As you know, or maybe you don’t, I am a fan of the Big 3. If you’re not familiar, it’s half court basketball played by a bunch of guys who were recently in the NBA. Because it’s half court and because a lot of these guys don’t have a lot of spring left, it is quite different than a regular game. And to me, that’s part of the allure.
With that in mind, I was thinking about how Major League Baseball could do something similar and use their off-season to air it. Here are a few of the ideas I had:
Home Run Derby
You may not remember this show and I’ve only ever seen it syndication (I’m not that old you jerks). It’s two hitters going head to head over 9 innings of them just trying to crush dingers. My thought is to get some guys who love the attention and can probably use a few bucks to come out and smash the ball. We’re doing this in the winter, so having it take place in the Caribbean makes sense and in order to boost the players’ power a bit, aluminum bats are allowed. PEDs too.
I loved wiffle ball as a kid and I’d love to see some big ass former pros playing it. I can’t even imagine which players would excel at this version of baseball. But I have to imagine pitchers that threw a ton of junk would be extra special here. And in case you’re wondering, both the thin yellow bat and the giant red bat are allowed.
Prince Fielder Vegetarian Cooking Show
This has intrigued me since I heard about it. Prince is a vegetarian, but he’s still #108thicc. Now I know there are ways to stay thicc and not eat meat, but I don’t know what they are. I honestly just want to see what the guy eats.
The NBA and NHL do a great job with this, but it is understandable why the MLB doesn’t. You don’t want one of your pitchers blowing out their arm trying to throw 110 MPH in a comp. But guess what, if it’s some washed out prospect that had a cannon and no control, they’d be perfect. Imagine Daniel Cabrera back in the day. And you can have all kinds of events: speed pitch, accuracy from the outfield, distance from the outfield, bunting accuracy, base running. You get the idea. You’ve probably even thought of the players that would be stars in this, despite absolutely not being stars in the pros. This can actually be a tour in the winter with former MLB players facing off with those from KBO and NPB teams.
Our beloved Chicago sport should make it to the MLB Network. Two leagues: one consisting of Chicago’s finest 16″ players and one with all former major league baseball players. The two leagues never play each other until the Championship. Did I mention, the players have to drink throughout the game?
Have some ideas? Lay ’em on me.
About The Author
Section 108 Row 13, Bassist for Barren Plains, Acclaimed drunkard