Bandwagon Cubs Fans, Repent!

Folks, its your old buddy BeefLoaf…………this is a special post, a playoff baseball post.  This is a post that should help you and more importantly, your Cubs fan friends, enjoy baseball this time of year.  A recent series of discussions between the 108ers helped us identify that most of OUR friends that claim their fandom to the Northside team, are very, very casual fans and few, if any, actually attended, or even so much as watched or listened to games during their extended hiatus from playoff baseball.  Now, this isn’t a sin in the biblical sense, but it is a sin of fandom if you intend to sport your Cubbie blue all over the goddamn place and choose to be obnoxious to your fellow Southsider that has been living and dying with an awful team for 8 years.  So upon further review (no worries, Mike Carey isn’t advising us), I decided to create a list of things that the bandwagon Cubs fans can do to repent and feel full enjoyment for this current playoff run.  White Sox fans, please pass this list on to your Cubs fan friends and together we can live in harmony, like ebony and ivory.
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Re-embrace Sammy Sosa………..I’m tired of it, as Cubs fans, you love Sammy Sosa, so I want you to bring him back in to your life….I think hanging an 8×11 photo of him in your den should do the trick.  Extra credit for hanging a picture of “White” Sammy Sosa
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Buy an old school shirsey………….I’d suggest EITHER something from your childhood, whatever era that might be (I’m in my late 30’s so a Manny Trillo shirsey might be fun)………..OR a guy that none of the other bandwagon fans know who the fuck they are…….like 2012 All Star Bryan LaHair
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Drink nothing but Old Style for an entire playoff game.  It used to be the main beer at the park on Sheffield and Addison, so go nostalgic and knock back some Old Style
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Rewatch Glenallen Hill’s May 11, 2000 monster fucking home run.  It’s seriously the longest fucking home run I have ever seen (I don’t care what the record books say).  And it’s so easy to find in the YouTube era, so go check it out.  If it is your first time viewing it, please watch it in private, because it’s NSFW
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7wDrw76ieTs
Adopt some vintage Cubs styles to your personal ensemble……I’ll leave this to your imagination, but a couple of things that would really endear you to the hard core Cubs fans and your White Sox brethren as well would be getting a perm like 80’s closer Lee Smith, or possibly an I ❤️ Sandy Sandberg tattoo, you know, something really classy
Say it out loud, so all can hear…”FUCK RYAN DEMPSTER AND HIS STUPID FUCKING IMPRESSION OF WILL FARRELL DOING HARRY CARAY!!!!” We all know this sucks, and I’m still not sure why this is allowed to be on TV.  You’ll be considered part of the die-hards if you say this blows

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Make sure others know that you blame Alex Gonzalez and Dusty Baker’s over usage of Mark Prior in game 2, for the 2003 team’s NLCS collapse, and NOT Steve Bartman.
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Create a macaroni statue of your favorite current player or coach, I’d suggest Chris Bosio as it would take the most possible macaroni of any person in the dugout.   Don’t let him near your statue though, I doubt he could resist, as it appears his self control around the table is in question.
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Get into a bar fight with Kyle Farnsworth.  To be honest, most of you  have probably already done this, or if you are woman, you have been sloppily hit on by him, so this is probably the least necessary one on the list, but I’ll leave it on here for those that were incarcerated or underage during those years.

Godspeed.

 – BeefLoaf

The 5 – Players that RV will waste playing time on in a lost September

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I don’t trust grown men who wear rubber bracelets.
When it gets to September the last several years, it is almost certain that our White Sox are just playing out the string.  That doesn’t mean that this time of year can’t be valuable in some way shape or form even if that doesn’t have anything to due with the Win/Loss columns in the 2016 standings.  Smarter writers than those here at the 108 have noted that PA (Plate Appearances) are a commodity to be used wisely.  Alas, we still have Robin Ventura at the helm and he’s guaranteed to hurt the White Sox down the stretch even when the standings don’t matter, by giving those valuable PA to players that don’t matter and leaving on the bench players we’d like to see, to determine if they can be someone on the big club……….the list below…in no particular order, will make me cry when it actually occurs.
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James, don’t go away mad. James, just go away. #crue #wallymoney
5. James Shields – Wasting even one more start this season on this dumpster fire is terrible team management top to bottom.   I understand he’s likely to exercise his option and be under contract for two more seasons, but running him out there as a starter in 2016 for the White Sox or Padres has been downright dreadful.  Alternative –  Carson Fulmer Anthony Raunado  I know Raunado hasn’t been too hot since his first start at Wrigley, but giving him a little run is worth a lot more than watching James Shields get to 20 losses (sorry Biguns). Other ideas – Bullpen game or use the Rays 5th starter idea (this is when the Rays would start a high leverage reliever for the 1st inning and then bring in a starter in the 2nd inning and have them face roughly 18 batters to avoid the 3rd time through the lineup penalty)
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Playing Edward Mc 40 Hands? F Yeah.
4. Brett Lawrie – If he recovers we don’t really need to see him again, we know what he is……………high energy, meh production, major injury risk.  Alternative – Carlos Sanchez I know his OPS is lower than the weight of some of our fellow Sox fans, but he’s still young, hasn’t had a lot of PA’s in MLB and could possibly show something that either the White Sox or some other team in trade may find valuable.  The glove has been there, but I’d like to see some more PA’s to determine if he can be passable with the bat.  Other ideas – Tyler Saladino is clearly still a bench player on this team next year so no harm in him getting the PAs
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Love my friend. Love his wife more.

 

3. Avisail Garcia – He’s received nearly 1500 PA, for a slash line of .259/.310/.384, that’s right folks, he’s Dayan Viciedo with even less power.  Suffice to say, he shouldn’t be on this roster next year unless full scale rebuild is occurring and you are just looking for warm bodies to help you gather up a top 5 draft pick.  Alternatives – Jason Coats has done nothing but hit at the top levels of the minors, so there isn’t a good reason not to give him as many PA’s in September as possible.  Let’s see if he can actually hit in the majors and determine from there his best use (probably in a trade, or in LF after trading Melky).   Other Ideas – Tyler Saladino could get worked out in a corner OF spot just to give him reps for emergencies in the future.  Again, this isn’t a minors loaded with ready OF’s or hitters (RIP Charlie Tilson).  Other Other Ideas – Jacob May it truly could not hurt to see Jacob May man CF a few times during September, I just want to put an eye on him even if he’s not really a player.  If JB Shuck absorbs any of this playing time, you know we’re fucked.
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Might be the last time we ever post this picture. EL NINO!
2. Matt Albers – His career is probably over so there is no upside here other than tanking for a protected draft pick.  There was a time in April of this vary season (when the White Sox were the best team EVAR) that Albers was a fan favorite of the 108, El Nino…………now, he’s basically become Chris Farley in Beverly Hills Ninja, once beloved, but now just playing out the string and close to the end.  Alternatives – Zach Burdi Anything Other Ideas – Release him tomorrow
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Dollar Shave Club brah. 
1.  Alex Avila – I see no point in playing anyone at catcher other than Omar Narvaez, with a sprinkling of Kevan Smith.     Let’s see an extended look and determine if Narvaez is your #1 catcher next year in a rebuild or your #2 catcher next year on a team making another (sigh) run.  Alternatives – Omar Narvaez  Other Ideas – Omar Narvaez………just fucking play him everyday and twice on Sunday!!!!

– BeefLoaf

The 5 – My week without the White Sox

This is pretty much a “What I did on my Summer Vacation” article.  I never go to write those as a kid, so I’ll do it now.  And to clarify, It wasn’t so much because our teachers didn’t care, but they wanted to stay blissfully ignorant of the child labor laws that were most likely being broken over those summers.  That said, this is about what I did instead of watching the Sox this week.

Monday – Olympics

It was an off day for the Sox, so I didn’t have much choice.  So I watched the Olympics.  I had heard so much about the horrible conditions of Rio, that I was really expecting to see a guy rowing a twin size mattress through the Amazon with chupacabras chasing him.  Instead I saw a bunch of sports that nobody watches anytime other than when the Olympics are on.  Overall, there were definitely some incredible athletes representing their respective countries quite admirably.  And I am sure I’ll get to see them again in either Cirque Du Soleil, Subway commercials, or CDC quarantines.

SAO PAULO, BRAZIL - DECEMBER 04: Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps and Pele (L) attend a Subway press conference to promote healthy living and lifestyle among children on December 04, 2013 in Sao Paulo, Brazil. (Photo by Rafael Neddermeyer/Getty Images)

Tuesday – DOFH

I went out for some $3 Surly Hell Lagers right after work.  It was nice to sit on a roof top deck, drinks some reasonably priced draughts, and watch an over-served girl get carted out by paramedics.  That’s what Tuesday is all about.  After doing that, I was a bit tipsy, so I just watched this on repeat instead of the Sox

Wednesday – Sumac

A friend told me Sumac was playing at Township and we should head up there.  I obliged and ended up doing something I hadn’t ever done: I bought ear plugs at a show.  Now let me explain, this is not me getting old (though I am), this is a band bringing in enough gear to play the United Center in a 150 capacity room.  That said, it was awesome.  Interesting side note, I saw multiple people wearing Sox gear.  So I guess the Sox have finally made in-roads with the much sought after noise metal community.

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Thursday – Bears

Awful.

SAN FRANCISCO - NOVEMBER 12: Jay Cutler #6 of the Chicago Bears lies on the grass against the San Francisco 49ers at Candlestick Park on November 12, 2009 in San Francisco, California. The 49ers won 10-6. (Photo by Jed Jacobsohn/Getty Images)

Friday – Beefloaf’s Place

So I didn’t make it through without watching any Sox.  I caught some at Beefloaf’s place, since he would not let me watch A-Rod’s final game as a Yankee.  But that’s ok, because A-Rod will be on the Sox in no time and I’ll get to see him in person.  Plus, we ended up spending most of our time talking about North Korea’s dominance in the Olympics.

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So what did I learn?  Nothing.  I rarely learn anything. because I’m an old stubborn jerk.  But overall it was nice to take a break, but nothing really compares to baseball, so I’ll see you on Friday in the 108.

-Chorizy-E

Sox/Cubs Games at US Cellular Field SUCK!

All right, someone had to say it: Sox/Cubs games at US Cellular Field Suck!  The reason youdon’t realize this is that Sox and Cubs fans are “supposed” to have a stupid rivalry (we don’t) and Pud Selig sold everyone on why inter-league play is so great (it’s fine, but all the other leagues do it and don’t make a big deal about it)………..but these games blow…..

FIGHTS

I’ll admit, I enjoyed those backyard fighting videos of Kimbo Slice back in the day as much as the next guy, but what I don’t really enjoy is a fight breaking out every half inning between two knuckleheads that can’t handle their booze/got cuckold’d last weekend/were recently fired from their job……….whatever.  I’m here to enjoy a ball game, not watching a slap and tickle fight between idiots.  Fights not only cause a disturbance to those around the activity, but they also increase scrutiny from security and discourage people from being willing to bring their families…..

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Security don’t play.

OVER SERVED FANS

We in the 108 have been known to take down a beverage or two, but the Sox/Cubs games bring out the worst in people consuming………a few years back we had some rough looking fellows sitting a row back of us in the 108.  One of their party had a little too much fun and in the 2nd inning, had, what they call in the eating competitions, a “reversal of fortune”……….that was no fun………….in fact, the 108’ers had their own day in which they consumed too much Limoncello before the game…..BeefLoaf decided to remove himself from the ballpark in the 5th inning, not to be heard from until the next day.  It gets ugly.

Really, it’s amateur hour.  It’s the only thing that rivals St Patrick’s Day, because it has all the same elements as a St Patty’s Day bar at 10pm: there’s a fight, there’s a guy puking, there’s a girl crying, and for some unknown reason, people are in John Barleycorn’s.

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“Puke and rally beeeeeeeeotch!”

CROSSTOWN CUP

Shut the fuck up with this.

It is a fake rivarly……….we all know it…………..as much as the media has always tried to pin Sox fans vs Cubs fans, we really don’t hate each other, and we really couldn’t give a fuck about each others’ teams other than some good natured ball busting.  Most years, at least one of the teams is horrible, so the stakes are meh.  I remember watching Darin Erstad try to make a diving catch in CF and his career being over…….nobody wants to see that.  It is only exacerbated by the stupid BP Cup (which was extra fun after the oil spill)…….it’s Chicago baseball’s participation trophy.

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Ozzie showed up at Dugans with this. No one cared.

THE SOX WILL SWEEP

The Sox have shown their true colors and it is time for a tear down.  But you and I both know, they’ll sweep this series or at least win it and give people a false sense of hope.  And of course, this is right before the deadline.

– BeefLoaf and Chorizy-E

The 5 – Bobbleheads and Bo.

Growing up I remember teams, the 1989 “Flyin’ Illini”, 91-93 Bulls, ’85 Bears, but besides Jordan, Bo Jackson was one of the biggest sports figures in my life.  I loved Bo.  I have a huge card collection of only Bo’s.  I bought sets to just get Bo’s that I needed. Watching Bo go down in that football game was hard.  But when the Sox picked him up, I was over the moon.  My first White Sox game was his second game back, he homered.  I lost my shit.  I have the posters.  I have the shirts.  I have his book.

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Many years later, when Bo was gonna be at SoxFest, I was amped. I went home to get my “The Ball Player” poster for him to sign.  Then I found out that Bo doesn’t sign that picture, at all, anymore.  For those of you not familiar with SoxFest, most guys will sign anything you give them.  But Bo and Carlton Fisk have only been signing free pics that the Sox give out when they appear at SoxFest.  No outside items.  Seriously.  If you want Bo to sign a different item, he won’t.   I understand this for a couple reasons.

It’s how he makes his nut.

Bo’s career was short, he didn’t make a bunch of money from sports.  Endorsements?  Maybe.  But it’s a nice retirement package charging $100+ a signature.  I respect that.

People sell his stuff, why can’t he?

I get that too.  I would be pissed if I did something that commanded a certain value and I didn’t get my share.  It’s just the way it is.  I don’t fault him for that.

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Why are we talking about this? In case you missed it, the Sox released the first official Bo Jackson bobblehead.  It’s a beaut.  You can purchase it here from the Sox. Part of the money goes to charity, good cause. I bought a bunch at the game.  I have a pretty big bobble collection and collect mostly White Sox. I trade with other people and Bo is a huge figure in the bobble world.  In my limited experience with this bobble game, the cheapest the bobble will ever be is when it first comes out.  As time goes by the price goes up due to less being available.  That has been sorta skewed as more people are buying more to sell, so the market stays flooded longer than it had been a few years before.  I have written about bobbles before, you can read that here.

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Do I sell bobbles for profit?  Absolutely.  I take risks buying multiple tickets, multiple bobbles, all in the hopes it will go up in price.  Sometimes you cash in early, sometimes it takes time.  I usually hold onto stuff, most of the time it works, sometimes it doesn’t.  I have lost money, but I have also made enough money to make it worthwhile to take these calculated risks.  So yeah, I saw this Bo as chance to trade for some harder to get items and maybe sell a few.

The White Sox being the White Sox sold this online before they did at the park.  Which kinda sucks if you go to games.  I know the idea is to sell them, but don’t you want people at the park? I think that more people would make the trip over or in to pickup this bobble this weekend.  Sell it online after the first weekend it is available, but let us fans that go regularly get treated special.

If you don’t know, for people that check in with the MLB Ballpark App the Sox give out prizes when you show up.  The give you a free shirt for 1 check in, which is awesome.  Great to give the kids and adults something to bring home.  But as you get more and more check in’s,  the prizes get better.  For 50 games you get a Golden Chris Sale bobble head.  A few weeks ago, before the 50 home game mark, they gave out the bobbles to people that Tweeted something.  Seriously?  The guys making it to 50 games don’t get it first?  Just rubs me (and other collectors) the wrong way.  I don’t fault them, but it just feels like we got slighted in this case.

So yesterday, I posted some Bo’s online.  I posted them before I got them because, ‘Merica.  I was the first listed, and yep, it was listed at a high price.  If you don’t know about Ebay, listed prices are not selling prices.  Just because I listed it for $125, doesn’t mean I got that for it when (and if) it sold.  I have been selling stuff on Ebay for years, I buy stuff that way too.  I sold 1, for much less than my $125 asking price, but enough to make it worth my time.  Within hours more and more people listed for much less than me, but all still higher than the asking price from the Sox.  That’s business.  That’s how it works.

Thursday night, I got a text with an article about the Bo bobble.  Bo was quoted saying this-

He was not happy to see one for sale for $125 online Thursday morning. As a result, he said he won’t be signing them. “The thing that bothers me is we do this for a good cause but you have those hustlers out there that buy them and put them online,” he said.

My childhood hero, the guy who hawked stuff that I bought, called me a hustler in the Trib.  Fucking badass.  What is a hustler?  The FIRST definition is “an enterprising person determined to succeed; go-getter.”  Wow.  Bo Jackson recognizes my talent and he doesn’t even know me!  (Well, we’ve met once, but I doubt I made any impression on him.)  Other definitions are not as nice, but reselling something at a higher price than it is offered in other places isn’t illegal.  It shouldn’t even be looked down upon.  Just like professional athletes making as much money as they can, they should be a hustler too.  Get you some.  I am all for it.  We as fans shouldn’t bitch either, we support it.

What I don’t like is him using that as an excuse on why he won’t sign them when he wasn’t gonna sign them anyways.  Why was Bo on Ebay looking up his bobblehead? Why does he even care?  I think the author told him about it, but come on Bo, you wouldn’t have signed them anyways and I don’t fault you for that.  I know he has signed custom bobbles before, wasn’t happy about them, but he did it cause he was paid to do it.  So, maybe if you pay him he will still sign it for you.  But if he doesn’t and I ruined this for everyone, sorry guys.  But right now I am the silent fall guy for my childhood hero.  And that is fine, I will do that for you Bo.  I owe ya for all the years of entertainment.

MidSeason Grades from the 108

Midseason Grades
A couple of footnotes to the grades, Chorizy-E went with Pass/Fail as he believes that is how everything should be graded.  MSS offered up an “Incomplete” for Twitter, as he doesn’t believe much in Twittering.
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Beer Vendors
Over in the 108, this is easily the most important grade. We got this shit on lockdown.  Hell, BeefLoaf and Slumpbuster have our regular beer guys on speed dial so they don’t waste their precious time coming by till be get there.  Brian, James and Richard are top notch and take great care of us.  However, if you are sitting in the upper deck…it is a bad area….a wasteland if you will.  Easily lost multiple sales because they NEVER come around.  Sometimes we save money on tickets to buy beer folks, but if we don’t have the opportunity to purchase, well, yeah.  So treat the “up high guys” the same as the lowers.
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Fans (in stadium)
Wow.  We went from selling 100k tickets in a week, to listing 1000 tickets a day on StubHub.  The fans were awesome when we were winning, not so much when the drecks of the bad losing streak hit.  We don’t expect full houses anytime soon.  White Sox fans in the stadium actually know the game better than you might think, we like to think 99% of fans are just there to eat hot dogs and drink beer, which is mostly correct, but the 108’ers tend to run into people who actually have a clue and who are very social.  Especially opposing team fans, which is always questionable………unfortunately, too many of you still engage in the wave, which is the equivalent of having AOL as your internet provider or  asking someone to fax you some information.  The wave may have been fun/cool at some point, but that point is 20 years in our rear view, now its equal parts obnoxious and pointless.  If you don’t believe me, watch our video here.  Overall, White Sox fans are generally friendly and conversational, with the occasional fall down drunk (more occasional in the 108).
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White Sox Twitter
I’m a big fan of the White Sox Twitter community.  They’re very active and unlike most social media, I see people actually asking questions and getting solid answers.  This builds a more informed, more cohesive fan base.  Of course there are some complete lunatics, but it’s the internet, so that’s gonna happen.  But, White Sox Twitter also clearly suffers from bipolar disorder…….one minute, Sox are the best team in baseball, the next, they should get contracted Expos style………Tyler Saladino is the equivalent of the Bears backup QB, everyone knows he isn’t very good, but they still want him in the lineup at all costs, even at DH………..the group is very split on JB Shuck, the sane folks know he really sucks and shouldn’t play everyday, the unsane would like him out there at all costs……..in fairness, this is what you have to work with when you watch 162 baseball games of a mediocre team.  White Sox Twitter has been really on point with the fans’ feelings of the team, they make the game viewing experience very fun, even when the team sucks.  I think collectively, as a group, we need to work in Crying Jordan more, but that is just me.
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Robin Ventura
Like a wet luke warm towel in a locker room, RV is still around.  Is it luke warm cause it was recently pissed on?  Maybe.  Cause it wasn’t fully dry when it came out of the dryer?  Maybe.  Why are we talking about towels?  Cause they are far more interesting than RV and his managing style.  Just read this article to get the unabridged version of what we think of RV.
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Rick Hahn
We are fans of Rick Hahn, but trying to figure out “the Plan” is sort of like following the plot of True Detective 2, you think you sort of almost have it and then Jimmy Rollins and Mat Latos die and you are back to square one.  To his credit he has discarded his old and broken toys for other people’s old and broken toys……..ah, who are we kidding, if it weren’t for Tim Anderson, this team would be trending down towards the Twins, which is possibly what they need, but right now, we want to watch them play well.  There is so little depth on this team, someone has to take the blame for that.  If you lose the CF you picked up 30 seconds before the season started, the whole team should not fall to pieces, and we certainly should not have to watch JB Shuck.  Not to mention you rostered Jerry Sands for what seemed to be forever.  We think Hahn was in a weird spot this year, between trying to compete and keep the White Sox 3 high draft picks………..think in that respect, he mostly did what he could, but again the team is in the dreggs of the middle class (we know, we know, the middle class is gone in the US).
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The Organization
Rough one.  They try so fucking hard. we are friends with many folks in the front office in all different areas. We would say overall, this year has been pretty smooth so far. We feel like they have had some solid giveaways.  The t-shirts have been bomb, wish it was a Monday not a Thursday, but whatevs.  Lots of folks are getting there to get them.  They have started doing special tickets for special bobbleheads too, which we love.  We also love that they discount the tickets.  We also love that MSS does make us go through the line a bunch of times to get extras. MSS really hope this continues and they offer this for the regular release bobbles too.  Even the red shirts have done a better job this year.   The organization hasn’t really pissed me off and they are clearly trying to make positive changes.
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Announcers
Jason Benetti is carrying this sorry group.  He is a breath of fresh air and he is already making the broadcast 100x better with new segments and fun interactive stuff for the fans (even if we realize that @ssspnoles and @cswear12 have the cheat code for #SoxMath).  He also allows Steve Stone to actually talk and they actually interact in a fun way.  Especially like the one inning a game where Jason really gets to break Stoney’s balls about how bad he did against certain hitters from his past.  We suspect that Benetti will get stolen by ESPN or MLB Network at some point, so we should really try to enjoy this while it lasts.  One negative point against Benetti, he dissed us with our welcome sign and never acknowledged it on TV.  That ain’t cool.
Steve Stone is still good, not as good as he used to be, but that is only because with the pervasiveness of advanced stats that help the average fan understand the game better.
Hawk is done, but we get so many insane quotes from him, we can deal with it for the rest of the year.  His main highlights of the year have been when he couldn’t see if a ground rule double (aka bounce home run) was a homer or a double and had to ask Stoney (mind you, he has a monitor 3 inches from him that he could look at) and when he left the booth for an inning to check on Todd Frazier when Frazier got hurt in Texas.  He’ll probably blame the umps for this bad rating we are giving him.
Farmio and DJ are a good listen if you think of them as an old married couple.  I think that’s what they’re going for, so I’ll pretend it’s on purpose……….however, if your intention was to actually know what is going on in the game they aren’t such a good listen………..when they actually do talk about the game, Farmio rarely knows wtf is going on and often gives incorrect information.  DJ would probably be better off with a better partner, because Farmio is slipping big time, but considering it is the White Sox, they’ll probably extend him for another 5 years.
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Technology
We love the ballpark app (except for the feature that allows you to order food, because that food shan’t arrive, EVAR). We love that they give you stuff for checking in.  Sadly, this year it has been mostly bullshit.  Last year we had free apps at ChiSox every weekend it seemed.  And those coupons were good till the end of the season.  Now they are only good for that game.  So if BigUns buys us all pretzels or something in the 8th, we still have to go get the free apps even if we aren’t that hungry for wings (which is rare, but can happen).  Yes, they lost a TON of money on that promo last year from the 108.  But guess what?  We also bought a TON of tall boy High Life’s at $7 each.  Seriously.  We can buy a case of High Life for $3 more.  A case! So give me some free fucking wings!
On another note, one of the goals of Ballpark App is at 50 check in’s, you get a Golden Chris Sale Bobblehead. Which is awesome.  What is not awesome is that they GAVE THE DAMN THINGS AWAY ON SOCIAL MEDIA NIGHT IN THE TWITTER VENDING MACHINE. So all the guys who have been going to every game  just got scooped by some douche that tweeted “Go Sox! 456789”  That was cold guys, especially since we are only in the 40’s for home games.  You could have waited, but in true Sox fashion, blew the load early.
New scoreboard is nice, but that’s about it.  They’re trying to do more with social media, but there is not much of interest there.  There is still not a way to use a credit card with vendors.  They do very little to go about seeing what their season ticket holders spend in the stadium or what they spend it on.  There are a lot of improvements to be made across the MLB in terms of in-stadium technology and you think they would lead the way since they have so many games as opposed to a sport like football.  But they do not.  Good news though, Comiskey Cash is still a thing, for some stupid reason.

The 5 – Why I Can’t Hate Minnesota.

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Detroit.  Yup.  You can hate it.  How can you not?

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Cleveland.  Kinda.  Harder than Detroit to hate but they have more to offer than just empty buildings.

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Kansas City?  BBQ FOOL. I can’t hate KC for 2 other reasons too.  Bo Jackson & a cool logo.

But even better than KC is Minneapolis.  Have you been?  Place is amaze balls. People are nice. Beer is good. And they like to get down.  Any city that produced Prince, Charles Shulz and The Coen Brothers is ok by me. Here’s my top 5 reasons why I can’t hate on the Twin Cities, but not the Twins. I only need one reason to hate the Twins. Joe Mauer.  #suckitmauer

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“TC” Logo

Man.  I wish, I so wish, I could wear this hat.  But it’s the fucking Twins,  fuck the Twins.  It is a classic. Simple, yet so strong.  As a designer, I love it.  Shows pride.  Unlike Chicago with our violent North vs South battle, the folks in MN decided 2 is better than 1. Which brings us to……

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Minnesota Nice.

It’s a mantra.  Having experienced it first hand a few times, people are just nicer.  Maybe it’s because they are housebound for months on end, maybe they are just better people.  I don’t know.  But I do know that I got a serious friendly vibe in MN.

Atmosphere, Brother Ali & Rhymesayers Entertainment!

Back in the day I was convinced that I would enjoy California because most of the bands I liked were based in California.  I lived there for 7 years, fucking spot on, besides the traffic. In 2003 I was introduced to Atmosphere.  If you haven’t heard of them, wow, just wow.  Go pick up When Life Gives You Lemons You Paint That Shit Gold, which is one of my favorite albums of all time.  I have seen them live multiple times.  Just a great show.  My first show was in Long Beach, CA amazing.  The second show was in Pomona, CA at the legendary Glasshouse with Brother Ali.  Brother Ali is an albino Muslim who was raised in a black neighborhood. I had my doubts that first show, but goddamn, he kills it.  I have seen them both perform in MN too, at their huge Hip hop show Soundset.  Went two years in a row, pretty amazing.

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Surly Brewery

In 2010, I met up with some friends at Brits.  We drank on the roof and had a great time.  I downed several pints of Guinness.  The following year I found myself at Brits again and watched as person after person ordered some unknown beer.  I made a comment to my brother-in-law about how this beer must be amazing and seconds after I said that a taster appeared in front of me. 6 pints later not only was I loving life but also drunk as hell.  It was Surly Furious. Now you can get this all over the midwest, but back then you couldn’t.  Shits amazing.  A solid APA/ESB that I credit with really getting me into craft beer.  Fresh is even better.  Check these guys out if you get the chance, you can get 2 of their offerings at the Cell, Furious and Hell.

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Prince

Do I have to explain?  The guy wrote amazing lyrics and songs. He also plays better guitar than all other people combined. What more do you need?  Plus his old club downtown First Avenue is just an amazing joint.  Drug use and religion aside, the guy changed the game. He also had hometown pride.  He NEVER left.  He build his city up.  Respect.

-MSS

The Non-Beer Options – By Quernzy

Quernzy is the lovely partner/wife/drinking buddy to our very own Chorizy-E.  She likes a good time, even though she married a guy who looks like her grandpa (if her grandpa was mexican and had grey hair).  She also is majorly famous having appeared in many movies and TV shows.  Check her out on IMDB. Huge sports fan, it runs in her blood, as her mom’s favorite movie of all time is Rocky (and she was a season ticket holder for the O’s and Ravens).

If you’re still watching the White Sox, you’re probably drinking way more alcohol. And sometimes a beer may not be strong enough when the other team is about to score their 10th run. So I did you a favor and tested out all the non-beer options on the concourse level of US Cellular Field.

Frozen Zone

Many of you will probably start off a game by heading to the “Frozen Zone” near the bleachers and pick up a Frozen Mango Daiquiri in an obnoxious souvenir cup that you’ll never use again. But after a few sips, you will regret that decision. They are way too sweet and you will have a headache to prove it. Not to mention, a ridiculous cup that looks like you just left a horrible bachelorette party.

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Vendors

Opt instead for a Frozen Margarita from the vendors in the aisles. Delicious! And just the right amount to finish before it melts. Some have Frozen Vodka Lemonade, equally good.  Unfortunately, there are not a lot of these vendors, so keep an eye out for them.

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Cocktails

One of my favorite non-frozen cocktails at the park is a Vodka Lemonade near Section 106 at the “K”orner Beer Stand. While you are over there, check out the Xfinity Bar near Section 108. They have a specialty cocktail menu and The ChiSox Mule is worth the long lines at the bar.  If the park is packed, be prepared to wait for half an inning (aka an entire James Shields start).

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And for something a little different – try the coffee with a shot of Baileys and get a souvenir mug at the “Winning Ugly is Sweet” Stand at Section 143.  Now that it’s summer, this might not be the best choice, but don’t worry, the stadium will be cold and empty in just a few short months.

Overall, there are plenty of non-beer options on the first level and given the Sox recent play, you’re gonna need them.

– Quernzy

Follow Quernzy here!

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Do we really need “Guys Night”?

What are we talking about here?

The White Sox from time to time come up with promotions to try to fill seats.  Some of them are very successful like Halfway to St Pat’s or Elvis Night.  But some, some are not so good.  I present you with Guys Night.

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So what is the insanely cool thing that makes this “Guys Night”?

Ticket prices are discounted, which is nice, but there is also a giveaway.  It’s a hat, and from the image looks kind of cool, but two problems here:

  1. Hats are about the most unisex giveaway possible
  2. Hat vouchers are limited to the first 500 tickets purchased

The first 500?  This is about 9500 short of a normal giveaway.

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I’m not quite sure what makes this “Guys Night” or even what would entice you to go to this.  Maybe they can go with the fact that it will be the last time you’ll get to see Bryce Harper at the Cell for a long while?  I mean, unless the Sox and Nats play in the World Series.

So I guess it’s a promotion to get 500 more people in the seats to see the reigning National League MVP .

Why do we need this?

I’m sure you’ve visited the park and thought to yourself “I wish there were more guys here.”  I think in general, the Sox want more people in the seats, but I think that ratio is typically a majority guys and you’ve probably topped out in that portion of the market.

I guess they may see this as a way to sell more beer at the park on a Thursday night and maybe they’re right.  And when has that ever worked out poorly for the Sox?

Security officials remove one of two men who jumped from the stands and attacked Kansas City Royals first base coach Tom Gamboa with their fists in the ninth inning against the Chicago White Sox Thursday, Sept. 19, 2002, at Comiskey Park in Chicago. Gamboa had a large cut on his forehead and was holding a towel to his face, but he walked off the field under his own power to a standing ovation from the crowd. (AP Photo/Ted S. Warren)

So why do we need this?  We don’t.

Like most things in life, Dave Chappelle has already shown why this is a terrible idea.

 

– Chorizy-E

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The 5 – Overweight Heroes

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From left – Matt “Cat” Albers, his SMOKING HOT WIFE. Gives all fat/rich guys hope.

If you haven’t watched the wonderful 13th inning of the Sox/Mets game from last Wednesday, where 108’s fave Matt “El Nino” Albers starred, please do yourself a fuggin’ service and go back and watch it!  In light of this virtuoso performance from El Nino, it has inspired me to write about 5 of my favorite overweight heroes

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Don’t ever change.
5. Bartolo Colon – It’s cliche, but watching Colon do just about anything is like poetry in motion, he’s everything you want in a #fatthlete he looks weird and awkward doing athletic things, but he also has a sort of grace in doing them……..he makes you think that you could get off your couch and hit your first home run at Petco Park at age 43.
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4. Aretha Franklin – An all-time great voice in music history, but she didn’t get the nickname “the Queen of SoulFood” for no reason.  She made it okay for Ann Wilson to become as robust as she did and she laid the ground work for the future Kelly Clarkson’s  and Adele’s of the world.
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3. Buddha aka “Siddhartha Gautama” – If half of the world is following your teachings, your way of life, you are a major hero……………Buddha was a big boy, especially in his day…..now, he’d probably be your average Milwaukee Walmart shopper, but still brilliant and insightful……..and some great big ears as well.
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In the end, maybe he needed it more than Walter.
2. William “the Refridgerator” Perry – Needs no introduction, he was the first high profile 300 pounder in the NFL………now, 20% of the league is pushing 300 pounds…….he had his own cheerleaders, he was in every commercial, he scored a touchdown in the SuperBowl………..facts are though, he was a fantastic athlete, I once saw him do a 2 hand dunk at a charity basketball game……Fridge was a freak, but belongs well up on this list.
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Our very own MSS (looking well fed) with the Hedgehog.
1. Ron Jeremy – I am not sure how many of you have actually viewed an adult film, but those of you who have, Ron Jeremy is the first seriously fat male superstar in the trade.  He’s also shown up in dozens of regular films, including prominently being featured in the Chase with Charlie Sheen (hard to believe they are friends)……

– BeefLoaf