Why wait, Yoan Moncada is GREAT RIGHT NOW, LFG!!

In honor of Jeopardy! not being fun anymore according to some folks, we are bringing you this blog post with the Answer first, followed by the Question, enjoy!!!

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THE ANSWER

TRADES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

White Sox get Wil Myers (and $40M cash); Padres get Yolmer Sanchez

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This trade costs damn near nothing (except what’s left of Myers contract) and it fits both teams well. Myers is competent in a corner OF position until someone more competent can arrive, he can also flex into 1b / 3b / dh, basically anywhere you want and he’s an above league average hitter. The Padres on the other hand went out this off-season and signed Ian Kinsler to be their starting second basemen utility infielder once Luis Urias and Fernando Tatis Jr. were ready, guess what, Kinsler is toast (he is 37) and Urias and Tatis Jr. are ready af. This is an easy way to provide additional floor to a promising White Sox offense.

Okay, okay, I know we really need a starting pitcher, so let’s get on with this shit.

White Sox get Zack Greinke (and $20M cash); Diamondbacks get Micker Adolfo, Bernardo Flores, Laz Rivera

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Yea, it costs something to get Zack Greinke, especially if you want some money shaved off, so what, that’s what prospect depth is supposed to afford you. Greinke immediately pushes the starting staff up to mediocrity (imagine him taking Ivan Nova‘s starts) and is signed through 2021, giving the rest of the young pitchers time to get ready. I’ll miss Micker, because I think he’ll eventually mash, but this is what it costs.

White Sox get Mike Minor, Willie Calhoun; Rangers get Blake Rutherford, Kodi Medeiros, Jameson Fisher

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WHO??? Mike Minor, you probably never heard of him, they didn’t go up there and tell you, but Mike Minor was good last year in a terrible ballpark and has been a boss this year for the Rangers. I also add in Willie Calhoun who is a defensive minded DH……I kid. Calhoun is supposed to hit, but the Rangers are mad at him, just like you are mad at your dog for shitting on the rug, but we’d be the new dog owner, so it would be water under the bridge. I trade Blake Rutherford and with the White Sox outfield depth, I assure you we won’t miss him, even when he comes up for the Rangers and hits for a high but empty average in their spacious park. Minor is signed through 2020, perfectly bridging the gap from now till then (you know, the future). He’s the White Sox #1 starter when he arrives, even though you don’t know who the fuck he is.

THE QUESTION

Good day friends, it’s your pal BeefLoaf and as I settle in to talk atcha for a few, just a reminder that the 108 Store is packed with your favorite t-shirts and other sundry items for PEAK #108ing so check that shit out right now and make a purchase and MySoxSummer will write you a love letter in the care package.

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Anywho, I like many of yous out der, wanted this White Sox front office to make a few splashes in the off-season. We’s pretty much at the point where we are tired of seeing a lousy team stumble through 162 and were looking for a little more competency across the diamond and back through the bullpen. I for one specifically have been very afraid that we were finally going to get the Yoan Moncada that was advertised when the White Sox traded for him in December of 2016 and the White Sox would waste it. 5 fWAR Moncada would be accompanied by nothing but a top 5 draft pick, AGAIN. He’s doing that shit, lighting up the AL by cutting his strike out rate, playing marginally better defense at 3B and all in all just smashing the ball when he makes contact. But alas, the conditions appear to be more upsetting than that, as Tim Anderson has taken another step in his growth as a player (materially as a hitter) and torched the AL to the tune of a 184 wRC+ (this is some advanced stat, nerd, pocket protector shit that synthesizes his performance on offense into 1 number, its good, only Mike Trout has a higher one of these in the AL, so it means that basically he’s almost as good as Mike Trout……..for the first month). The White Sox looked primed to absofuckinglutely waste very good seasons by their 2 young phenoms on the left side of the infield.

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Now, you at home are probably gonna say, BUT BEEF, it doesn’t matter, because these breakthroughs are what we are waiting for. I agree with you, that part is good, what’s not good is this team won’t be good this year, and this team won’t be good next year, because there ain’t enough stuff coming from the proverbial farm between now and then to class up the joint on 35th and Shields, if you know what I mean. So we’d be back to ingesting a White Sox stars and scrubs roster, just like 2016. Do you remember 2016??

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Most of you are going to echo our fearless leader Rick Hahn “The Money Will Be Spent”…….but why wait to start spending it? Why can’t we start to spend this money, RIGHT. DAMN. NOW. Why shouldn’t we improve this roster immediately and raise the floor on our 2019-2021 and beyond teams?

-BeefLoaf

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