Hello friends. I’m so fascinated by the man who’s phrase that is, Jim Nantz is such a freak, did yous guys know he likes his toast burnt a certain way, and he is so fucking particular that he carries a picture of how he’d like his toast burnt around with him everywhere? Anywho, today I want to talk Nick Madrigal, and why I think the vast majority of White Sox twitter has a chubby for him and why the 108ers (and Keith Law) don’t.

Nick Madrigal was the 4th overall pick by our #WhiteSox in the 2018 MLB Rule 4 Amateur draft

From the moment he was selected, I saw members of #WhiteSox twitter anointing him the 2nd baseman of the future!!! Many folks were already trying to figure out odd lineup configurations moving around many of the teams other young players to accommodate Nick in the current lineup. The more bullish of the crowd saw Nick as a Shortstop, even though he did not play Shortstop in college. The White Sox claiming to “try him out” at shortstop (he only played 1 minor league game at shortstop in 2018) stoked this fire even more.

WE HAVE A REPLACEMENT FOR TIM ANDERSON!!!

I heard lewd comparisons to Jose Altuve and Dustin Pedroia (Madrigal is small, like really small, like 5’6″ and weighs slightly more than my biggest cat) as his comps and how he might even be better than them dudes. I saw people projecting .380 OBP for him in his prime. The excitement seemed insane to me, and believe you me, I am happy to get excited about shit that seems impossible, I’m a White Sox season ticket holder. I’m not sure how many players under 5’9″ have been top 5 picks this century, but it surely wasn’t many. Again, he is listed at 165 lbs, and this is a College Junior, not a High School kid that has yet to fill out. I don’t know how many folks of this weight or under have been picked this high in recent memory, but it can’t be a lot. I was told not to worry about any of that stuff, this kid has elite bat control and is the most polished hitter in this draft. He also doesn’t strike out, like hardly ever. The White Sox were just concluding a season in which they would set the all-time single season strike out record. Does not striking out really matter that much if you don’t hit the ball hard enough for it to go over the fence? I was confused. I wasn’t seeing what everyone else was.

The way I saw Madrigal, the way I still see Madrigal is that he looks like the guy on your little league team that was really good in little league and never got any better because all he could really do was put the ball in play all the time. In Little League, that’s a fucking terrific strategy, because you don’t have elite athletes covering materially all of the diamond, you have a fat kid at 3b who might catch a ball if you line it directly into his fat rolls. At 2b, you probably have a kid who looks like he should be able to play baseball, but really can’t. Your OF’s aren’t too splendid either. Yes, they are coordinated enough to ride their bike to the park, but their defensive baseball skills end at retrieving a ball, not “playing it”. See where I am going with this? If your entire skill set is never striking out, you are likely to be a star as long as catching the ball is a big problem. As you rise up the ranks, just putting the ball in play is a very tough strategy to execute. This is not to mention the pitchers knowing this shit as well. Oy vey.

Chorizy and I have been on the opposite side of the consensus on this from the get-butt. Mind you, this isn’t contrarianism for contrarianisms sake, this is two dudes, drinking a lot and talking shit and coming to the same goddamn conclusion. Now, you know us, you know the 108ers, if we think something, we are happy to tell you….we are also happy to listen to your opinion, that’s how conversations work. I for one am often confused by prospect talk. I know nothing about scouting, I couldn’t tell you dick about a guys swing or how he brings his ubula through the zone. I don’t know how the hips are supposed to be used, I take all my hips positioning advice from Chubbs Peterson. So this sort of commentary is taking the 10,000 ft view. I’m using empiricism and probability and most of it doesn’t agree with the consensus.

Anywho, when thinking about this, I just looked around and realized, hey, there aren’t many tiny players that become stars and the ones that have become stars have been long shots to do so. Also, the current MLB player needs to basically hit for power OR have an elite defensive profile at a premium position (like SS, because even Billy Hamilton was non-tendered), like Andrelton Simmons. Otherwise, it is very tough to be much of a player in this MLB. As I tried to come up with comparisons in profile, the only two players that seemed similar in playing style to Madrigal (good contact hitter without much power and good defender at 2b) from what I could dream up were DJ LeMaheiu (6-4 215 lbs) and Joe Panik (6-1 200 lbs), both decent players, but not stars, also these dudes are way huger than Madrigal. The truth is, the world where guys like Madrigal is a really good player is a dream world. Jose Altuve is basically a fucking Chupacabra, Madrigal ain’t becoming him, Altuve hits the ball really fucking hard. Dustin Pedroia has to be the 99th percentile outcome of Madrigal, he’ll need to add good weight and really start smacking the ball hard. When I say good weight, I don’t mean the type of weight that me and Wally$ are carrying, right around the old spare tire area, that weight is fine when creating the “motion in the ocean”, but not as good for impacting a baseball hard.

 

What I am saying is, without some changes, the dude as is ain’t becoming them dudes, in fact, we might be lucky to sneak a David Eckstein type guy out of him. A good player for a couple of years, that sort of declines into infield Jon Jay (a guy with no power, some speed and nice on-base skills), that’s workable, but that player doesn’t seem to cost too much on the open market (see Jon Jay’s career earnings). That player also doesn’t really need to play all the time. That’s basically Leury Garcia‘s role, well, Leury Garcia if he couldn’t grab a glove and fake the outfield. You don’t usually need to draft that 4th overall. Look, I’ll probably be way wrong on this and all of you will be right. You’ll be able to tell me “I TOLD YOU SO”…..the lineups you crafted where you had to move Moncada to Point Guard and Tim Anderson to Running Back to fit Madrigal into the lineup where he belongs, at the only position he can play, Second Base will be right and you’ll be able to piss in my Cheerios (as they used to say)…..but this is just my dumb, uneducated take, what do the fucking experts think….where is he rated on the top 100 prospect lists for 2019?

Baseball America – 43rd

MLB Pipeline – 47th

Baseball Prospectus – 15th

Oh fuck, I guess I’m a dumbass…..but wait……

Keith Law – Just missed top 100 (listed 12th on his list of players that missed)

FINALLY!!!! Someone that isn’t a dumbass like myself, sort of agrees with this uphill battle ole Nicky boy is probably facing. Now, most of you reading this will be like, oh, but Keith Law hates the White Sox. I am pretty sure what I have read from Keith Law, most fans thinks he hates their team. That seems pretty consistent, so it isn’t likely he hates the White Sox more than anyone else. I’ll admit, I like Keith Law’s writing, he’s a bit of a prick in his writings, but he’s entertaining and I just like his perspective on baseball stuff. I’ll often check in on his chats (print or live video) and I am glad I did this time, because he talks for 2 mins about our top pick from 2018 in this one, start at the 35 minute mark. Pretty much hits the nail on the head for me.

Of course, I am rooting for Mr. Madrigal, I’d love to be wrong on this stuff. I would much rather be mashing hands with all of you fine folks after an RBI triple by Nicky. I’d love to watch him be a fucking vaccuum cleaner at 2b. I’ve been thinking “MAYBE HE CAN BECOME LIKE JOSE VIDRO”….that would be nice, but I really don’t buy it. I hope to be wrong, dead wrong.

Tell me why I’m wrong, come at me bro

-BeefLoaf

If you’ve paid attention to our blog/videos/podcast at all, you obviously know we love to drink.

You may have also noticed that I really enjoy bourbon and rye. I typically drink it neat. I like to say it’s because I buy higher end stuff for home, but honestly I am very lazy, so making a cocktail is out of the question.

However, when I am out and looking for a cocktail, I mostly stick to the classics: Old Fashioned (my favorite drink AND donut), Sazerac, and Manhattan. The last of these is unfortunately often served in a goddamn martini glass. I absolutely hate those glasses.

• 

For the life of me, I cannot understand this glass. It’s possibly the worst design of anything ever. The delorean’s doors were a better idea than putting a plate on a stick and deciding it should be used for drinks. Not to mention, most drinks you put in this glass are 80-100% booze. What should you give to a drunk person? A very awkward drinking receptacle, so they can spill shit all over the place and probably break the glass.

Look, I get that you have these fantasies of looking all dope like James Bond with your martini glass. Unfortunately, you will look one of two ways with it: a pompous asshat or a stumbling dumbass drunk.

Give me a rocks glass and pour as much booze as you can into it.

-Chorizy-E

PS I have a martini glass tattoo

Make sure to subscribe to the podcast on your favorite podcast provider. Also make sure to subscribe to our YouTube channel and setup notifications, so you don’t miss shenanigans like the stuff below.

Before you go ahead and bet all your hard earned dollars on Super Bowl props, fill out our contest for a chance to win this dope #108ing 8 x 10 Daniel Palka Signature Edition – Autographed!

Welcome friends, this is the 5, inspired by #WhiteSox twitter, which is simultaneously looking to move on from sweating Manny Machado rumors on twitter and can’t stop fucking refreshing twitter looking for said rumors.  Anywho, here are 5 alternatives to continually sweating twitter for those rumors, now, I know what you are thinking, I’m going to tell you to meditate or exercise or some shit like that….I’m not, that’s for overachievers.  We are straight C type students, not showing off, and not falling behind.  This is a list for us.

5 – Eat some pudding

Pudding is delicious and ever since the whole Bill Cosby scandal, pudding, particularly Jello pudding has been getting a bad fucking wrap.  I suggest going to the grocery store, grabbing a couple of fist fulls of chocolate pudding packs and dig in.  You’ll love it so much, you’ll be dancing in the streets singing the praises of pudding and handing off pudding packs to random folks on the street.  You’ll stop thinking about Manny Machado immediately.

4 – Re-Learn the Macarena

That’s right, I have no idea what the big homeys Los Del Rio have been up to since the mid 90’s, but you know and I know that we learned that fucking dance and now we have forgotten it.  A vital piece of our personal history has been trashed in favor of learning about “advanced metrics” or some other bullshit, awful!!  Let’s take back the part of our life when we learned the hip dance of the time period just so we wouldn’t miss out.  Fuck, we can probably get it going in Section 108 during the season if we all just take the time to work it out.  I see a big coordinated scoreboard appearance for us friends.  That’s much more important than Manny Machado.

3 – Play with some puppies

I love dogs and cats.  They are essential to a happy life imo.  If you don’t love house pets you are a horrible menacing curmudgeon of non-humanness.  I recently spent a few hours on MLK Day with Mrs. BeefLoaf and Bonita Steakie at a PetSmart that had an Anti-Cruelty wing to it.  We went in and played with puppies, it was fucking amazing.  It costs $0, it brings joy to the animals and to you.  Why even bother looking at twitter when you can play with puppies.  Manny Machado would want you to do this, in fact, he’s not signing with the White Sox unless you do this shit…RIGHT. DAMN. NOW!!

2 – Read a book

Look, I know the 108 family and friends ain’t necessarily Umberto Eco or some shit like that, but I think we could spend a little more time reading books.  If I had to guess, your subscription to Juggs magazine has just run out, so it might be time to go out and BUY an actual book.  Fuck it!! You can go to the library and just take out a book.  If you have children, read to them, or read with them.  If you don’t find yourself a book that interests you.  I’m not looking for a goddamn book report here, I want you fulfilled in a way that bullshit report tweets by Bob Nightengale won’t do.  I like Nassim Taleb, he’s probably my favorite author…..so maybe check out something in his catalog and tell me if you enjoy it.  Manny Machado probably doesn’t read Nassim Taleb, so you’ll instantly be smarter than him.

1 – Exercise

Alright, I admit, the 108ers don’t look like the fittest crew out there, but you know damn well that a good workout will make you forget about this Manny shit and really enjoy life.  I’m not suggesting you train for a marathon or something, that would be lunacy, how about a 2 mile walk while you listen to some music, or how about you ride a bike.  Look I know the weather sucks but even 90 seconds of doing the old “IN-OUT” with your significant other constitutes “exercise”, I mean, it’ll get your heart rate up and I know for sure you’ll feel better after.  Manny Machado is probably doing the old “IN-OUT” right now, he’s not thinking about you, so why think about him?

 

If you couldn’t make it to the after-party or if you were there and just couldn’t hear these as we made ’em, here’s our bold predictions for 2019:

MySoxSummer
After starting a partnership with the Milk Council, Nick Madrigal will grow a few inches this season.

Just to shut Javi Baez the fuck up, Tim Anderson will have a career year at SS and for good measure Yoan Moncada will slay at 2nd Base.

Jace Fry will NOT be attacked on IG by his new girlfriend that he might or might not have given an STD to. Can confirm he was with a girl last night at Sox Prom. Everyone looked to what player it was, saw it was Fry, we all himmed and hawed.

Although we will tweet about it 1900 times, BeefLoaf and I will still NOT learn the kid and play dance in 2019.

Beefloaf
Lucas Giolito will overcome having Jordan Lazowski as his biggest fan and become the first White Sox pitcher since 2016 to pitch a complete game shutout.

Eloy Jimenez WILL NOT receive the most AL ROY votes on the White Sox in 2019, that honor will go to Luis Basabe as he rakes in the minors through mid-June and is called up to take over CF duties from Adam Engel, Basabe finishes with double digit HR’s and SB’s and surprises the entire American League.

Tim Anderson, after being called out by White Sox twitter and consulted by ex-teammate Tyler Saladino, channels his inner Billy Dee Williams and sprouts the most beautiful push broom mustachio you have ever seen to win the 2019 White Sox mustache title.

Daniel Palka will leave spring training to join the Chicago mayoral race and WIN on his campaign promise to always be #108ing.

Yoan Moncada will not play 3b, he will not play CF, he will not pass go and collect $200, but he will however make good on his prospect status and post a 25 HR / 25 SB season.

Chorizy-E
Eloy Jimenez and Daniel Palka will combine for 69 home runs. Nice.

Jason Benetti will come to my home to record a FromThe108 Podcast with us. Possibly against his will.

My PED brother, Welington Castillo, will find a new connection and rack up 25 HR, 100 RBI, and 0 suspensions.

Ricky Renteria and Don Cooper will be suspended indefinitely after beating the shit out of Joe West.

If you’ve listened to our most recent podcast, you might have missed something early in the show. Ot happened during the intros where we pass it around and talk about how we are doing. It was during this time Mr. BeefLoaf said he wasn’t sleeping too well cause he had just watched the first 2 episodes of True Detective and was trying to figure out what happened. Wait, wut?

This fucker was trying to figure out what happened! IT’S TWO FUCKING SHOWS IN! It looks to be slated for 8 episodes at least, so how is a guy who has the physique of Columbo (but not necessarily the brilliant mind) losing sleep this early in the game?

Now, I ain’t saying ‘Loaf is dumb, he is actually crazy fucking smart. I run stuff by him all the time. But the smartest guy easily is Chorizy. I am the dumbest guy outta the 3, no question, but hardly the dumbest guy you’ll ever meet. There is no way that there has been enough information given to the viewer to form an opinion much less a theory in the first 2 episodes.

In the first two episodes they are just laying the foundation for the whole story. You don’t move into your house right after they pour the concrete do ya? Nope, you let them frame it. Lay the pipe. Run electric. Hang drywall. You know what I am saying. You gotta give it time to get built.

If you haven’t watched True Detective (it’s on it’s 3rd season, but they are all different stories, not connected) you should start on Season 1. Trust me. It’s creepy, mostly cause it seems like could happen. You can skip Season 2, it was fucking odd. Like not all that entertaining odd. Now, it’s early in the game, but Season 3 seems like a return to the roots. I know you have been fucked by the term before, I know I have (Zwan record sounding like classic Smashing Pumpkins, Pearl Jam records, ect), but it really seems like the 1st season so far.

One thing that came very clear in the 3rd episode is that Stephen Dorff is slowly morphing into Fred Durst. Seriously, check this out –

You put a red Yankees cap on Stephen here he looks like a young Fred Durst. Fred hasn’t aged as well as Stephen, and Stephen smokes like a fucking chimney. And it ain’t a Blu E Cigarette in the show, he makes sweet mouth love to an old school cig about every 32 seconds.

So that is one thing I would have talked about if we had done a podcast this week. I also would have lost my shit about a claim that the Sox could have signed Avi Garcia for what he signed for in Tampa. Yes, someone said that. HOLY FUCKING SHIT.

Listen, if you were a contract worker and you went into the bosses office to sign a new contract and YOU KNEW it was supposed to pay $8 million dollars. Now when you get in that meeting they say, no, we aren’t gonna pay you that, we’d like to offer you less than half of that. How well would that go in your life? You gonna take that offer? FUCK NO YOU WOULDN’T. You are gonna tell that boss to get fucked and leave ASAP. As well you should. I am happy that Avi got a job somewhere, but he no way would have signed with the Sox for less than they would have paid him had they wanted to resign him. It was a horrible take. Straight up HOT GARBAGE.

Come see us tonight and look for me running around at SoxFest. Wear your 108 gear to get a free koozie!

-MSS

The White Sox announced the 1st wave of promo dates and along with that made the announcement of several promo items. This is where I , MSS, am a viking. Everyone wrote a quick blog about the items, but it’s my job to critique these items like it matters. I am NOT gonna critique the free T-Shirt Thursday offerings, well, who cares as I can’t fit into those anyways.

Worst to first, here we go!

Star Wars™ Night, presented by TransUnion, on Saturday, May 4 vs. Boston

Listen, you gotta be fucking kidding me. Here we have a plain ol’ R2D2, nothing Sox related on it, not even in Sox colors, but it looks like background might be Sox related. Ask Uncle Rico how much he likes these cardboard backgrounds. Spoiler, he fucking hates them. The Hawk Solo last year was really fucking unique compared to this. Even the 2016 offering of a generic ass Stormtrooper. If anything, this just proves that we need some goddamn stars on this team so this bullshit can stop. Although Wellington Castillo would be a great R2D2.

Marvel Super Hero™ Night and White Sox Spiderman Bobblehead on July 27 vs. Minnesota

Ok, this isn’t the worst only because I like Spiderman a wee bit more than R2D2. Now, obviously the pic isn’t the final, but hopefully like the IronMan last year it will be Sox colors. If not, this sucks balls too. I don’t mind the tie-in’s but why can’t it be a player? I mean I mocked this up already –

I did the job and it went unnoticed. Not the first time and not the last, but we all know that a Daniel Palka as the Hulk is way more fucking choice* than a Spiderman bobblehead. Right? I know I am right, so no worries.

José Abreu Silver Slugger™ Bobblehead, presented by Constellation Energy, on April 27 vs. Detroit

Here’s the thing, Jose Abreu now joins Frank Thomas, Paul Konerko and Chris Sale as a player that has far too many White Sox bobbleheads. I know, not a bad club, but Jesus, shake it up a little would ya? Props for using the ugly players weekend jersey. That is (kinda) cool. Negative props for doing the 4th bobble for a guy who has been here for 6 seasons.

Los White Sox Soccer Jersey, presented by Coca-Cola, on May 5 vs. Boston 

Now, I like this. I really do. However, I think the patch should be ’83 related. Not sure why they are using the old english, but the batter guy would be 1000% better. I like the colors. Now only if they made a XXL for us Fatty McFattersons.

Carlos Rodón Bobblehead, presented by Wintrust Community Banks, on May 18 vs. Toronto

Kudos to the Sox for going out on a limb and making a bobblehead of Carlos. It hasn’t been the smoothest career for Mr. Rodon, but I think he is gonna have the best year of his career this season. I like the black jersey. I like, as said on the Twitters, no undershirt, not buttoned up, that is Carlos. Now, his face could be really fucked up, but I am gonna say it isn’t. Only drawback is this looks alot like the Mark Buehrle they did in 2017.

White Sox Hawaiian Shirt, presented by Beggars Pizza, on June 15 vs. the Yankees

Normally I would rip this to shreds. It’s a recycled idea, as it’s the 3rd hawaiian shirt they have done in 4 years. That sucks, but this shirt is DOPE AF. It’s so choice*. Love the white. Love the logos. Love the pizza slices. I do hate the fact they are giving it away on a Yankees weekend, which is not so choice*, but what you gonna do? It’s gonna be a hot item, get there early. Easily the best hawaiian shirt they have done. They have gotten better year after year, so that is a plus.

And now, the best of the first wave, drumroll please…..

White Sox Hoodie, presented by Guaranteed Rate, on April 6 vs. Seattle 

Ok, the White Sox bringing back this logo, in black and white is fucking awesome. I love the colors, I love the logo. I just wish for all that is holy that one day a 2XL will be made available. It won’t, but that won’t stop me Opening Weekend getting there early to get one of these bad boys. Also, this just adds to the other great giveaways that Guaranteed Rate has done since they came aboard. The zip up sweatshirt. The quarter zip long sleeve t-shirt. Now this black hoodie with one of the greatest logos the Sox have ever done. Cheers to the Sox and Guaranteed Rate for keeping on top of the giveaway game and making this pile of awesomeness. Gonna be in high demand, get there early for this one too. Bring your friends and swing by the 108 to have a couple, two, tree.

-MSS

* “So Choice” for you youngins is a positive thing. If you haven’t seen Ferris Buller’s Day Off, please do. Last year I brought back “booya” and “dope”. So far, all my attention has been devoted to bringing back “so choice”. I might bring back “bull honkey”, but not sure it deserves to be brought back. Only time will tell.

As an avid drinker (drunkard), I buy my fair share of beer.  And this increases during baseball season.  Over time, I have found that I will always opt for cans over bottles when purchasing delicious beer.  It seems like a trivial difference, but let me explain my case.

Stackability

Unless you’re Dr Dre and Snoop Dogg, you cannot devote an entire fridge to 40s.  So you have to do what you can with the space you have.  When your enjoy Beldar Conehead style mass consumption of beer, this becomes a problem.  And this is the first area where cans really shine.  I can stack about twice as many cans in my fridge as I can bottles.  This goes for coolers as well.

Chillability

Much like it is anchorman and not anchorlady, it is also a scientific fact that beer gets cold quicker and holds its temp longer in aluminum than in a glass bottle.  Honestly, that might be bullshit, but I am pretty sure I saw that in a commercial once and I wholeheartedly believe it to this day.  Pro tip: add some cold water into your cooler full of ice and beer to chill those bad boys quicker.

Koozability

Along the same lines, keeping your drink at the temp you want can be aided by koozies.  Also, koozies are just awesome.  I love them and me and Quernzy have a whole drawer full of em.  And you know what, the ones for bottles just kind of suck.  I like the idea, but how many different drinking accessories do i need to carry?

Portability

Look, if you’re anything like me, you like to go to a tailgate every now and then.  Or maybe just a party at a friends house.  One thing I know is that carrying a shitload of bottles is awful.  Carrying cans is far preferable.

Smashability

Once you’ve had 60-80 beers at a tailgate, there is not so much room in the single garbage can provided to your area by the White Sox, so bottles are just a nuisance.  Instead, you can crush down your cans to nothing.  Also, if you drop em, you don’t have shards of glass everywhere.   Still a party foul, but safer for everyone.

Charitability

You can also give em to a homeless dude to recycle.  Here we are helping the homeless and saving Mother Earth, damn we’re good people.

Shotgunability

It’s not really my thing, but I know the kids these days like to shotgun a beer every now and again.  You can’t do that with a bottle.  You need to use a can.

Tailgate #shotgunning @soxon35th https://t.co/eqk3hVMVW6

— Section 108 (@fromthe108) September 22, 2018

And last, you can do this shit:

-Chorizy-E

Inspired by this tweet question from the big homey Soxsupporter, I bring you my 4 most hated Sports teams (by sport).

 

Football

The 1980’s Green Bay Packers

I know the Bears fucking dominated the Packers in the 1980’s, but the Forrest Gregg / Charles Martin Packers, the ones that effectively ended the Bears reign in 1986 by body slamming Jim McMahon, yea, those fucking Packers.  Fuck them!  I don’t think I have watched a more reprehensible group of goons try to organize themselves as a professional sports team.  Reading Martin’s wiki page, it appears he was out of football shortly after these shenanigans

 

Basketball

The 1980’s Detroit Pistons

Back before everyone widely recognized Jordan as the GOAT, he would annually run into these fucking Pistons teams and they’d beat the shit out of him and the Jordanaires.  As a man of 40 years of age, I routinely lolololol when people say “but Jordan never lost in the FINALS”, yes, this is true, he also got cock blocked from advancing in the playoffs for many, many years by teams like the Celtics and Pistons so it’s kind of a fake argument.  The Pistons were not only a historically great team that got derailed by Isiah Thomas’ achilles, but they were also a historically hateable team.  Most of you probably remember Rodman in a Bulls uni, but he was a sonuvabitch with the Pistons, Rick Mahorn, Spider Salley, fuck, even Dumars and Isiah were pinche cabrons.  All of these fuckers were nothing compared to Bill Laimbeer.  I recently saw a gif / montage of 80’s basketball, showing all of these fights and rough plays and 75% of them were Bill Laimbeer.  Fuck, if I saw Laimbeer in the street right now, I wouldn’t hesitate to run him over with my car.  Hate the fucking Pistons!!!

Hockey

The 1990’s Pittsburgh Penguins

I know Jaromir Jagr is a legend for being like 58 years old and still playing and banging 19 year old chicks and not giving a fuck, but these Penguins blocked the Roenick / Chelios / Belfour Blackhawks from a Cup.  I’m not a hockey guy, and around this time the Bulls were starting their dominance, so the Blackhawks were playing second fiddle, but this was still must watch TV at the time.  Anywho, Super Mario and Jagr face fucked the Blackhawks in those finals.  I still hate thinking about their long greasy sweaty mullets.

Baseball

The Minnesota Twinks

There is no sports franchise that I can more easily extend my fucking middle finger at than the Minnesota Twinks. Fuck Tom Kelly and Ron Gardenhire, fuck Justin Morneau and Kirby Puckett, fuck Brian Dozier and Nick Punto, fuck Torii Hunter and Michael Cuddyer, fuck Johan Santana and Joe Nathan, fuck Carlos Gomez and Jason Kubel.  I fucking hate the Twinks.