The 60 / 40 Split the Pot Raffle

Split the Pot raffles are the goddamn basis of any local community. If anyone is running a fundraiser for any fucking thing that we need, a good Split the Pot raffle always slides in there and gets the job done. Whether it’s the Church, or the local School or the Little League or even that guy that has a bit of a pill problem that got “hurt on the job”, and now won’t be able to make ends meet…regardless, it’s a staple of Chicago life.

I enjoy these things, just because I got a little gamble in me. That’s right, nothing wrong with throwing some money in the pot (responsibly) and seeing if you can turn that shit into more money. In fact, most of you fucking prudes don’t do this enough!!!

Most of us just blindly assume that these things are split 50 / 50, also known as 50% to the cause and 50% to the winner of the raffle. Some organizations go as far as to explicitly note the fifty-fiftiness of the contest.

But did you ever wonder if these things are actually split 50 / 50….well I got one story…

The 60 / 40 Raffle

The names of the organization and person involved in this story will be kept materially confidential to protect them from scrutiny under their otherwise flawless reputation. Back home, years ago, Chorizy-E and I happened to be attending an event at an organization that we have strong ties to going back to when we were wee little lads. This is most likely the late 1990’s when this is occurring. At some point in the weekend long event an authority figure who we know well, the matriarch of a family in our neighborhood that may or may not have had a long standing business that has just closed down in the last 12 months ish came up to us and asked if we could “help” with the Raffle. Being the charitable type folks we are, we immediately said “YES”.

Upon a short walk to the specified area where “OFFICIAL RAFFLE BUSINESS” was about to be conducted (a 30 year old half busted wooden folding table), this person hit us with something so shocking to my very being that I couldn’t believe it. They said….

“Please take the money and Split the Pot, but instead of 50 / 50, you are good at math, please split this one 60 / 40.”

Chorizy-E and I shot a quick look at each other, now we are cautious dudes, particularly cautious in situations like this. I had some internal questions in that moment.

Are we being set up for some bullshit? Not likely, this is an environment where we are super well known and have impeccable reputations. Why are we being chosen for this unscrupulous task? I don’t really know, but it’s surely not for our math skills. Maybe we just know how to shut the fuck up about stuff. Is this a joke?

We both wait a beat to see if there is some joke coming and it never arrives. So, we agree to the task, whack up the loot 60% to the house, 40% to whatever poor fuck has no idea they are getting gouged for the other 10%. I don’t think we stayed at the event that day much longer, not necessarily because of this, but because, well we had some other shit going. But that has never left me since that day. The next time you throw into a pot for some seemingly benign charity raffle, think twice. The next time some sketchy character rolls up to sell you tickets to a “charity raffle”…..

think about this story…..I know I always do.

-BeefLoaf