This is pretty much a “What I did on my Summer Vacation” article. I never go to write those as a kid, so I’ll do it now. And to clarify, It wasn’t so much because our teachers didn’t care, but they wanted to stay blissfully ignorant of the child labor laws that were most likely being broken over those summers. That said, this is about what I did instead of watching the Sox this week.
Monday – Olympics
It was an off day for the Sox, so I didn’t have much choice. So I watched the Olympics. I had heard so much about the horrible conditions of Rio, that I was really expecting to see a guy rowing a twin size mattress through the Amazon with chupacabras chasing him. Instead I saw a bunch of sports that nobody watches anytime other than when the Olympics are on. Overall, there were definitely some incredible athletes representing their respective countries quite admirably. And I am sure I’ll get to see them again in either Cirque Du Soleil, Subway commercials, or CDC quarantines.
Tuesday – DOFH
I went out for some $3 Surly Hell Lagers right after work. It was nice to sit on a roof top deck, drinks some reasonably priced draughts, and watch an over-served girl get carted out by paramedics. That’s what Tuesday is all about. After doing that, I was a bit tipsy, so I just watched this on repeat instead of the Sox
Wednesday – Sumac
A friend told me Sumac was playing at Township and we should head up there. I obliged and ended up doing something I hadn’t ever done: I bought ear plugs at a show. Now let me explain, this is not me getting old (though I am), this is a band bringing in enough gear to play the United Center in a 150 capacity room. That said, it was awesome. Interesting side note, I saw multiple people wearing Sox gear. So I guess the Sox have finally made in-roads with the much sought after noise metal community.
Thursday – Bears
Friday – Beefloaf’s Place
So I didn’t make it through without watching any Sox. I caught some at Beefloaf’s place, since he would not let me watch A-Rod’s final game as a Yankee. But that’s ok, because A-Rod will be on the Sox in no time and I’ll get to see him in person. Plus, we ended up spending most of our time talking about North Korea’s dominance in the Olympics.
So what did I learn? Nothing. I rarely learn anything. because I’m an old stubborn jerk. But overall it was nice to take a break, but nothing really compares to baseball, so I’ll see you on Friday in the 108.
All right, someone had to say it: Sox/Cubs games at US Cellular Field Suck! The reason youdon’t realize this is that Sox and Cubs fans are “supposed” to have a stupid rivalry (we don’t) and Pud Selig sold everyone on why inter-league play is so great (it’s fine, but all the other leagues do it and don’t make a big deal about it)………..but these games blow…..
I’ll admit, I enjoyed those backyard fighting videos of Kimbo Slice back in the day as much as the next guy, but what I don’t really enjoy is a fight breaking out every half inning between two knuckleheads that can’t handle their booze/got cuckold’d last weekend/were recently fired from their job……….whatever. I’m here to enjoy a ball game, not watching a slap and tickle fight between idiots. Fights not only cause a disturbance to those around the activity, but they also increase scrutiny from security and discourage people from being willing to bring their families…..
OVER SERVED FANS
We in the 108 have been known to take down a beverage or two, but the Sox/Cubs games bring out the worst in people consuming………a few years back we had some rough looking fellows sitting a row back of us in the 108. One of their party had a little too much fun and in the 2nd inning, had, what they call in the eating competitions, a “reversal of fortune”……….that was no fun………….in fact, the 108’ers had their own day in which they consumed too much Limoncello before the game…..BeefLoaf decided to remove himself from the ballpark in the 5th inning, not to be heard from until the next day. It gets ugly.
Really, it’s amateur hour. It’s the only thing that rivals St Patrick’s Day, because it has all the same elements as a St Patty’s Day bar at 10pm: there’s a fight, there’s a guy puking, there’s a girl crying, and for some unknown reason, people are in John Barleycorn’s.
Shut the fuck up with this.
It is a fake rivarly……….we all know it…………..as much as the media has always tried to pin Sox fans vs Cubs fans, we really don’t hate each other, and we really couldn’t give a fuck about each others’ teams other than some good natured ball busting. Most years, at least one of the teams is horrible, so the stakes are meh. I remember watching Darin Erstad try to make a diving catch in CF and his career being over…….nobody wants to see that. It is only exacerbated by the stupid BP Cup (which was extra fun after the oil spill)…….it’s Chicago baseball’s participation trophy.
THE SOX WILL SWEEP
The Sox have shown their true colors and it is time for a tear down. But you and I both know, they’ll sweep this series or at least win it and give people a false sense of hope. And of course, this is right before the deadline.
– BeefLoaf and Chorizy-E
Growing up I remember teams, the 1989 “Flyin’ Illini”, 91-93 Bulls, ’85 Bears, but besides Jordan, Bo Jackson was one of the biggest sports figures in my life. I loved Bo. I have a huge card collection of only Bo’s. I bought sets to just get Bo’s that I needed. Watching Bo go down in that football game was hard. But when the Sox picked him up, I was over the moon. My first White Sox game was his second game back, he homered. I lost my shit. I have the posters. I have the shirts. I have his book.
Many years later, when Bo was gonna be at SoxFest, I was amped. I went home to get my “The Ball Player” poster for him to sign. Then I found out that Bo doesn’t sign that picture, at all, anymore. For those of you not familiar with SoxFest, most guys will sign anything you give them. But Bo and Carlton Fisk have only been signing free pics that the Sox give out when they appear at SoxFest. No outside items. Seriously. If you want Bo to sign a different item, he won’t. I understand this for a couple reasons.
It’s how he makes his nut.
Bo’s career was short, he didn’t make a bunch of money from sports. Endorsements? Maybe. But it’s a nice retirement package charging $100+ a signature. I respect that.
People sell his stuff, why can’t he?
I get that too. I would be pissed if I did something that commanded a certain value and I didn’t get my share. It’s just the way it is. I don’t fault him for that.
Why are we talking about this? In case you missed it, the Sox released the first official Bo Jackson bobblehead. It’s a beaut. You can purchase it here from the Sox. Part of the money goes to charity, good cause. I bought a bunch at the game. I have a pretty big bobble collection and collect mostly White Sox. I trade with other people and Bo is a huge figure in the bobble world. In my limited experience with this bobble game, the cheapest the bobble will ever be is when it first comes out. As time goes by the price goes up due to less being available. That has been sorta skewed as more people are buying more to sell, so the market stays flooded longer than it had been a few years before. I have written about bobbles before, you can read that here.
Do I sell bobbles for profit? Absolutely. I take risks buying multiple tickets, multiple bobbles, all in the hopes it will go up in price. Sometimes you cash in early, sometimes it takes time. I usually hold onto stuff, most of the time it works, sometimes it doesn’t. I have lost money, but I have also made enough money to make it worthwhile to take these calculated risks. So yeah, I saw this Bo as chance to trade for some harder to get items and maybe sell a few.
The White Sox being the White Sox sold this online before they did at the park. Which kinda sucks if you go to games. I know the idea is to sell them, but don’t you want people at the park? I think that more people would make the trip over or in to pickup this bobble this weekend. Sell it online after the first weekend it is available, but let us fans that go regularly get treated special.
If you don’t know, for people that check in with the MLB Ballpark App the Sox give out prizes when you show up. The give you a free shirt for 1 check in, which is awesome. Great to give the kids and adults something to bring home. But as you get more and more check in’s, the prizes get better. For 50 games you get a Golden Chris Sale bobble head. A few weeks ago, before the 50 home game mark, they gave out the bobbles to people that Tweeted something. Seriously? The guys making it to 50 games don’t get it first? Just rubs me (and other collectors) the wrong way. I don’t fault them, but it just feels like we got slighted in this case.
So yesterday, I posted some Bo’s online. I posted them before I got them because, ‘Merica. I was the first listed, and yep, it was listed at a high price. If you don’t know about Ebay, listed prices are not selling prices. Just because I listed it for $125, doesn’t mean I got that for it when (and if) it sold. I have been selling stuff on Ebay for years, I buy stuff that way too. I sold 1, for much less than my $125 asking price, but enough to make it worth my time. Within hours more and more people listed for much less than me, but all still higher than the asking price from the Sox. That’s business. That’s how it works.
Thursday night, I got a text with an article about the Bo bobble. Bo was quoted saying this-
He was not happy to see one for sale for $125 online Thursday morning. As a result, he said he won’t be signing them. “The thing that bothers me is we do this for a good cause but you have those hustlers out there that buy them and put them online,” he said.
My childhood hero, the guy who hawked stuff that I bought, called me a hustler in the Trib. Fucking badass. What is a hustler? The FIRST definition is “an enterprising person determined to succeed; go-getter.” Wow. Bo Jackson recognizes my talent and he doesn’t even know me! (Well, we’ve met once, but I doubt I made any impression on him.) Other definitions are not as nice, but reselling something at a higher price than it is offered in other places isn’t illegal. It shouldn’t even be looked down upon. Just like professional athletes making as much money as they can, they should be a hustler too. Get you some. I am all for it. We as fans shouldn’t bitch either, we support it.
What I don’t like is him using that as an excuse on why he won’t sign them when he wasn’t gonna sign them anyways. Why was Bo on Ebay looking up his bobblehead? Why does he even care? I think the author told him about it, but come on Bo, you wouldn’t have signed them anyways and I don’t fault you for that. I know he has signed custom bobbles before, wasn’t happy about them, but he did it cause he was paid to do it. So, maybe if you pay him he will still sign it for you. But if he doesn’t and I ruined this for everyone, sorry guys. But right now I am the silent fall guy for my childhood hero. And that is fine, I will do that for you Bo. I owe ya for all the years of entertainment.
Detroit. Yup. You can hate it. How can you not?
Cleveland. Kinda. Harder than Detroit to hate but they have more to offer than just empty buildings.
Kansas City? BBQ FOOL. I can’t hate KC for 2 other reasons too. Bo Jackson & a cool logo.
But even better than KC is Minneapolis. Have you been? Place is amaze balls. People are nice. Beer is good. And they like to get down. Any city that produced Prince, Charles Shulz and The Coen Brothers is ok by me. Here’s my top 5 reasons why I can’t hate on the Twin Cities, but not the Twins. I only need one reason to hate the Twins. Joe Mauer. #suckitmauer
Man. I wish, I so wish, I could wear this hat. But it’s the fucking Twins, fuck the Twins. It is a classic. Simple, yet so strong. As a designer, I love it. Shows pride. Unlike Chicago with our violent North vs South battle, the folks in MN decided 2 is better than 1. Which brings us to……
It’s a mantra. Having experienced it first hand a few times, people are just nicer. Maybe it’s because they are housebound for months on end, maybe they are just better people. I don’t know. But I do know that I got a serious friendly vibe in MN.
Atmosphere, Brother Ali & Rhymesayers Entertainment!
Back in the day I was convinced that I would enjoy California because most of the bands I liked were based in California. I lived there for 7 years, fucking spot on, besides the traffic. In 2003 I was introduced to Atmosphere. If you haven’t heard of them, wow, just wow. Go pick up When Life Gives You Lemons You Paint That Shit Gold, which is one of my favorite albums of all time. I have seen them live multiple times. Just a great show. My first show was in Long Beach, CA amazing. The second show was in Pomona, CA at the legendary Glasshouse with Brother Ali. Brother Ali is an albino Muslim who was raised in a black neighborhood. I had my doubts that first show, but goddamn, he kills it. I have seen them both perform in MN too, at their huge Hip hop show Soundset. Went two years in a row, pretty amazing.
In 2010, I met up with some friends at Brits. We drank on the roof and had a great time. I downed several pints of Guinness. The following year I found myself at Brits again and watched as person after person ordered some unknown beer. I made a comment to my brother-in-law about how this beer must be amazing and seconds after I said that a taster appeared in front of me. 6 pints later not only was I loving life but also drunk as hell. It was Surly Furious. Now you can get this all over the midwest, but back then you couldn’t. Shits amazing. A solid APA/ESB that I credit with really getting me into craft beer. Fresh is even better. Check these guys out if you get the chance, you can get 2 of their offerings at the Cell, Furious and Hell.
Do I have to explain? The guy wrote amazing lyrics and songs. He also plays better guitar than all other people combined. What more do you need? Plus his old club downtown First Avenue is just an amazing joint. Drug use and religion aside, the guy changed the game. He also had hometown pride. He NEVER left. He build his city up. Respect.
Quernzy is the lovely partner/wife/drinking buddy to our very own Chorizy-E. She likes a good time, even though she married a guy who looks like her grandpa (if her grandpa was mexican and had grey hair). She also is majorly famous having appeared in many movies and TV shows. Check her out on IMDB. Huge sports fan, it runs in her blood, as her mom’s favorite movie of all time is Rocky (and she was a season ticket holder for the O’s and Ravens).
If you’re still watching the White Sox, you’re probably drinking way more alcohol. And sometimes a beer may not be strong enough when the other team is about to score their 10th run. So I did you a favor and tested out all the non-beer options on the concourse level of US Cellular Field.
Many of you will probably start off a game by heading to the “Frozen Zone” near the bleachers and pick up a Frozen Mango Daiquiri in an obnoxious souvenir cup that you’ll never use again. But after a few sips, you will regret that decision. They are way too sweet and you will have a headache to prove it. Not to mention, a ridiculous cup that looks like you just left a horrible bachelorette party.
Opt instead for a Frozen Margarita from the vendors in the aisles. Delicious! And just the right amount to finish before it melts. Some have Frozen Vodka Lemonade, equally good. Unfortunately, there are not a lot of these vendors, so keep an eye out for them.
One of my favorite non-frozen cocktails at the park is a Vodka Lemonade near Section 106 at the “K”orner Beer Stand. While you are over there, check out the Xfinity Bar near Section 108. They have a specialty cocktail menu and The ChiSox Mule is worth the long lines at the bar. If the park is packed, be prepared to wait for half an inning (aka an entire James Shields start).
And for something a little different – try the coffee with a shot of Baileys and get a souvenir mug at the “Winning Ugly is Sweet” Stand at Section 143. Now that it’s summer, this might not be the best choice, but don’t worry, the stadium will be cold and empty in just a few short months.
Overall, there are plenty of non-beer options on the first level and given the Sox recent play, you’re gonna need them.
Follow Quernzy here!
What are we talking about here?
The White Sox from time to time come up with promotions to try to fill seats. Some of them are very successful like Halfway to St Pat’s or Elvis Night. But some, some are not so good. I present you with Guys Night.
So what is the insanely cool thing that makes this “Guys Night”?
Ticket prices are discounted, which is nice, but there is also a giveaway. It’s a hat, and from the image looks kind of cool, but two problems here:
- Hats are about the most unisex giveaway possible
- Hat vouchers are limited to the first 500 tickets purchased
The first 500? This is about 9500 short of a normal giveaway.
I’m not quite sure what makes this “Guys Night” or even what would entice you to go to this. Maybe they can go with the fact that it will be the last time you’ll get to see Bryce Harper at the Cell for a long while? I mean, unless the Sox and Nats play in the World Series.
So I guess it’s a promotion to get 500 more people in the seats to see the reigning National League MVP .
Why do we need this?
I’m sure you’ve visited the park and thought to yourself “I wish there were more guys here.” I think in general, the Sox want more people in the seats, but I think that ratio is typically a majority guys and you’ve probably topped out in that portion of the market.
I guess they may see this as a way to sell more beer at the park on a Thursday night and maybe they’re right. And when has that ever worked out poorly for the Sox?
So why do we need this? We don’t.
Like most things in life, Dave Chappelle has already shown why this is a terrible idea.
If you haven’t watched the wonderful 13th inning of the Sox/Mets game from last Wednesday, where 108’s fave Matt “El Nino” Albers starred, please do yourself a fuggin’ service and go back and watch it! In light of this virtuoso performance from El Nino, it has inspired me to write about 5 of my favorite overweight heroes