interior Decorating
Yep. Fucking crazy. A guy who a few weeks ago was eating half cooked steaks off of blue Frisbees is now helping #WhiteSox Twitter get their places in order. He can tell you if your pallet is fall, spring or whatever the fuck those dudes do. He has 17 swatch books to make sure you find the perfect color.
Ali White Sox A.K.A. Ali White Claw – Weedtender
She’s got the mad sticky-icky growing in her basement. Currently working on a CBD Laced / Sativa Infused / Gummi Bear Flavored / White Claw-like beverage. She told us the best part of the whole experience is “giving the drinks a test run.” Soon to be available in the parking lot of your local Jewels.
Wally$ – Rastafarian
After running out of hair product and with no way to get his hair cut, Wally has decided to embrace the Rastafarian lifestyle. The change from Bacardi to buds wasn’t as hard as one would expect. Wally has been “born again” in the (bong) waters of the holy and smoked himself into godliness. Yuh seet!