White Sox “Trades” with EVERY TEAM – AL West Edition

A long time ago, I was listening to an interview with legendary poker professional Phil Ivey and the interviewer asked the question (paraphrasing) How would you recommend a player learning the game get better the fastest? Phil said something to the effect of (paraphrasing) Buy in to a game at much lower stakes than you would normally play, and then play every single hand for an hour. Try and figure out how you would play all of these different hands in different situations and positions that you are normally taught not to play in. In the spirit of that recommendation from an all-time great, Chorizy and I are going to undertake the exercise of making a White Sox trade with every team in the majors…..this is the AL West Edition.

Oakland Athletics

108er: BeefLoaf
White Sox send:
Zack Collins, Reynaldo Lopez and Jose Ruiz
White Sox receive:
Sean Manaea
Rationale:
Manaea is a very solid get for the White Sox who need mid-rotation help that is cost controlled (he’s in his final two arbitration eligible seasons) and they give up some spare parts that you all mostly hate for that convenience. Of course, you already know how this movie ends, Manaea arrives, stinks and the spare parts that the White Sox couldn’t get to produce all become cheap and productive parts of a 95 win team in Oakland. FUCK!!

Houston Astros

108er: Chorizy-E
White Sox send: Tony LaRussa
White Sox receive: Dusty Baker
Rationale: All you jerks didn’t want Dusty, but now you’ll love this! This is perfect, they’re about the same age, but they should really be swapped if you think about it. The Sox did well under mediocre player’s manager Ricky Rents, imagine them with Dusty at the helm. Not to mention, it’s gonna be comedic gold when he walks into training camp and calls Dallas Keuchel “Darren”. On the other side, TLR can go to a truly shady org and make racist gestures in the dugout with Yuli Gurriel.

Seattle Mariners

108er: Chorizy-E
White Sox send:
Zack Collins, rights to Ribbie and Roobarb
White Sox receive: Tom Murphy, bullpen cart (tugboat)
Rationale: Tom Murphy missed the 2020 season with a foot injury and that should have been his introduction as a starter. Now with Luis Torrens in the picture, he likely is still not the full time starter in Seattle and likely will take more of a back seat over time. Collins has more control and is really the type of 1B/C/DH guy the Mariners love to fill their team with. I can see the Sox using Murphy in a similar role to McCann for much less $. But this is the Mariners, so had to make it a little weird. Plus, I’ve wanted that bullpen cart for 20+ years.

Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim California USA

108er: BeefLoaf
White Sox send:
Andrew Vaughn, Dane Dunning & Codi Heuer
White Sox receive:
Jo Adell & a $30M piece of debt named Albert Pujols
Rationale:
The Angels are dying for production from 1b and on the pitching side, the White Sox badly need a second outfielder that can actually be a regular and field their position. Adell and Vaughn are both top prospects and you rarely see a deal like this, but it makes sense for both teams and with the White Sox having the cleaner balance sheet and able to foot $30M to even up the deal.

Texas Rangers

108er: Chorizy-E
White Sox send: Carlos Rodon
White Sox receive: Jordan Lyles
Rationale: This is a pretty straightforward trade. From what we know, the Sox were horny for Lyles last off-season, Lyles underperformed for the Rangers last year, he’s owed more than Rodon will be, and Rodon has the pedigree that a hot first half could make him a trade chip for the Rangers. We also know the Sox are pretty much done with Carlos, so there is some semblance of reason here.

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