The 5 – Teams That Should Rage Spend In Response to the Dodgers

Yesterday we got news that Roki Sasaki was going to the Dodgers and the internet reacted exactly as we’d expect: the Dodgers are ruining the game, baseball is cooked, and of course people that didn’t understand what happened and thought it was an outbid. The interesting thing about all of this is that there is nothing stopping the rest of the league from being the Dodgers other than a willingness to spend on their team. The real problem is that a lot of these billionaire owners are either rent seekers or just straight up pussies. You can’t afford to tip, don’t go to the fucking bar.

There are very good free agents left on the board and some possible trade pieces out there, so who needs to get their shit together and spend?

Toronto Blue Jays

The true loser of the Roki sweepstakes. I was rooting for them when I saw the Myles Straw deal, it felt imminent, and then it was not. The Jays have spent and they seemingly would be willing to spend more. Looking at Roster Resource and seeing Ernie Clement at 3B makes me feel like Alex Bregman is a good place to rage spend some dollars. I am not sure that’s enough to get ’em there, but it’s a damn good start. And if you’re the Blue Jays, you gotta shit or get off the pot, because a lot of their guys have contracts ending in the next 2 years (Vladito, Bichette, Gausman, Bassitt, Kirk, Springer, Varsho).

Boston Red Sox

This one feels like it could get wild. Even though it doesn’t feel like a fit, bring in Pete Alonso. I know you have Casas, but he’s not a guarantee to be on the field and there is a DH spot. Make Yoshida get his ass in the OF. The talk around bringing in Bregman and having him play 2B is fun, but you have a great farm system. Trade for Luis Arraez while the Padres are in the midst of a law suit. Seems like they’ll be looking to off-load that $14M and check in on what it would take to bring in Dylan Cease while you’re at it. You do all that and the Fuck The Yankees shirts will fly off the shelf.

San Francisco Giants

I have the Giants here even though they already inked a nice contract with Willy Adames this off-season, but they’re in the Dodgers’ division, so you gotta keep going. This is another team that could fill that DH spot with Pete Alonso. Roster Resource currently has Wilmer Flores in that spot for the Giants, barf. They can also use another starting pitcher. You already went out and got Justin Verlander, you gonna go out and get the other guy in his 40s: Max Scherzer? Would be fun, but you can also still get a Jack Flaherty or Nick Pivetta in this market. Get out there and push into the $250M range Giants!

Chicago Cubs

Look, I don’t want this to happen, but it doesn’t mean it shouldn’t. It sounds like the Cubs were in on Bregman but didn’t get there. Well, offer more years or more money! I don’t mean to over simplify it, but hold off on your next real estate purchase in Wrigleyville and throw some money at Alex. I like Matt Shaw, but announcing Bregman this weekend while you got your convention going? Yeah, do that. Much like the Giants above, they should be in play for some of these remaining pitchers as well.

Los Angeles Angels

Let’s get nuts! Every year around this time, I look around and I’m surprised by the remaining free agents. I think to myself, what if a team decided to scoop up everything on the market. One time in my life I want it to happen. The time is now: Pete Alonso 1b, Alex Bregman 3b, Anthony Santander RF, Jack Flaherty SP, Tanner Scott CL. That Rendon money is coming off the books soon enough (after 2026). Throw in all your chips while the rest of your division isn’t spending.

There are a bunch of teams that should be spending but are not, like the Braves and Mariners. I didn’t bother to put them on the list because there seems to be no chance of it happening. Not that these others will happen, but some teams have already seemingly taken them out of any spending this off-season.

-Chorizy-E